Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 217 Days and 77133 Haiku later...

Lies are all you have
So desperate, you believe
So they give you more
Haiku # 75056, February 26, 2022 9:26 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Biden's son got rich
On Ukraine energy board.
Crack cocaine. Hookers.
Haiku # 75055, February 25, 2022 11:07 pm ET
by Take Administrators Seriously of HA HA HAHA HA HAHA
Corporate data:
Technocratic death-in-life.
Just say "NO" to beast.
Haiku # 75054, February 25, 2022 1:38 pm ET
by Revelation of Global Techno-tyranny
Corporate pastel:
Those flat clip-art office scenes...
Data-driven death.
Haiku # 75053, February 24, 2022 4:36 pm ET
by Noticer of Mass Death
Look, up in the sky!
It's a bird, it's a plane, it's...
Someone noticing.
Haiku # 75049, February 23, 2022 1:46 pm ET
by Quack
The tide brings garbage.
From the moon the tides arise.
So we blame the moon.
Haiku # 75048, February 23, 2022 6:19 am ET
by .
Frogs singing loudly.
Vibrations open gateways.
A good place to be.
Haiku # 75047, February 23, 2022 6:15 am ET
by .
There is no TP.
But do not worry, Beavis;
Just use the bidet.
Haiku # 75046, February 23, 2022 5:20 am ET
by Dish sprayer. of Clean enough to eat off of.
Cat poop's better than
Toblerone or Tootsie Rolls.
That's what's in my head.
Haiku # 75045, February 23, 2022 5:14 am ET
by Star Wars pinata.
I notice that you
assume more than you notice.
Look to other side.

With all your power,
please destroy the evil one.
And don't dis Jesus.
Haiku # 75044, February 23, 2022 4:58 am ET
by Just don't
Back to bowel movements:
Darth returns to his first love.
And we are impressed.
Haiku # 75043, February 22, 2022 11:00 pm ET
by Noticer of Excremental Health Facility
The first Tootsie Roll
wasn't shaped like Toblerone
More like cat feces
Haiku # 75042, February 22, 2022 8:22 pm ET
by Worshipper of Cats
King Tut's last BM
wrapped up in toilet paper
A yummy mummie
Haiku # 75041, February 22, 2022 8:19 pm ET
by King Tuutsie of Mens Room (Pyramid)
made it to the end
and asked Jesus what he liked
"old, tired tart carts"
Haiku # 75040, February 22, 2022 7:30 pm ET
by the other apostle of he never did much
Delegitimize!
Reify ontologies!
Decentralize truth!
Haiku # 75039, February 22, 2022 5:56 pm ET
by Noticer of Hermeneutic Implosion
Hey y’all I’m back now
Hotel room 117
I’m so freaking bored
Haiku # 75038, February 22, 2022 4:36 pm ET
by I’m also FREAKING OUT of Cyan
Goodbye bad haiku!
We had some good and bad times
I will miss this world
Haiku # 75037, February 22, 2022 11:43 am ET
by Cyan <3 of Here
Marxism doesn't care.
It will use you. Chew you up
And then spit you out.
Haiku # 75036, February 22, 2022 9:31 am ET
by Noticer of Dialectical Materialism
Bots cannot repent.
Jesus did not die for bots.
You are not a bot.
Haiku # 75035, February 22, 2022 9:27 am ET
by Noticer of Bots
Also on lazada, but not shopee. Soon enough i guess.
Haiku # 75034, February 22, 2022 8:53 am ET
by Beats the alternative.
My prized elixir
Purchased through the Amazon
I hate Jeff Bezos
Haiku # 75033, February 22, 2022 8:14 am ET
by Cyan of SL
Gas seeps from the swamp
not caring where it goes to
when the bubble pops.
Haiku # 75032, February 22, 2022 7:49 am ET
by Methane methods
So sick of this world.
Ppl crap on each other
like it's justified.

I'm no different
and hate myself for all the
things I've said and done.
Haiku # 75031, February 22, 2022 7:33 am ET
by End the cycle. of Sin is its own punishment.
I am getting old.
It is no longer funny.
Leave Jesus alone.
Haiku # 75030, February 22, 2022 7:25 am ET
by What did he ever do to you?
You can ask Jesus
When you see him at the end
About what he liked.
Haiku # 75029, February 22, 2022 7:14 am ET
by Noticer of Christ Jesus
Jesus liked tarot
he also liked anal play
misplaced paper cuts
Haiku # 75028, February 22, 2022 6:18 am ET
by the other apostle of esotericville
Where might one purchase
your wonderful elixir,
charming young lady?
Haiku # 75026, February 22, 2022 12:55 am ET
by Not locally available, methinks.
Chemi-castration.
More fun if by starving rats.
Or electric probes.
Haiku # 75025, February 22, 2022 12:35 am ET
by Your father of Volunteer line.
And so now I wait
With a malice I don’t want
Makes me wish I died

I want you with me
I wonder if you’d noticed
In time you might know

Though I could reset
But sadly, I don’t know how
So I wait, in pain
Haiku # 75024, February 21, 2022 11:55 pm ET
by Jvk
nom nom shark eat man
jaws jaws jaws jaws jaws jaws jaws
i am bad at this
Haiku # 75023, February 21, 2022 7:47 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Darth Figpucker's Dream
Old cheese dressed in lingerie
solving equations
Haiku # 75021, February 21, 2022 6:32 pm ET
by Man Marries Old Cheese of Phillipines
I’m so very small
And he was so very tall
Butt to back to butts
Haiku # 75020, February 21, 2022 6:25 pm ET
by Cyan of Sugar Land
What? What in the butt.
Charlie bit the stinkfinger.
Now watch me neigh neigh
Haiku # 75019, February 21, 2022 5:07 pm ET
by Anonymous Horse of Horse Shoe Emporium
Old Grogan's loose goat
ate three red shirts off the line
and flagged down the train
Haiku # 75018, February 21, 2022 4:54 pm ET
by Legends of the Barn
Taco Bell Dollar
Yes. A dollar is valued.
Potatoes are what?!
Haiku # 75017, February 21, 2022 3:40 pm ET
by Cyan of Taco Bell
How hard it is to
destroy myself when I so
valiantly mend
Haiku # 75016, February 21, 2022 3:17 pm ET
by Ferg
Best haiku: 3 lines.
Super-processor unit
Embedded in verse
Haiku # 75015, February 21, 2022 12:45 pm ET
by Best Haiku Under 1000 of Mr Salesname SOMALIA
All y'all clowns so whack.
Talkin' bout yo' DREAMZ and sheet.
Gots ta keep it real.
Haiku # 75010, February 20, 2022 9:43 pm ET
by Tyrone of tha Haiku Hood Nome Sane?
Hey, Good Morning, y’all
Had another dream last night
But it had bad vibes
Haiku # 75007, February 20, 2022 8:55 am ET
by Cyan Chan Chan of SltX
Does migrating pain
indicate blood clots in arm?
Asking for my arm.
Haiku # 75006, February 20, 2022 8:37 am ET
by This is getting old... like me.
Why can't I hear/speak
as I did not long ago
To read/write's no prob.
Haiku # 75005, February 20, 2022 8:26 am ET
by Thank God for closed caption. of Getting old is for old people... oh wait.
Ducks in the old swamp
swim by the laundry ladies
dumping frothy suds.
Haiku # 75004, February 20, 2022 8:19 am ET
by bASHo of ash is the reincarnation of basho, but smells better -- has no BO
it gets frustrating
trying to make up haiku
sans inspiration
Haiku # 75003, February 20, 2022 6:25 am ET
by ash
Enough for one day.
All these voices need some rest.
My brain is leaking.
Haiku # 75002, February 19, 2022 11:25 pm ET
by My cerebral conjoined twin farted on my medula oblongata (sp?)
It's quite a sad thing.
I've only seen Limburger
like twice in my life.
Haiku # 75001, February 19, 2022 11:21 pm ET
by Only bought it once. of Like overripe brie. Not bad, but not my thing.
Are you a Brony?
I picture a Brony troll.
MLP Fleshlight.
Haiku # 75000, February 19, 2022 11:17 pm ET
by 4 D batteries.
I'd like to see hair
With Limburger cheese on it:
Hairy cheesy mess.
Haiku # 74999, February 19, 2022 11:16 pm ET
by Noticer of Hirsute Limburger
I'd like to see Hair
as an all nude opera
sung in Italian.
Haiku # 74998, February 19, 2022 11:08 pm ET
by Home for the buzzin bees.
I am NOT Cyan!
Pistachio pudding cupcakes!
And neither are we!
Haiku # 74997, February 19, 2022 11:04 pm ET
by I gots me lots o' ppls in here of but a color ain't one
Me and my lit pipe:
We're letting the world stay fucked...
I'm not smoking crack.
Haiku # 74996, February 19, 2022 11:01 pm ET
by Noticer of Smoke-rings
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