Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 219 Days and 77137 Haiku later...

How fat are you now?
You really should lose some weight.
Heart attack's waiting.
Haiku # 73389, November 9, 2021 10:33 am ET
by Rigid Rigamortis Wiggle Riggle Worm.
I smasha the grapes
I smasha you in the face
I make a you whine
Haiku # 73388, November 9, 2021 10:06 am ET
by Rural Guido of Rural location
Have you ever dipped
your dink in someone's wine just
because you hate them?
Haiku # 73387, November 9, 2021 7:49 am ET
by Then propose a toast. of Sorry, is it a bit salty?
Extra syllable.
Sticking out like my penis,
caught in the ladder.
Haiku # 73386, November 9, 2021 5:00 am ET
by OUCH! of Just here to wash the windows. Special cleaning fluid.
Call me paranoid.
Have you noticed Noticer's
infatuation?

Darth this, Darth that. Seriously gets old. Why don't you call me up some time. Buy me a beer.

Instead of "Noticer" call yourself "Antagonizer".
Giving this ant agony. Hi, sir.
Ha! You're probably my secretary.
Haiku # 73385, November 9, 2021 4:52 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Pygmy rapist will
filet and cook you after.
But will you taste sweet?
Haiku # 73384, November 9, 2021 4:36 am ET
by Somehow I doubt it. of Dead hooker in the trunk.
i just got blocked on
twitter by some guy who founded
wikipedia
Haiku # 73383, November 9, 2021 12:53 am ET
by vhs
Midget peeping Tom
Always the one caught looking
Fuck this goddam ladder!
Haiku # 73382, November 8, 2021 11:47 pm ET
by Noticer of wee male
im too paranoid
to be hamlet, alas poor...
oh, fuck, who's skull that?
Haiku # 73381, November 8, 2021 11:20 pm ET
by vhs
If you've been out-shagged,
you're one step ahead of us
other lame "poets".
Haiku # 73380, November 8, 2021 10:15 pm ET
by Good night, sweet prince! of May the moon shine down beams of golden fortune upon thee.
well since i have been
outjoked, outfoxed, outshagged then
I'm going to bed...
Haiku # 73379, November 8, 2021 8:02 pm ET
by moxie
Has your town been overrun by e-scooters?
Call 1-800-SCOOT-RID today!
Illegal aluminum recycler professionals you can count on.
Haiku # 73378, November 8, 2021 7:25 pm ET
by Seriously!
What would you like for
my next haiku to be on?
How about stop lights?
Haiku # 73377, November 8, 2021 6:06 pm ET
by That could be fun!
The Wall St. Journal
ran an article on stuff
that you shouldn't buy.
Haiku # 73376, November 8, 2021 6:02 pm ET
by Gotta catch 'em all!
Have you ever read
Emily Post's Etiquette?
It's captivating.
Haiku # 73375, November 8, 2021 5:59 pm ET
by Even better than TikTok!
He drew a circle.
Next to that he drew a square.
Then a triangle.
Haiku # 73374, November 8, 2021 5:49 pm ET
by Getting into shape.
Entropenis?
Sound like a catheter brand name.
Probably made in China.

If you put a catheter up your nose you can douche out your nasal cavity and beat a covid RT-PCR test. 1 liter water, 3 large spoons iodized salt, 1 spoon baking soda, 1 spoon baby shampoo, 10 drops of 10% iodine solution.
Haiku # 73373, November 8, 2021 12:49 pm ET
by Fun times!
By supporting communism, we give them money to promote communism. Remember when the USSR fell... that was artificial. Get us to let our guard down. My opinion. Could be wrong.
Haiku # 73372, November 8, 2021 12:44 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
entropy vs penis?
chaos vs order? death, life?
moral systems, duh?
Haiku # 73371, November 8, 2021 12:43 pm ET
by vhs of 42, the meaning of life is a zen statement
Because we support communism.
If you don't believe it, look on all the products you buy. Where are they made? We buy them b/c we are greedy capitalists, and their products are cheap. And this isn't a haiku!

Oh, look what you made me do. Look what you made me do.... I forget the rest of that song. Proudly.
Haiku # 73370, November 8, 2021 12:42 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Evil versus good.
But what do they even mean?
Not sure they are real.
Haiku # 73369, November 8, 2021 12:39 pm ET
by We're all evil. Just look at what we have done... of What we do, and what we will do. Keeps getting worse.
why is communism
being promoted so strongly
by the media?
Haiku # 73368, November 8, 2021 12:38 pm ET
by vhs
Momma always said,
"Evil is as evil does."
Have some chocolates.
Haiku # 73367, November 8, 2021 12:37 pm ET
by Forrest Figpucker
Nascar castration.
Nastration Castrol oil.
Castor bean toxins.
Haiku # 73366, November 8, 2021 12:34 pm ET
by Nerve gas bomb Indy 500. of Good idea! Woke balls.
that's true, but if smart
people do not take the cue
of honor from them

the bad guys will rule
over them and do bad things
so it's not dumb so

much as "evil" folks
Haiku # 73365, November 8, 2021 12:34 pm ET
by vhs
How can it be that
stupid people have power?
The answer's simple.

Smart people don't want it!
Haiku # 73364, November 8, 2021 12:32 pm ET
by Read your Douglas Adams books again.
nascar has leaders
that promote social justice
get woke, castrate self
Haiku # 73363, November 8, 2021 10:36 am ET
by vhs
its the end of the
world or the big fuck up at
a new beginning.
Haiku # 73362, November 8, 2021 10:25 am ET
by vhs
you know those with the
power are often stupid
how do they get it?
Haiku # 73361, November 8, 2021 10:24 am ET
by vhs of why am i trying to be fair?
I'm calling grandma.
"You have reached grandma. Press one..."
For Christ's fucking sake!
Haiku # 73360, November 8, 2021 8:17 am ET
by The main problem with the world today.
The problem is that
everyone wants to be heard
but will not do shit.
Haiku # 73359, November 8, 2021 8:15 am ET
by Shit is what is needed.
plan 9 haiku from
outer space with bad spelling
lets go lugosi
Haiku # 73358, November 7, 2021 11:54 pm ET
by vhs
years ago i did
not realize i would artitiulate
my thoughts here
Haiku # 73357, November 7, 2021 11:47 pm ET
by vhs of i was very angry at this place
The gold is in there,
deep inside your filthy guts.
Who will retrieve it?
Haiku # 73356, November 7, 2021 7:56 pm ET
by Miner for a Darth of Gold of Hollywood, Redwood
Where's the gold hidden?
This town isn't big enough
for the both of us
Haiku # 73355, November 7, 2021 7:26 pm ET
by Shootout of Ol' Willow
Ready for Jesus
If you knew he was coming
would you bake a cake?
Haiku # 73354, November 7, 2021 7:22 pm ET
by Choice of Angel Food or devil's food
Apocalypse Pro
These Jim Bakker Food Buckets
double as latrine
Haiku # 73353, November 7, 2021 7:19 pm ET
by Buckets of Doom
Those other three months
A Dogeater centerfold
Foamy wave. Nude seagull.
Haiku # 73352, November 7, 2021 5:20 pm ET
by Noticer of Something for everyone
Hey Darth -- can you dance?
I bet you are so clumsy . . .
But I might be wrong.
Haiku # 73351, November 7, 2021 3:56 pm ET
by Good Foot of I Likes to Move It Move It
vhs, featured
August,February, June
(Poetic poses)

The Australian guy
January, March, July
(A peek Down Under)

Saved the best for last
October, November and
red hot Darthcember
Haiku # 73350, November 7, 2021 2:44 pm ET
by A purr of by the fireplace
Men of Bad Haiku
New for 2022!
All Nude Calendar
Haiku # 73349, November 7, 2021 1:59 pm ET
by $9.99 of make cheques payable to Starkitten
Figpucker, are you there?
Is it Darthlight Savings time?
Give us more haiku
Haiku # 73348, November 7, 2021 1:54 pm ET
by Darthlight of outselling Fleshlight
Is it possible?
Did you find the hidden gold?
War crimes and mai tais.
Haiku # 73347, November 7, 2021 1:02 pm ET
by Put the lime in the coconut. of cure for covid, aids, ebola, and bored feet.
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Haiku # 73346, November 7, 2021 8:46 am ET
by LarryNeerb of Colombia
Starkitten coked-up:
thought she was D. Figpucker
living on the Rez...
Haiku # 73345, November 7, 2021 7:29 am ET
by Philip Pino of Luzon
"Crud's" a bit vague,
but if unidentified,
what else to call it?
Haiku # 73344, November 7, 2021 6:23 am ET
by blahblahblah
Things you find in beards.
toast crumbs, spit, lint, germs, dead skin
soup residue, debris, crud
Haiku # 73343, November 7, 2021 5:16 am ET
by Anonymous of North Pole
Christmas is cancelled
because my greasy balls itch.
See you next year, folks!
Haiku # 73342, November 7, 2021 5:02 am ET
by Santa Claus of North Pole
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Увидимся!
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https://community.xim.tech/index.php?action=profile;u=184239
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Haiku # 73341, November 7, 2021 2:30 am ET
by Antoniogeh of Armenia
Just letting you know
I haven't slept in 2 days
Not even catnaps
Haiku # 73340, November 6, 2021 10:08 pm ET
by Starkitten
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