Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 24 Days and 77403 Haiku later...

The Empress Feng Ming
ponders a great mystery:
haiku prophecy.
Haiku # 73243, November 2, 2021 9:12 pm ET
by But She Still Has 300 Courtiers To Bury Alive of Shang Dyasty TOMB
This is so crazy...
Moxie wrote this hours before
the planes hit towers.

(pasted below, from 2001):

the cloven hoof was
about power, jackboots and
such was Hitler kids...

so the stones came up
the tower built up on blood
and iron and so

the thunder came down
and the swastika fell
the falling tower

Haiku # 13554, September 10, 2001 11:29 am ET
by Moxie
Haiku # 73242, November 2, 2021 9:09 pm ET
by Time Traveler of Haiku Machine
I have some catnip
that will make it all better
even the poetry
Haiku # 73241, November 2, 2021 4:11 pm ET
by Sk
What is life about?
Accomplishment? Owning stuff?
And is it worth it?

I don't think it is.
It's dull entertaining God.
So let's never write.
Haiku # 73240, November 2, 2021 3:50 pm ET
by I think best idea ever!
Wait... you're taking your time and scrolling through old haiku? Why the hell is that? You looking for something? Maybe something your client can use in divorce court? LOL.

Well, the FBI didn't arrest me for trying to buy nukes on here. Though I'm still in the market if anyone has one. Just call or email me. You know how.

Aliens are going psychically manipulate Biden into a stand off against China when he discovers they purposely released corona. Of course China has a billion people to spare. They're happy to kill a few off by releasing viruses. And they haven't released their worst yet. They are weakening us through economic/bio-warfare first. Then they will release the really bad virus. Will Biden stand down. Will he push the big red button? Will he have a secret weapon? Something like... my poetry read to them through loud speakers. That could work.
Haiku # 73239, November 2, 2021 3:16 pm ET
by Just stinking out loud.
Jeez, did I say that?
Leaning toward asteroid
more and more these days.

Sift through the trash dump
You might find a gold necklace.
Then is it worth it?
Haiku # 73238, November 2, 2021 3:07 pm ET
by I still want a refund for visiting this site. of Can I have my money back? Janis? Hmmmm?
A major virus
is needed to cleanse the world.
More so in China.

(Darth, like Janis is prophetic.
He scribed this immortal verse in 2016)

Haiku #53311, by df of Chinese hotdogs made from zika babies. Criminal sapitalism hiding under a red flag
Haiku # 73237, November 2, 2021 11:17 am ET
by Time Machine of Haiku Traveler
Haiku's from JAPAN?
Oh man did I mess that up . . .
next to the carp pool.
Haiku # 73236, November 2, 2021 11:03 am ET
by Your Turn to Drive Kids to School of Car Pool
The Five Spices Mix.
The Four Harmonies resound.
The Empress breaks wind.
Haiku # 73235, November 2, 2021 11:01 am ET
by Fart Jokes for Darth of Late Qin Dynasty
Upper right old man
is really Chinese trans-girl
and boy, she need shave!
Haiku # 73234, November 2, 2021 10:58 am ET
by Gong Li of Bang a Gong, King Kong.
Gong Hee Fat Choy. Wang.
Tales of the Yellow River
by I.P. Daily
Haiku # 73233, November 2, 2021 10:55 am ET
by 5th Grade Jokes of Han Dynasty
You! Ming Feng! Slave girl:
Get back to your work chop-chop.
You no stand around.
Haiku # 73232, November 2, 2021 10:50 am ET
by Ming Feng the Duck Farming Maiden of Five Dynasties and Ten Kingdoms
Old Man would not eat
the rotten verse of Ming Feng
but he eat her dog.
Haiku # 73231, November 2, 2021 10:46 am ET
by Dog Was Dead of Thousand Year Dog Egg
Feng Ming lifts her skirt:
Greater Mongolia sighs.
Horseman invade West.
Haiku # 73230, November 2, 2021 10:44 am ET
by Sui Tang Liao Song of Chingiz Khan's Mother
Ming Feng killed her dog
because it refused to lick
the white off her face.
Haiku # 73229, November 2, 2021 10:40 am ET
by Golden Opera of Guanxi Detention Unit #458
Courtesan Ming Feng
Dug up her rotten Shih Tzu.
The old man ate it.
Haiku # 73228, November 2, 2021 10:38 am ET
by Splendid Tales of Shang Dynasty
Old Mandarin man:
Yes, you sir in upper right...
You eat rotten dog.
Haiku # 73227, November 2, 2021 10:33 am ET
by Eastern Delicacies of Western Wave
Had Bike-u. Petal.
Tinsmith peddles the metal.
You so black (kettle).
Haiku # 73226, November 2, 2021 10:31 am ET
by Pot Calling of Pol Pot's Potty Humor
Waah! Wah! Waah! I'm gay,
And the rest of the damn world
is not gay enough...
Haiku # 73225, November 2, 2021 10:25 am ET
by Gay E. Nuff of Gay 90's
Pronoun am racists.
Cisgender are oppression.
Zhey is dysphoric.
Haiku # 73224, November 2, 2021 10:03 am ET
by Grammar-based Hate Speech of Abolish Grammar NOW !
Is there a pronoun
for someone who hates pronouns
and what they imply?
Haiku # 73223, November 2, 2021 9:52 am ET
by I don't care what you "identify as". of You're a twat waffle.
Golfers whacking it
on ESPN TV.
Look at those balls fly.
Haiku # 73222, November 2, 2021 9:48 am ET
by Jon Rahm taking a break to wash his balls. of He's been Rahming hard.
I'll identify
as a self cleaning toaster
oven on steroids.
Haiku # 73221, November 2, 2021 9:43 am ET
by As seen on TV. of That's me!
I'll boycott this site.
Your prices keep going up.
It used to be free.
Haiku # 73220, November 2, 2021 9:41 am ET
by But look at all it's cost me now!
It is quite simple
I can tell you are confused.
Your pronoun? ....Asshole
Haiku # 73219, November 2, 2021 9:31 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
He didn't give birth
Just "feeding the geese" so fast
he spewed out his balls
Haiku # 73218, November 2, 2021 7:57 am ET
by Children of the nutsac
Men are giving birth
One fella pushed out breech twins
while watching the game.
Haiku # 73217, November 2, 2021 7:07 am ET
by Stretchmarks of a lonesome schlong
I haven't bathed yet
My pronouns are scratch and sniff
and old monkey butt
Haiku # 73216, November 2, 2021 6:59 am ET
by Old Monkey Butt
My pronoun are "spit".
Spit am genderqueer ally.
We am psychotic.
Haiku # 73215, November 2, 2021 6:20 am ET
by Fran Sanfisco of How DARE You
Sure, I will use them.
Oh, you mean use the pronouns.
I thought the people.
Haiku # 73214, November 2, 2021 6:18 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I don't understand.
Transgenderification.
Why be what you're not.
Haiku # 73213, November 2, 2021 6:14 am ET
by Can I be a race car? of I identify as a Formula 1 race car.
My pronouns for you:
OINK/IT/APPLE/RUMP/SOMEONE
You will use them, please.
Haiku # 73212, November 2, 2021 6:13 am ET
by Zhey Am Not Funny of Basic Grammar
I won't need a bath
after you have spit on me.
*bends over* wash it good.
Haiku # 73211, November 2, 2021 6:11 am ET
by Good enough for cats and dogs. of Good enough for the Lord of All Evil.
Halloween candy.
Does the Vatican do that?
Think of the bad jokes.
Haiku # 73210, November 2, 2021 6:08 am ET
by *Ding dong*. Trick or Treat. of What a strange looking candy bar.
Men have chromosomes, but women do not have them.
That's why men give birth.
Haiku # 73209, November 2, 2021 6:07 am ET
by Elementary Biology of Obvious
Men can be mommies.
They give birth AND breastfeed.
Don't deny the truth.
Haiku # 73208, November 2, 2021 6:03 am ET
by Count Kromasones of Transylvania
Numbers one and two:
Darth rolls around in the stuff.
Time to hose him down.
Haiku # 73207, November 2, 2021 5:58 am ET
by Again of Stig Py
If you sleep with Darth
he likes it when you whisper
numbers in his ear
Haiku # 73206, November 2, 2021 5:21 am ET
by Cherry of Pi
Salivation Front:
Lined up, with prayer and Bibles
To spit upon Darth.
Haiku # 73205, November 2, 2021 5:13 am ET
by He Earned the Privilege of Holy Daze Give Thanx
Starvation Army
21 Kettle Salute
Hypocrite Misers!
Haiku # 73204, November 2, 2021 4:12 am ET
by Saliva of Hungry
It is All Saints Day.
The Pope of Rome can kiss off.
He's irrelevant.
Haiku # 73203, November 1, 2021 5:09 pm ET
by St. Martin Luther of Saxony
But it's not abuse.
The dogs seem to enjoy it.
They keep coming back.
Haiku # 73201, November 1, 2021 2:03 pm ET
by Canine happy ending massage service. Treat your pet right! of Dog biscuits and squirell videos included.
Red rocket! Red rocket!
Haiku # 73200, November 1, 2021 1:59 pm ET
by Milking the dog.
It makes me nervous
Imagining the way you
Get dog DNA...
Haiku # 73199, November 1, 2021 1:42 pm ET
by Canine Abuse Support Group
https://linktr.ee/iPhone13GiveawayHOT

iPhone Giveaway 2022
Haiku # 73198, November 1, 2021 5:37 am ET
by belleKak of Andorra
I'm staying in bed
I'm burning up with fever
and freezing cold chills
Haiku # 73197, November 1, 2021 12:49 am ET
by Starkitten
They want a sample
I'm sending dog DNA
Don't tell anyone
Haiku # 73196, November 1, 2021 12:21 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Maybe I already do.
I want to buy a nuclear warhead if you know anyone selling.
Haiku # 73195, October 31, 2021 11:45 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Classic movie scenes
now punctuated with farts.
Save me the aisle seat
Haiku # 73194, October 31, 2021 10:55 pm ET
by Keanu Reeves of The Gastrix
You say that you're bald
You should get math equations
tattooed on your head
Haiku # 73193, October 31, 2021 10:26 pm ET
by Fun
< 50 Less Recent Haiku 50 More Recent Haiku >