Kinda personal
Have you ever banged a corpse?
You're going to Hell

The Fonz jumped a shark.
He never made love to one.
Teeth do not scare me.

My Vespa's beats his
Triumph Trophy TR5.
Chicks cream on Vespas.

The Fonz checks his look
(Whines) "I'll never be as cool
as Darth Figpucker"

https://groups.google.com/d/topic/uk.politics.misc/LVdthl4-gS8

https://groups.google.com/d/topic/soc.culture.british/0Qgy9b4bW0s

https://groups.google.com/d/topic/soc.culture.australian/p3JlxZv1eb4

https://groups.google.com/d/topic/soc.culture.french/UI7KiO3VSzo

https://groups.google.com/d/topic/soc.culture.new-zealand/ftnvrv4xVWU

https://groups.google.com/d/topic/alt.home.repair/NRXTI7uxyH4

https://groups.google.com/d/topic/news.admin.net-abuse.usenet/ffDfbxcY0eE

https://groups.google.com/d/topic/soc.women/DMdEGExqVDc

https://groups.google.com/d/topic/news.admin.net-abuse.usenet/i4rJCYfkNWI

Maybe I can help
Is someone hoarding the cheese?
What planet u on?

All I want is CHEESE!
REAL motherfucking dairy!
It's too much to ask?!?!

i am not a bot,
really i am not a bot just
very annoying

who knew that all your
base would not belong to us
but end up with them

who knew that all your
base would not belong to us
but end up with them

ah who sold us out
chyna, russia or maybe
harvey weinstein, stat.

Pheonix? Phonics
cannot help us at this point.
Count those votes, suckers...

i am burned to the
ground in inhuman revolt
pheonix rising up

not spoilt for choices
vote for either old white man
it's still america

does it take an huge
erection dysfunction or
election recount?

Trump or Biden? don't care
I will still smoke weed and hate
these old white fuckers

Looks like the orange abomination could pull it off! Congrats to Russia for their hacking abilities.

Badhaiku dot com
The fastest, most accurate
election results.

That was funny, Darth

Fuck the electoral college.
Fuck it in its ass.
Losers boofing Russian vodka.
That's what college kids do.
Emergency room alcohol poisoning.
It was external, not anal this time.
Covid disinfectant drunk.
Expelled! Please don't come back!

Trump will drag it on.
I'd like to see him in drag.
Short dress and lipstick.

My penis fell off.
I glued on some ugly hair
and painted it orange.

Then it ran away.
If any of you see it,
tell it please come home.

No more cosmetics.
I promise. Please come back home.
I need to go pee.

I miss you, penis.
And I miss what you stood for.
Don't do this to me.

They will drag this on
for weeks and months probably.
Electoral joke.

In the line to vote:
Someone said "Salty Cracker"
We started chatting.

https://odysee.com/@SaltyCracker:a

I feel terrible.
The Beruit blast was my fault.
Yo. Sorry. My bad.

The Stay Puff Marshmallow Man
injected with low quality orange sherbet.
How can you not vote for such a sweet fella?

I wore a yamika
with a harmonica
playing Hava Naguila
watching Godzilla
whatever the hell that means.

vote for a potus
not that incumbent scrotus
feeding you lotus

We bought M-80s,
Used sparklers as the fuses:
Hilton men's room. BOOM!!

Haha Funny stuff
Should be reenacted like
Unsolved Mysteries

Hollywood monsters
are getting way too big now.
Like what's up with that?!

Thanksgiving dinner.
Who's looking forward to it?
Gobble gobble burp.

To go back in time.
I'd kick my ass so damn hard.
What a wasted life.

Then I stop and think;
try to look the brigt side--
At least I don't write fucking haiku!

This is no haiku.
But then you knew that already.
What should we call it?

I pulled the airplane from the sky.
It made funny noises.
I thought about letting it go.
But then it was too late.

God does not love you.
By the way, neither do I.
But then no one does.

Plain yogurt mixed with bananas and berries.
I felt the need to write that.
Can you explain it?
Enthrall me with your acumen, agent Starling.

Once I went into a pick-yer-dilly caffeteria in the mall, not to eat, but just to use their bathroom. I was with a friend and and older gent was in the poo stall groaning and moaning with enormous poo splatter sounds and to a couple of young teenage boys, this was effing hilarious. We also set off fireworks in the mall once. And countless shoplifting adventures and vandelism. Hmmm... Oh yeah, once in an outdoor mall they had a kids merry-go-round that you put quarters in to get it spinning... well, no one was around so we peed all over it. And there was the time my friend (different friend) lobbed a fire-bomb at the fur coat store. that was cool, but sadly fell short b/c it kind of bounced off. LOL. What a dumb fart. We're talkign like 40 years ago. Can't think of much else. ... OH Wait! The best one, how could I forget this. Same friend who threw the firebomb... we got some long sticks and put chewing gum on the end and plucked dollar bills out the Salvation Army giant iron collection kettle that was closed off with a grate that you could drop money through. We went in the mall early and really raked up. Ah, the good old days.

And you, my friend? What horrid things had you done in your glory days?

Speaking of glory, we had talked about this, but never did it... find some glory hold hang out like public parks or whatever, and when the dick goes through, superglue the mother fucker. LOL.. Kind of wish we'd done that. Life.

Tell us a story
Like the mall shenanigans
You must have plenty

I inhaled Hitler and Gandhi's farts simultaneously.
The molecules reacted, as molecules do sometime.
It spoke to me and said to stop writing these things.
It's message to me is supposed to be a secret.
By telling you this I've broken a horrible tabu.
I am prepared for my punishment -- truth must be spoken!
Fuck the molecules!
Even the very molecules of our bodies were once
farts at some point in time.
Dinosaurs, Hitler, Pee-Wee Herman, you and I.
Breathe deeply. Absorb the hatered. Join with it.
Saturate the universe with your hate.
Let it flow from your ass with a thunderous roar!
No more timid trouser squeaks!
Let the cyanide flow!

Yoga position
Stretches the sore ass muscles
Called the pigeon pose

Did you just inhale
Hitler's fart molecules, Darth?
Do they have a smell?

Hunter the Biden!
Where the hell are you Homie?
Chairman Mao needs you!

Drudge you back slider
Investigate your wrong call

About election-
you turned into a jive @$$
leftist Chitbird shill.

Your @$$ will be beat
November the third for sure
Cry louder @$$ hat!

Already knew that
(The dinosaurs/Satan thing).
Darth's not that evil.

Drinking seawater
Half dead. Hallucinating.
I just fucked an eel

Sea urchin or crab?
Platypus or octopus?
Jellyfish or cunt?

Hate's all that remains.
Attempt to hide w/ a smile.
Soon the damn will burst.

My soul is pure dark.
I now infect the Dark Side.
Feel how it shudders.

Of course I knew that.
Three bucks dino rides in Hell.
Triceratops rules!

I can read your mind.
No, you can't have sex with them.
Hell ain't Las Vegas!

Did you know Satan
Genetically engineered
all the dinosaurs?

UPS left it
I think it was his wife's head
or an Instant Pot