Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 55 Days and 78008 Haiku later...
Yoga position
Stretches the sore ass muscles
Called the pigeon pose
Haiku # 68592 November 2, 2020 10:27 pm ET
by I. Justshitonthesidewalk of Brooklyn Heights, NY
Did you just inhale
Hitler's fart molecules, Darth?
Do they have a smell?
Haiku # 68591 November 2, 2020 9:09 pm ET
by Dinosaur Fart of Breeze
Hunter the Biden!
Where the hell are you Homie?
Chairman Mao needs you!
Haiku # 68589 November 2, 2020 5:15 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Drudge you back slider
Investigate your wrong call

About election-
you turned into a jive @$$
leftist Chitbird shill.

Your @$$ will be beat
November the third for sure
Cry louder @$$ hat!
Haiku # 68588 November 2, 2020 5:10 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Already knew that
(The dinosaurs/Satan thing).
Darth's not that evil.
Haiku # 68587 November 2, 2020 5:04 pm ET
by Whorrendously Tame of Mr. Nice Guy DW
Drinking seawater
Half dead. Hallucinating.
I just fucked an eel
Haiku # 68586 November 2, 2020 1:07 pm ET
by Zippy of Zodiac Inflatable
Sea urchin or crab?
Platypus or octopus?
Jellyfish or cunt?
Haiku # 68585 November 2, 2020 12:59 pm ET
by Observer of At Sea
Hate's all that remains.
Attempt to hide w/ a smile.
Soon the damn will burst.

My soul is pure dark.
I now infect the Dark Side.
Feel how it shudders.
Haiku # 68584 November 2, 2020 9:01 am ET
by Darth Whorendous
Of course I knew that.
Three bucks dino rides in Hell.
Triceratops rules!

I can read your mind.
No, you can't have sex with them.
Hell ain't Las Vegas!
Haiku # 68583 November 2, 2020 8:30 am ET
by dw
Did you know Satan
Genetically engineered
all the dinosaurs?
Haiku # 68582 November 2, 2020 5:02 am ET
by Ask Me of Go ahead, ask me
UPS left it
I think it was his wife's head
or an Instant Pot
Haiku # 68581 November 1, 2020 11:32 pm ET
by Corn Colonel of Aisle seat
That's not the real Darth
This one sounds mean and unhinged
Bring back the real one
Haiku # 68580 November 1, 2020 11:25 pm ET
by In the vicinity of A turkey fucker
I had a bad thought.
They might make turkey balot.
God, what have we done?

We should have let the Japs finish the job.
Funny that after WWII and the all the genocide, the silly filly flippas still go work the brothels in Japan. No attention to history. It's just forgotten. That happens when you don't even care to read.
Haiku # 68579 November 1, 2020 11:05 pm ET
by blahblahblah Trump Biden Bastard Balls
Stuffing the turkey.
Duct tape up the legs and feet
so she can't scratch you.

You got a pocketful of cranberry sauce, or you been banging turkey's again? Christ almighty boy, at least wipe it off when you're done.
Haiku # 68578 November 1, 2020 10:59 pm ET
by Gobble gobble. of Butterball butchering and packaging plant
You may not hate me,
but I hate your stinky cunt.
Abortions and pills.

Smells like rotting pork.
Toxic shock dementia blood.
Runs in your fam'ly.

I love my small dink.
9mm is huge
for my gerbil girls.
Haiku # 68577 November 1, 2020 10:54 pm ET
by Fake Cath-o-lick my balls. of PetSmart
Cock blade in Se7en.
Amazing fucking movie.
What's inside the box?!
Haiku # 68576 November 1, 2020 10:45 pm ET
by He made me wear that thing. And he told me to fuck her! of And I did! I fucked her. (And she was pretty much fucked.)
Premature E-Jac
Study of the effects of
Daylight Savings Time
Haiku # 68575 November 1, 2020 10:10 pm ET
by May I. Speakwithyourwife of Hole made by Ceiling Cat
There's no place for hate
So remove that foolish codpiece
and show us your dink
Haiku # 68574 November 1, 2020 9:20 pm ET
by I. Don'tevenhateyouforyoursmallpenis of Noticer of Details house
Broadway Sensation
All Penis West Side Story
Starring Darth Shankcock
Haiku # 68572 November 1, 2020 2:28 pm ET
by Natalie Would of So would I
I knew Darth was weird,
But wearing blades on his cock?
That is truly FOWL.
Haiku # 68571 November 1, 2020 11:56 am ET
by Cluck Cluck of Cutting Edge Haiku
I'm in quarantine.
No, it isn't for covid.
I got airborne AIDS.

The cock flew at me.
It was armed with a sharp knife.
But I ducked aside.

The cop opened up.
Sprayed blood all over the place.
Airborne HIV.

Those cock blades are like a 2 inch scalpel. Nothing to fuck around with, I'll tell you. If you're not expert in handling those birds, you better stay the hell back. The cop probably thought he was hot shit and tried to get the bird as evidence. Bad move. "He learned his lesson," is the phrase that comes to mind, but logically doesn't work.

Anyway, my advice to you is that any country that has cockfighting, you should probably stay away from. SE Asia, Mexico, Oklahoma, etc. Don't go to those dangerous, crime infested, poverty shit-holes. Trust me!
Haiku # 68570 November 1, 2020 2:03 am ET
by DW of since it's close to thanksgiving, I think it's time to talk about dingleberry pie.
Comatose poets
Low-key Jonestown Massacre
Party Poopers All

I
Haiku # 68569 November 1, 2020 1:51 am ET
by Kool-Aid Pitcher of Busting through wall
Hello, is Darth there?
No, he's busy doing math.
Sigh. Hanging up phone.
Haiku # 68568 October 31, 2020 3:48 am ET
by Your friend of Under old willow
Cock Fighting Rooster
killed the local police chief
In the Philippines

Cock Fighting Rooster
had a tiny ankle blade
He was Hard As Fuck
Haiku # 68567 October 31, 2020 3:44 am ET
by Cock Fancier of Cock Fight (They're fighting over me)
Wrap me in the flag
and fuck me for Old Glory!!
USA! Be Best!
Haiku # 68566 October 31, 2020 2:30 am ET
by Betsy Ross' pincushion (cunt) of USA!!
Any live poets
up in this motherfucker?
Or is it just me?
Haiku # 68565 October 31, 2020 2:19 am ET
by Just Me of Up in this motherfucker
Your whole life is just
a near death experience
so get used to it
Haiku # 68564 October 31, 2020 2:14 am ET
by Drunk of Barstool
Young Ivanka Trump
Daddy let me grind on you
Daddy buy me this
Haiku # 68563 October 30, 2020 9:52 pm ET
by Bride Angel of Elektra Complex
Take a dump on Trump.
Drink some Pump(kin) spice Latte.
Forrest Gump's hump clump.

Jennay... here's what love is!
Splat! in her face!
Haiku # 68562 October 30, 2020 9:41 pm ET
by Ivanka wanka Trump hump.
That was a good show
Aunt Esther was a real hoot
Having the Big One?
Haiku # 68561 October 30, 2020 9:30 pm ET
by La-z-boy of Recliner
Hahahahaha
Hahahahahahaha
Hahahahaha
Haiku # 68560 October 30, 2020 9:26 pm ET
by Hahahahaha of Hahahahahahaha
Chinese communists
Aid and abet Democrats
like Biden and son.
Haiku # 68559 October 30, 2020 8:43 pm ET
by Selling Off of the U.S.A.
Don't bother leaving
a suicide note at all
Let them keep guessing
Haiku # 68558 October 30, 2020 5:11 pm ET
by End of Life Coach of Pep Talk
We won't take your guns
We'll just take all your money
Then you won't need guns
Haiku # 68557 October 30, 2020 2:54 pm ET
by Deep state Jesus
Maximum bullshit
Eating Q crap with a fork
Only four days left
Haiku # 68556 October 30, 2020 2:52 pm ET
by Deep state Jesus
Maximum Psyops:
get ready for the Deep State's
two-party system.
Haiku # 68555 October 30, 2020 1:06 pm ET
by Biden Yer Time to get Trumped
I know it sounds strange
The Barney Miller theme song
makes me want to poop
Haiku # 68554 October 30, 2020 11:30 am ET
by Doo doo doo doo of See ya
reeling in the years
two weeks short of twenty-four
this amazing site
Haiku # 68553 October 30, 2020 6:32 am ET
by ash of persistent contribution
reaming your pumpkin
it's a noble tradition
baby light my fire
Haiku # 68552 October 30, 2020 4:32 am ET
by ash
Butternut squash soup
We can all agree on this
It tastes like vomit
Haiku # 68551 October 30, 2020 3:42 am ET
by Squash Smasher of Where my services are needed
The Mallards migrate
Releasing their dung in flight
Everybody duck
Haiku # 68550 October 30, 2020 3:30 am ET
by Looking up of Shitty Situation
If God didn't want
us to talk about our shit
We'd just have assholes
Haiku # 68549 October 30, 2020 3:24 am ET
by Noticer of Details of Under old willow
Unavoidable
All the poems on this site
are written by GOD
Haiku # 68548 October 30, 2020 3:21 am ET
by Noticer of Details of Haiku Central
let's bidet farewell
scatological reviews
are boring as shit
Haiku # 68547 October 30, 2020 2:06 am ET
by ash
Mega Tootsie Roll
Just in time for Halloween
And there's corn in it
Haiku # 68546 October 30, 2020 1:15 am ET
by Advertisement of Paid Advertisement
Fling it: Darth's poo's large.
I want Darth inside of me.
Go! Poo Humongous!
Haiku # 68545 October 30, 2020 1:04 am ET
by Gonna have to chop this one into pieces to get it to flush.
Sing it: Darth in charge
I want Darth in charge of me
Go, Darth Whorrendous!
Haiku # 68544 October 29, 2020 10:37 pm ET
by What's left of me of You can have it
This is what I do.
When I poo, I poo haiku.
Then throw it at you.

And I do this too,
when writing haiku, it's poo!
Hits the fan and flew.

In lieu of the loo,
under the outhouse will do.
Please enjoy the view.

I've often fantasized about having an outhouse with captive enemies chained under the toilet so I could poo on them and read poetry at them simultaneously.
Oprah, Jerry Springer, Britney Spears, Roseanne, Courtney Love, Hulk Hogan, Bruce Lee's promoter, and every politician on the planet... and some policemen, judges, and criminals as well.
When I get to hell, I know that I will be given a job reading my poetry to sinners. So you better behave yourselves!
Haiku # 68543 October 29, 2020 9:54 pm ET
by Demon Cleaner Bad Poetry and Fecal Spray Gun Service
Walter Wallace: thug.
Got himself ventilated
lunging with a knife.
Haiku # 68542 October 29, 2020 8:37 pm ET
by Thug Lives Do Not Matter
Darth be like: "Bathroom".
Bad Haiku all: "Not dat, yo".
Darth say: "Oh yes y'all."
Haiku # 68541 October 29, 2020 7:42 pm ET
by Discrete Pleasure of Ebonics
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