Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
25 Years, 25 Days and 74195 Haikus later...

iamback is back
and as forward as ever
come blow me... a kiss
Haiku # 67336, April 17, 2020 3:03 am ET
by ash
I like Whorrendous.
After all, I am a whore,
doing math homework.

And whores aren't so bad.
Better than cheap gold-diggers,
lying about love.
Haiku # 67335, April 17, 2020 2:40 am ET
by Hey, at least my lies are obvious and therefore not much of a lie. Know what I mean?
Hey vhs, you might check out the book Rabbi Jesus by Bruce Chilton. I found it to be very insprirational. It made me feel like that was a Jesus I could respect. Give it a try if you ever get into a book store after this damn lock down. Hope you ALL stay virus free. Especially iamback.. I mean, I really like that guy!
Haiku # 67334, April 17, 2020 2:29 am ET
by Darth Tootsalot... I gotta come up with someting better. of Darth... Whorrendous / Debauchus / Apathos / Vulgaro / Pervaricator (play on prevaricator, which means liar)
You don't have much faith
if a haiku destroys it.
"Lack of," "Disturbing."
Haiku # 67333, April 17, 2020 2:15 am ET
by Darth Tootsalot, the Dork Lard (whale penis blubber) of I find your lack of syllables disturbing.
"Moral bankruptcy"?
You should think of it more like
"immoral richness".
Haiku # 67332, April 16, 2020 10:08 pm ET
by Darth Tootsalot of As rich as the stains in my underwear -- plant a garden in there, you could!
i was wondering
when you were going to post
your faith destroying

and evil haikus
for all to see your total
moral bankruptcy
Haiku # 67331, April 16, 2020 7:31 pm ET
by vhs
who's jack? the guy who
runs twitter? he got more than
lucky, he got rich.
Haiku # 67330, April 16, 2020 7:09 pm ET
by vhs of go twitter yourself
Wuhan virus jail
The whole damn Country- lock down.
But convicts get turned loose.
Haiku # 67329, April 16, 2020 6:15 pm ET
by Stir crazy of locked in
A soft rain of leaves
Rippling through the bamboo grove.
Think I'm going to puke.
Haiku # 67328, April 16, 2020 6:12 pm ET
by Nausea of Haiku
Nippress and Ash, many moons ago
got married in a gay Star Wars themed wedding as Darth Gaydar and Storm Pooper. How speshul a day it was with Jan-Ass the Hutt. I hope they have little baby Jawas and lots of dogs and cats
Haiku # 67327, April 16, 2020 5:48 pm ET
by iamback of guess
if you got lucky
but you didn't know you did
then well..jack, you're dead!
Haiku # 67326, April 16, 2020 5:04 pm ET
by scotch of https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1NAUeL0D4SI
the big thing is
we get lucky somtimes and
don't realize how lucky
Haiku # 67325, April 15, 2020 3:18 pm ET
by vhs
the big question is
when does it all end and when
does it all begin?
Haiku # 67324, April 14, 2020 3:44 pm ET
by vhs
Oh i'm just like yeah
I'm all like whatever dude
People be like: NO.
Haiku # 67323, April 13, 2020 8:47 pm ET
by Mikhail Bakhtin of Heteroglossic Disjunctures
God already knows
That the nation won't repent.
He hardened Pharaoh. . .
Haiku # 67322, April 13, 2020 8:23 pm ET
by So What's the Point of it All?
working remotely
with a bored, stir crazy kid
and my monkey mind
Haiku # 67321, April 13, 2020 6:55 pm ET
by scotch of nice day out though
hiding inside all
day on the Internet and
when we go out...what???
Haiku # 67320, April 13, 2020 4:58 pm ET
by vhs
dont you temped me with
no teepee for my bunghole
coornholio LIVES!
Haiku # 67319, April 13, 2020 4:26 pm ET
by vhs
You mean Punata...
Guayaquil or Sucre, no?
Cochabamba? Si?
Haiku # 67318, April 13, 2020 2:31 pm ET
by Just Don't Say TITICACA
well they got potty
mouth, for that no cure, only
soap can treat it well
Haiku # 67317, April 13, 2020 12:30 pm ET
by vhs of frak!
Think we got it bad?
Ecuador/Bolivia
have got it much worse.
Haiku # 67316, April 13, 2020 9:40 am ET
by So Pray and Read Psalm 91 of Atheist Trigger Device
hidden easter eggs
the first one was in a game
called adventure...woo
Haiku # 67315, April 12, 2020 5:07 pm ET
by vhs of https://youtu.be/J3AN3n1MtKM
well liars lie and
df is a liar so
we dont believe you
Haiku # 67314, April 12, 2020 11:37 am ET
by vhs
Easter every day.
Christmas and Thanksgiving too.
Also Passover.
Haiku # 67313, April 12, 2020 2:46 am ET
by Words of Saint Paul
Yes. God DOES hate you.
But He loves me through His son.
Is that not correct?
Haiku # 67312, April 12, 2020 2:43 am ET
by Doctrine of Election
God does not love you.
Even on Easter Sunday.
In fact he hates you.
Haiku # 67311, April 12, 2020 2:29 am ET
by Enjoy your Kosher ham. of chocolate bunnies and tie dye eggs.
Apples to apples
Guns to guns, it should have been
A bow, what the fuck
Haiku # 67310, April 11, 2020 11:48 pm ET
by Line of lines
is that not cute, bjork
just left something for us we
can all enjoy now
Haiku # 67309, April 11, 2020 9:45 pm ET
by vhs
W dzisiejszych czasach Obecnie handel sprzedaż transakcja zakupowa Jest czynnoÅ
Haiku # 67308, April 11, 2020 8:52 pm ET
by PaczkinaWegryquich of Iceland
Hello Netherlands.
If you want we can delete
your signature, yes.
Haiku # 67307, April 11, 2020 8:24 pm ET
by Netherworlds of Doom
once I ate myself.
like one of those squeejum squees.
it wasn't that bad.
Haiku # 67306, April 11, 2020 8:08 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of
Hi :). I am from Netherlands and i don't know how can i disable my signature? Regards :)
Haiku # 67305, April 11, 2020 7:37 pm ET
by belleKak of Netherlands Antilles
i was hoping I'd
post something depressed so some
person could indulge

my masochism
becase we''ve some Marquis
hang out on this site
Haiku # 67304, April 11, 2020 3:02 pm ET
by vhs
ah, bullshit...no planes
crashed to the ground, no cars
crashed, driverless with...

oh that's right, AIs
but other than that i mean
the Rapture seems to

involve watching a
lot of variety shows
on Dish TV box.
Haiku # 67303, April 11, 2020 3:00 pm ET
by vhs
The Rapture happened.
You are left behind with US.
We hope you have fun.
Haiku # 67302, April 11, 2020 2:05 pm ET
by Missed the Celestial Train of Dispensational Madness
suddenly quiet
i want to be gone, i want
the rapture to come
Haiku # 67301, April 11, 2020 12:36 pm ET
by vhs
new day, more stuff post
here usps might go
bye bye, damn end times
Haiku # 67300, April 11, 2020 10:04 am ET
by vhs
white russian, white russ
ian! kahlua kahlua
the dude endureth
Haiku # 67299, April 10, 2020 4:49 pm ET
by vhs
anyhow, you stick to
the vodka for your lemonade
i got my coffee
Haiku # 67298, April 10, 2020 4:41 pm ET
by vhs
you know demons can
be both internal and they
can be literal
Haiku # 67297, April 10, 2020 4:40 pm ET
by vhs
life gives you lemons,
you better make lemonade.
if demons, snort meth
Haiku # 67296, April 10, 2020 3:47 pm ET
by scotch of deep thoughts
another plot twist:
those demons that you're venting?
not demons, just you
Haiku # 67295, April 10, 2020 3:45 pm ET
by scotch of truth
and he who shags pigs
i do not think kosher laws
could cover the bill
Haiku # 67294, April 10, 2020 10:04 am ET
by vhs
san francisco eh?
its snow business like snow business
here in maineland
Haiku # 67293, April 10, 2020 10:03 am ET
by vhs
are there people who
never left bad haiku in
all these years, remained?
Haiku # 67292, April 10, 2020 4:19 am ET
by oedipa of Moxie ain't got nothing on SF
birthday in two days
will bake corona cake to
wash down the virus
Haiku # 67291, April 10, 2020 4:18 am ET
by oedipa of apocalypse in sf
I'm back now, after
witnessing vhs haikus
bad haikus indeed
Haiku # 67290, April 10, 2020 4:16 am ET
by oedipa of black hole realm of the lost things
looks like im going
to have to take authority
ver some demons here
Haiku # 67289, April 10, 2020 12:30 am ET
by vhs
eat yourself
Haiku # 67288, April 10, 2020 12:27 am ET
by vhs
I've eaten some dogs.
Canine meat tastes just like beef.
Like grandma's beef stew.

In all honesty,
I'd rather eat some humans.
Starting with poets.

Hoping things get bad.
Like violence without mercy.
I will feast on souls.
Haiku # 67287, April 9, 2020 4:34 pm ET
by Cannonball Cannibal of Looking for recipes and butchering tips.
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