Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 352 Days and 77336 Haiku later...

san francisco eh?
its snow business like snow business
here in maineland
Haiku # 67293, April 10, 2020 10:03 am ET
by vhs
are there people who
never left bad haiku in
all these years, remained?
Haiku # 67292, April 10, 2020 4:19 am ET
by oedipa of Moxie ain't got nothing on SF
birthday in two days
will bake corona cake to
wash down the virus
Haiku # 67291, April 10, 2020 4:18 am ET
by oedipa of apocalypse in sf
I'm back now, after
witnessing vhs haikus
bad haikus indeed
Haiku # 67290, April 10, 2020 4:16 am ET
by oedipa of black hole realm of the lost things
looks like im going
to have to take authority
ver some demons here
Haiku # 67289, April 10, 2020 12:30 am ET
by vhs
eat yourself
Haiku # 67288, April 10, 2020 12:27 am ET
by vhs
I've eaten some dogs.
Canine meat tastes just like beef.
Like grandma's beef stew.

In all honesty,
I'd rather eat some humans.
Starting with poets.

Hoping things get bad.
Like violence without mercy.
I will feast on souls.
Haiku # 67287, April 9, 2020 4:34 pm ET
by Cannonball Cannibal of Looking for recipes and butchering tips.
i saw snow outside
its april, i'm stuck inside
i look out again
Haiku # 67286, April 9, 2020 4:07 pm ET
by vhs
dogs and cats being
eaten disturb me, i hate
but it is just so
Haiku # 67285, April 9, 2020 2:58 pm ET
by vhs
Just now discovered
This well-done and insightful
Documentary:

https://youtu.be/Le_rfTdayLs
Haiku # 67284, April 9, 2020 4:37 am ET
by Who Won Wuhan?
I was wrong. Sorry.
I just found out its real name:
CCP Virus.
Haiku # 67283, April 9, 2020 4:24 am ET
by Citizens of China Not To Blame
China does not suck
Chicom sons of bitches sure do
If Chinese people

Had weapons right now
Maoist bastards would be toast
Count on it comrade
Haiku # 67282, April 9, 2020 2:20 am ET
by Dead Mao see dung of Communist hell
i dont like being
led down a path where a known
sociopath posts stuff

on here playing games
you only win if you dont play
that s the end of that
Haiku # 67281, April 8, 2020 11:23 pm ET
by vhs
nothing so crude you
ignorant slut, herr pigg, i
argued politics
Haiku # 67280, April 8, 2020 11:18 pm ET
by vhs
Good friend, vhs,
tell use about your revenge.
How did you do it?

Asking for a friend.
Plain good old fashioned murder.
I think that's the key.

Or burn them alive.
Torches and molten sugar.
Give the ants a treat.
Haiku # 67279, April 8, 2020 10:52 pm ET
by blahblahblah
Chineez, Japaneez,
Dirty knees, look at THESE (boing!)
(Then show your titties)
Haiku # 67278, April 8, 2020 10:01 pm ET
by Immortal Poems of Fourth Grade
Here is my haiku.
My magnificent haiku:
"Ching Chong China SUCKS"
Haiku # 67277, April 8, 2020 9:57 pm ET
by Thank you thank you Detroit we love the Motor City thank you
Globalists intend
To wreck our economy:
Corona excuse.
Haiku # 67276, April 8, 2020 9:52 pm ET
by Henry Kissinger of Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation
But seriously
Head of W.H.O.
Is Chinese puppet
Haiku # 67275, April 8, 2020 9:48 pm ET
by Talons of Wen Chiang
Guys: don't shoot up drugs
Or drink too much of that scotch.
Just snort some Haiku
Haiku # 67274, April 8, 2020 9:45 pm ET
by Hai as Haiku of At least It's Meth
Just watched Lost in Space
About the man-hating queen.
Nasty feminist!
Haiku # 67273, April 8, 2020 9:41 pm ET
by Judy of Lost in Space VS. Maryann of G's Island
When I am in Maine
I enjoy some cold Moxie.
Gets my Moxie on.
Haiku # 67272, April 8, 2020 9:37 pm ET
by Gentian Root of Secret Downeast Formula
I wonder if the
guy is going to call himself
Darth SkinwalkerFucker
Haiku # 67271, April 8, 2020 9:10 pm ET
by vhs
oh and SKINWALKERS
in a haiku, will i do
battle with them soon?
Haiku # 67270, April 8, 2020 7:04 pm ET
by vhs
i'm curious what
kind of scotch atheists drink
as to agnostics?
Haiku # 67269, April 8, 2020 6:40 pm ET
by vhs
what sickens me is
at least for a while we can't
walk into empty

k marts
Haiku # 67268, April 8, 2020 4:27 pm ET
by vhs
it's the wind up and
the catch, curve ball to center
field, dead guy talking
Haiku # 67267, April 8, 2020 3:56 pm ET
by vhs
"vhs, moxie:
the twist is they're the same guy"
- m. night shyamalan
Haiku # 67266, April 8, 2020 3:36 pm ET
by scotch of imagining the pitch
new england has a
lot of history to it
so that is valued
Haiku # 67265, April 8, 2020 1:36 pm ET
by vhs
well i am he who
is moxie so, what's the deal
with airline food eh?
Haiku # 67264, April 8, 2020 1:27 pm ET
by vhs
it is how the book
a clockwork orange ended
for real, HE was cured

all right but not by
going back to drencrom but
he just grew up, droogs
Haiku # 67263, April 8, 2020 1:16 pm ET
by vhs
some of us when we
get older just want sweets and
move past the regrets
Haiku # 67262, April 8, 2020 1:12 pm ET
by vhs of play minature golf
i got my hands in
so many fucking pies i
had meat for desert
Haiku # 67261, April 8, 2020 1:12 pm ET
by vhs of apple for lunch
the good thing is it
has evolved into real life
on line friendships eh?
Haiku # 67260, April 8, 2020 1:10 pm ET
by vhs of drink moxie nerve food
I've switched to the
twitter thing so i can say
heckle liberals
Haiku # 67259, April 8, 2020 1:06 pm ET
by vhs
after bugging the
hell out of bdsm
chatrooms, I'm back here
Haiku # 67258, April 8, 2020 1:03 pm ET
by vhs
I'm waiting for the
putdowns, yes i'm game i did
smack a bitch one time...
Haiku # 67257, April 8, 2020 1:02 pm ET
by vhs
i have an angle
a bit of protestant and
a bit of buddhist

so that's my mantra
this life is, then this life is
not, wabi sabi
Haiku # 67256, April 8, 2020 1:00 pm ET
by vhs
some of us grow bored
with a certain kind of life
and become boring

that's ok with me
Haiku # 67255, April 8, 2020 12:58 pm ET
by vhs
I went through my i
hate myself phase years ago
now i seek revenge
Haiku # 67254, April 8, 2020 12:56 pm ET
by vhs
i heard about old
fear and loathing, mark dice said
some rumors of bad

nature behind the
man, criminal beyond bad
exploded ashes.
Haiku # 67253, April 8, 2020 12:55 pm ET
by vhs
My daughter said that
if my sense of humore was
darker that it would

pick cotton.
Haiku # 67252, April 8, 2020 10:34 am ET
by should I be worried?
The definition
of dork is a whale's cock.
Dork Lard is blubber!

Penile blubber.
Dolphins have prehensile cocks.
They're laughing at us.
Haiku # 67251, April 8, 2020 10:32 am ET
by At least it's not meth. of Not yet anyway.
I'm say to say that
I have never tried cocaine.
I want LSD.
Haiku # 67250, April 8, 2020 9:01 am ET
by LSD and coke together. of That is what I need right now.
Crusty underwear.
The world is falling apart.
Jesus, pass the meth!
Haiku # 67249, April 8, 2020 8:59 am ET
by I'll rather kill myself. of It's more fun that way. Hunter knew.
Return of Dork Lard:
Tremble before his methane!
(Poetic methane.)
Haiku # 67248, April 8, 2020 8:17 am ET
by Lard of God's Frying Pan
Let the vomit flow.
From virus or poetry.
Bloody chunks of hate.
Haiku # 67247, April 8, 2020 3:04 am ET
by Darth Tootsalot of I'm not just sure, I'm corona positive!
Did you cum in me?!
What if I become pregnant?!
All up in my ass?!
Haiku # 67246, April 7, 2020 9:36 pm ET
by Darth Tootsalot's ladyboy loverlover. of Pataya Thailand
So I have returned.
And you fuckers run and hide.
Am I that stinky?
Haiku # 67245, April 7, 2020 7:13 pm ET
by Darth Tootsalot of Panic Buying Bean-O at WalMart
I boofed some Pine-sol.
Air freshener flatulence.
vhs approves.
Haiku # 67244, April 7, 2020 7:11 pm ET
by My name is Stinky Politician of Nowhere, Alabama, and I approve this message.
< 50 Less Recent Haiku 50 More Recent Haiku >