Well consarn it Clem,
pass that moonshine over here
and let's git cloggin' !
by Old Guy on his Porch of Great Smoky Mountains
Nach der sich mit der
Das liegt an der Grenze zum
Das liegt an der
by Nach dem uppen of Undisclosed
Well that's ironic.
Therapist or the rapist.
Better watch your gap.
by The ghost of Ted Bundy's underwear collection.
I was a rapist.
Then I became a poet.
Far more invasive.
Feel my words in you.
Oh how they pound in your head.
Now get therapy.
by
The next president
Should be a severed penis
Kept in a glass jar
by C. YA of On erection day
You, sir, ARE old cheese.
Go on over to Iran.
Take your guns with you.
You'll likely succeed
and become their new ruler.
Oil billionaire.
by
Though these poems suck,
they are not "slam poetry".
That shit's hideous.
by df
I smell like old cheese
I demand war with Iran
I smell like old cheese
by John Bolton's Mustache
He who masturbates
eighteen times every day...
Hold on, be right back.
by
I replaced my cum
With battery acid once
And burned my wife's mouth
by Tragic sense of humour
Autumn upon us
Fallen leaves hide soft dung
Warm coils, steam rises
by Trudging along of Undisclosed location
I cannot decide.
What's more sexy about Trump,
his ass or his mouth.
by Deliverance Hillbilly of A good reason to vote for Trump.
Wait, that was the speech
Now I recognize the guy
Yuge back end of Trump
by Noticer of Details of Undisclosed
An important speech
Punctuated by loud farts
Abruptly canceled
by Walkin Funny of Undisclosed
Throw away your pills
Kittens and Cats videos
Your health is restored
by Felix Toebeans of Under old willow
White socks with flip flops
Keeping Up With The
Pacific Northwest
by Shoe Fetish of Undisclosed
The wet grass whispered
I'll ruin your shoes, you bastard
That's just what happened
by Trudging along bastard of Wet grass
Whispered words foster
Your thoughts and desires captured
Package On the Way!
by Ledge of Kentucky
Mexican corn dogs
rained over London last night
while clowns ate sushi.
by I don't know why.
You need to get laid.
But I need to get laid too.
Let's fuck each other.
by Fag of Public park bathroom.
I am so happy.
I just killed a mosquito.
Fucking parasites!
by df
I spilled some acid.
The grass achieved sentience.
So I imagine.
The grass spoke to me.
It said vote for Donald Trump.
Perhaps I was wrong.
But I understand.
Grass doesn't like Mexicans.
And can you blame it.
by Tripping on acid on grass at the park and that friend of yours had sexual relations with your mom when you weren't home.
I went to the park
and smoked some grass with your friend.
We're glad you weren't there.
by I've got the munchies!
Homosexual.
I grassed your friend at the park.
Elmo in Grouchland.
by
I parked on your friend
to comfort the morning grass.
Not one person cared.
by Anonymous Poet
You parked in the grass
Now the windows are steamed up
Get a room next time
by Irate Homeowner of Behind binoculars
I parked in the grass
To comfort my mourning friend
He was mad at me
by Line of lines
Even the pussy
Of a vegetarian
Can taste quite meaty
by Cunnilingual cuisine
Or you can rob banks.
Throw spaghetti at strangers.
Torture small insects.
You don't have to wank.
Just turn off the fucking phone!
Reconnect with trees.
by Anonymous Poet
Worship any God
Because it doesn't matter
Pray to Hulk Hogan
by Anonymous Poet
When you get real sick
Does the praying make you well
Or maybe doctors?
by Jesus is lard
Jimmy junior lies
His daddy wouldn't care one bit
He lied all the time
by Anonymous Poet
Well, you did make sense.
except about "go outside and..."
(You great wanker you.)
by Wankel Rotary Engine of One Piston Misfiring
Which do you hate more,
poets or their poetry?
Or fifty-fifty?
by Burn all Poetry!
Go ahead, pollute!
The faster the earth is gone,
we'll be in heaven.
by Except for gays an poets. of They burn in hell forever.
Regardless if climate change is real or not, less pollution is a good thing. There are just too many people putting a strain on the planet for electricity, fuel, food, etc. Live simply, live clean, turn off the computer, go outside and masturbate. Do not be ashamed, start a new movement.
by
I could not care less
about so-called climate change.
That's YOUR religion.
I'm not interested
in your fake apocalypse.
You need to get saved.
You substituted
this silly theory of doom
for Faith and true Hope.
by Need a Religion of Urgency and Lies
God the Holy Lord.
He gives you every heartbeat.
Repent and seek Him.
by It's not Over of Fat Lady Singing
Piss molten lava.
Shit thermonuclear bombs.
Drink imported beer.
by
r'(t) = (dx/dt)i + (dy/dt)j + (dz/dt)k
Because your penis is small.
Snufflupagus.
by Do you think The Count has a thing against irrational numbers?
So which one is worse,
if a person cannot read,
or can, but does not?
by df
If you have the clap
orgasms are more intense.
Go and share the joy.
by Satan's supervisor.
God is not happy.
He's not been since you were born.
Kill yourself today.
by Enjoying a goat milk cappuccino in the back of a low class Asian whorehouse.
For a good time call...
We went to the fair, skating,
and then a concert.
by Glad I called that number.
Am I missing out?
I never use the restroom.
Yes, I'm full of shit.
by Literally or figuratively?
Be a bug hunter.
A promiscuous person
who wants STDs.
Share it with your spouse.
But you must keep it secret.
Prolong the surprise.
You can die smiling,
twisted grin across your face,
just like the Joker.
by Sharing is Caring
I saw your number
Written on the bathroom wall
Show me a good time
by Restroom goer of Restroom
Simplify your life
Just eat until you explode
Get it over with
by Face Filler of Trough
The problem with math
Is all those numbers they have
So many problems
by Math student of Undisclosed
Heaven heaven God
The Lord's Kingdom of Heaven
Jesus Christ judgement
by A Backslidden Atheist of Tourette Syndrome
