BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
22 Years
279 Days
and
65603 Haikus
later...
Your paid big money
To chase a fooking foot ball
Millions of green back

But you are oppressed
And hate America
Cry baby @$$ hat!
Haiku #65313, by Rolang of howthehellIknow
July 14, 2019 6:21 am ET

Noisy bastardo's
Barking fooking GD dogs
No muffler chit cars

yowling stupid chit
Slamming fooking condo doors
Running power tools

American clods
Making noise like circus seals
Please shut the fuck up
Haiku #65312, by Rolang of howthehellIknow
July 14, 2019 6:13 am ET

Treasure your fat wife
And tell that other poet
To stop cry whining
Haiku #65311, by Advice
July 14, 2019 3:30 am ET

What is religion?
God almighty obsession
Can quit any time
Haiku #65310, by Stalking Jeezus
July 13, 2019 11:55 pm ET

What a vile dimwit:
projecting your obsessions
on the rest of us.
Haiku #65309, by Be Saved or Be Damned
July 13, 2019 10:36 pm ET

My brethren poets.
Always lend a helping hand.
Inspirational!
Haiku #65308, by Anonymous Poet
July 13, 2019 9:50 pm ET

Which nose doth thou blow?
Up above or down below?
I might be of help
Haiku #65307, by Helpful
July 13, 2019 6:24 pm ET

We can put a man
on the moon but we cannot
write a good haiku.

A head full of snot.
Feeling weak and itchy throat.
Damn I hate the flu.
Haiku #65306, by Anonymous Poet
July 13, 2019 6:05 pm ET

Your weekend update
No plans for the evening. ..Sigh
This zit ruined my life!
Haiku #65305, by Too embarrassed to say of Hiding
July 13, 2019 4:54 pm ET

Such an awesome time
Nude rollerblading all day
American Tour
Haiku #65304, by All 50 states of Will see my rear end
July 13, 2019 1:40 am ET

The high diving board
Is it dangerous to dive
With an erection

Overcooked hot dogs
Sometimes split down the middle
Quite frankly, I m scared
Haiku #65303, by Frank of Pool
July 13, 2019 12:28 am ET

lmao
Haiku #65302, by vhs of you are an inconvenience!
July 12, 2019 10:42 pm ET

Your lame poetry
makes me hate myself much less.
Thank God I'm not you!
Haiku #65301, by Anonymous Poet
July 12, 2019 10:38 pm ET

Adolph Hitler called.
Yep, a collect call from hell.
He said I'm evil.
Haiku #65300, by Anonymous Poet
July 12, 2019 10:36 pm ET

Holding YOUR photo
Jizzing on your bad poems
Why my pants are down
Haiku #65299, by Grandpa of Porch glider
July 12, 2019 10:31 pm ET

Grandpa's pants are down
for YOU, every time, it seems.
Is that why you're nuts?
Haiku #65298, by Extended Family Values of the Condemned
July 12, 2019 9:59 pm ET

Next time God smotes ya
Look up in the sky and ask
Fuck s your problem,Dude?
Haiku #65297, by Created of In his gnarly image
July 12, 2019 9:57 pm ET

Every single time
I go to visit Grandpa
He s got his pants down
Haiku #65296, by Ding Dong of Door
July 12, 2019 9:55 pm ET

another day goes
by, I am still here, and the
time comes when i go.
Haiku #65295, by vhs
July 12, 2019 8:01 pm ET

Popular Science
Gross! Pages stuck together..
Poetry Robot
Haiku #65294, by Look into my eyes
July 12, 2019 1:22 pm ET

Oh Redundant One
Let me help you hate yourself
in perfect Haiku
Haiku #65293, by Haiku Intervention for Free
July 12, 2019 9:28 am ET

I think I need some goddamn waves... seriously.
Damn the fat wife and family... they are better off without me. I need to be eaten by a great white or bash out what little is left of my brain on a reef... fucking waves punish me over and over, pummeling, pounding, humiliating me and I love them more than life itself, goddamn it and I cannot deny what I am, just downright rotten bastard piece of selfish shit and I offer no apologies. I know what I need. Fuck. I hate myself, but that's okay.
Haiku #65292, by Anonymous Poet
July 12, 2019 3:45 am ET

I know about rage.
I've come to quite enjoy it.
Therefore I am Darth.

Sadly, there's no Force.
If there were, I'd be like God.
Rage, hatred, and greed.

I've become evil.
And I do not regret it.
I am a monster.

Too many wedgies
I'd gotten in middle school.
Oh the tragedy.
Haiku #65291, by True evil is born, not made. of LOL and all that.
July 12, 2019 3:38 am ET

no rest for the wicked
evil thoughts consume me for
eternity becons my spirit

to hellfire, just my luck
im thrown i to the frying
pan instead at work
Haiku #65290, by vhs
July 12, 2019 3:31 am ET

why cannot todats
youth just shut the fuck up and
enjoy the coachella

air and the transgender fetish
futa all that, thats all it is
wear a skirt, get the girl
Haiku #65289, by vhs
July 12, 2019 3:29 am ET

i want to let go
of the past my undereyes
black with the weight

of percieved failure
yearsnhere busted dead or
alive my own fault
Haiku #65288, by vhs
July 12, 2019 3:28 am ET

there are professors
i still feel rage at, long gone
i wanted to just

enjoy art, i stll
want to give the long dead a
boot to the rear end
Haiku #65287, by vhs
July 12, 2019 3:26 am ET

restless these four walls
restless yesterday writing
is a sickness yes

this is the pus, the
poison, the infection comes
out on these pages
Haiku #65286, by vhs
July 12, 2019 3:24 am ET

a wall of ice and
more ice builds up inside i
literal zombie
Haiku #65285, by vhs
July 12, 2019 3:22 am ET

i cannot sleep, i
had no rest over this place on
yesterday...goodbye
Haiku #65284, by vhs
July 12, 2019 3:14 am ET

just shut up they said
shrugs, it became no fun when
he just kept going
Haiku #65283, by vhs
July 12, 2019 3:12 am ET

some dsy we will all
realize weve forgotten of
these places, and

we play chess at noon
at the coffee house, say screw
the evil liberal menace

to the barrista
oh thats just vhs
Haiku #65282, by vhs
July 12, 2019 3:11 am ET

i get wound up and
i am rough on myself now
imagine putting

interbalizing this stuff
in real life at work, thinking
overthing, indigestion
Haiku #65281, by vhs
July 12, 2019 3:09 am ET

just i cant quite sleep
at not quite an old age but
not young anymore
Haiku #65280, by vhs
July 12, 2019 3:07 am ET

i dont think you want
to know why i have been up
blood in the sheets then

not much. just you know
what if i turn into someone
who really talks about

injuries, but this
was from the gym, pulled a
shoulder, hemmeroids

im getting older
and fuck the new green desl
farying cows? i pray

for that lady
Haiku #65279, by vhs
July 12, 2019 3:04 am ET

people would know i
was gone but theyd no idea
it was this old place

there is joy in things
left behind when a troll
devours itself

we have all been one
the dreamers, the self harm
shove the wine bottle

up 'his' ass, art

painted in toxic words

that have no meaning behind wslls
Haiku #65278, by vhs
July 12, 2019 3:02 am ET

Been up all night?
Go to bed, men our age need lots of rest. And teenage prostitutes, but that's another thing.
Haiku #65277, by Anonymous Poet
July 12, 2019 3:01 am ET

Maybe he's "iamback".
W00t w00t and gravity bong a fifth of Jim Beam with ICP blaring in the background.
Haiku #65276, by Anonymous Poet
July 12, 2019 2:59 am ET

hah, if i offed myself
over this place then youd know
that it is over

for me, no moving
on, no one like that cares, they
troll a dead person
Haiku #65275, by vhs
July 12, 2019 2:58 am ET

The funny thing is...
Maybe he's me, maybe you.
And no one will know.
Haiku #65274, by Oh, the agony! of Maybe he's Janis.
July 12, 2019 2:56 am ET

you get what you put
into it, leave it be, i want
it to be around

i was considering
what it would be like to off
myself over this

place, thats how bad my mood
was yesterday
Haiku #65273, by vhs
July 12, 2019 2:55 am ET

vhs, the man is a "professional" troll... I childish nerd. He lives for pissing you off and he's kicking back with glass of wine savoring how he's angered you.
South Part kind of did a series of shows on internet trolling. They love this stuff. The only way to combat them is just realize what they are and laugh at them. Not with, at.
Haiku #65272, by Anonymous Poet
July 12, 2019 2:54 am ET

Yes, it is indeed
a toxic viper pit that
needs to be filled in.

Get the bulldozers.
And seven more silly bulls.
And a matador.

spearing bovines
top quality kobe beef
I'd like mine rare please
Haiku #65271, by rare and bloody
July 12, 2019 2:51 am ET

so seriously
you who call a man clueless
behind a wall you go

wailing and gnashing of teeth
that sort of thing
getting ready to cut things out of my life here
Haiku #65270, by Anonymous Poet
July 12, 2019 2:51 am ET

who gives a crap, the
thing is if a place is toxic
time to move on
Haiku #65269, by vhs
July 12, 2019 2:44 am ET

All accusations
made against me are more than
likely to be true.
Haiku #65268, by Anonymous Poet
July 12, 2019 2:43 am ET

i took it to heart
felt nervous in real life, heart
felt like it would blow

over this place, stuck in
amber, moods, stuck in time poof
what is the whole point
Haiku #65267, by vhs
July 12, 2019 2:41 am ET

frustration projects
sometimes it becomes the urge
to control, accuse

mccarthy trials, dead from drink
in 1957
Haiku #65266, by vhs
July 12, 2019 2:38 am ET

shrugs, words on a screen
accusations, left behind then
what, its all a dream
Haiku #65265, by fuggetaboutit
July 12, 2019 2:36 am ET

Goddman dope made me want ice cream... sigh.
Haiku #65264, by Anonymous Poet
July 12, 2019 2:16 am ET