BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
23 Years
240 Days
and
67701 Haikus
later...
Great food and service
No pubic hairs in my food
Wash hands after poop
Haiku #65077, by In business of Still
June 28, 2019 4:43 am ET

Religious hatred
Bad counting and grammar skills
You are a mess son
Haiku #65076, by Hamster ramp
June 28, 2019 2:23 am ET

Jerry Falwell sucks
And his son sucks even worse
Too bad Jesus is not real

He would smite those shits
And most other Christians too
They all full of shit
Haiku #65075, by Jesus is lard
June 28, 2019 12:03 am ET

Good ol monkeyshines
Unskinny banana bop
Fling poop. She comes back
Haiku #65074, by Society for overly friendly monkeys of With enormous genitalia
June 27, 2019 2:24 am ET

I'm getting divorced.
My wife caught me watching porn.
So it had monkeys!

It's really that bad?!
They seemed to rather like it.
The furry fuck balls.
Haiku #65073, by Anonymous Poet
June 27, 2019 1:54 am ET

Man builds house for wife
Pumps life's savings in project
Proud of erection
Haiku #65072, by Charles Mansion of Home Sweet Home
June 26, 2019 5:49 pm ET

Becept for the curds
Swami Rashashamundo
Build up dink muscles
Haiku #65071, by Pro Teen of Shake Shack
June 26, 2019 4:59 pm ET

If god sucked my dick
Would he swallow all my cum
Just like jesus does
Haiku #65070, by Praise jesus
June 26, 2019 4:44 pm ET

Who is Pat Sajak?
One of your floor-shining friends
(Like Kojack headshine) ?
Haiku #65069, by Jack of Aces
June 26, 2019 1:39 pm ET

Blowing Pat Sajak
Anything for a vowel
Such a shiny floor
Haiku #65068, by Faith of Dirty Knees
June 26, 2019 11:46 am ET

In twelve syllables
The Wicked shall be vanquished
and Faith rewarded
Haiku #65067, by Evidence of Things Unseen
June 26, 2019 11:38 am ET

One man talent show
Carefully unzipping fly
Showing you my dink
Haiku #65066, by I. Gavemyself of A standing ovation
June 26, 2019 3:34 am ET

I am not a male
I am not female, I am...
An attack helicopter
Haiku #65065, by Millennial of College
June 25, 2019 9:02 pm ET

Hoping for the best
Last time I stuck my head there
It was quite smelly
Haiku #65064, by Daredevil
June 25, 2019 12:49 am ET

You don't understand.
That was just dry sarcasm.
Desiccated toast.
Haiku #65063, by Anonymous Poet
June 24, 2019 6:20 pm ET

Under old willow
Open kimono display
Teabag Festival
Haiku #65062, by Origasmi
June 24, 2019 4:25 pm ET

Hidden rotten cheese
Unsolved smegma mystery
Clues lead to your door
Haiku #65061, by Short of Road
June 24, 2019 2:54 pm ET

Congratulations!
And they hired you on the spot!
Dildo Factory
Haiku #65060, by Dong
June 24, 2019 2:51 pm ET

A breath of fresh air.
Something other than that slop
From Farth Digpucker !
Haiku #65059, by O Joyous Day !
June 24, 2019 12:34 pm ET

The bank feeder line
is a much more efficient
waiting procedure.
Haiku #65058, by Anonymous Poet
June 24, 2019 8:58 am ET

He just wanted love.
They all wanted his body.
So he become fat.
Haiku #65057, by Anonymous Poet
June 24, 2019 8:54 am ET

You need more money.
Go earn one million dollars.
It won't be enough.
Haiku #65056, by Anonymous Poet
June 24, 2019 8:51 am ET

She painted pictures.
But no one knew what they were.
Strangely, nor did she.
Haiku #65055, by Anonymous Poet
June 24, 2019 8:49 am ET

Never cheat in school.
Try your best to learn it all.
Even the dull stuff.
Haiku #65054, by Anonymous Poet
June 24, 2019 8:48 am ET

It is all a lie!
Well, except that part about...
well, I think you know.
Haiku #65053, by Anonymous Poet
June 24, 2019 8:44 am ET

Microscopic proof
Debris under fingernails
Leads us to your dink
Haiku #65052, by Miranda Rights of Conjugal visit with your hand
June 23, 2019 7:03 am ET

I do not love you.
In fact, I think I hate you.
Let's get a divorce.
Haiku #65051, by http://www.orr-law.com/ of Newark, NJ
June 23, 2019 5:50 am ET

Mouthwash means brainwash.
Sex-brain is brain down the drain.
Drain leads to Darth's soul.
Haiku #65050, by Old Hermit of Mountain
June 23, 2019 12:43 am ET

Please, I need mouthwash.
Just a little more sweet jizz!
Like flowers blooming.

I sound like Chewie!
Now kiss me, Princess Leia.
Taste the Nerfherder.
Haiku #65049, by Grahrgleglegsslllararrrl of Gulp.
June 23, 2019 12:34 am ET

If you fuck a goat
while a donkey's fucking you,
that's multitasking!
Haiku #65048, by Darth Figpucker
June 23, 2019 12:29 am ET

Peter Dinklage s Dong
Stands erect in my garden
Superb garden gnome
Haiku #65047, by Tremendous of Tremendous
June 23, 2019 12:17 am ET

Some define Haiku
as depicting Nature's peace.
I say fuck that shit...
Haiku #65046, by Earth-Mother is Overrated
June 22, 2019 8:44 pm ET

Intimidating
Approaching the urinal
His ding dong shrivels
Haiku #65045, by Now watch me pee of Now watch me nay nay
June 22, 2019 5:59 pm ET

Pull on your ding dong
Like that old Hunchback in France
Ringing the church bells
Haiku #65044, by Batty of Belfry
June 22, 2019 5:08 pm ET

Darth keeps telling me
to jerk off yet one more time...
but not enough jizz.
Haiku #65043, by Prostatic Problems of Seminal Importance
June 22, 2019 2:07 pm ET

Led Zeppelin rocks!
It's "In My Time of Dying"
that reveals the Christ.
Haiku #65042, by Bonzo's Bass Drum's Mother-in-Law of Slide Guitar
June 22, 2019 2:04 pm ET

Attention poets
If my poems arouse you
Feel free to jerk off
Haiku #65041, by Pull five times. Stop. Pull 7 times of Pull 5 more times
June 22, 2019 12:21 pm ET

Now available
Octopus ejaculate
Undersea kefir
Haiku #65040, by Clam Molester of Take a guess
June 22, 2019 9:55 am ET

Australian outback
I m boofing a kangaroo
Dink didgeridoo
Haiku #65039, by Spunk
June 22, 2019 9:52 am ET

Australian outback
I
Haiku #65038, by Spunk
June 22, 2019 9:52 am ET

lifted up gods skirt
And saw satans vagina
jacked off with jesus
Haiku #65037, by I'm a child of divorce give me a break
June 22, 2019 9:03 am ET

Sifting through junk mail
I came across your letter
Now the ink is smeared
Haiku #65036, by Messy
June 22, 2019 2:11 am ET

The wedding is off
Cancel my subscription too
Ball Cheese of the Month
Haiku #65035, by Shamegamah O of Cork
June 22, 2019 2:09 am ET

Take off all your clothes
Now assume the position
5,4,3,2,1....
Haiku #65034, by Liftoff of To the Moon on the end of my shoe
June 22, 2019 2:05 am ET

Crazy Italians
Lugging around big noses
Wooden spoon bitch slap
Haiku #65033, by What of Church
June 22, 2019 2:02 am ET

"Whoop" ????
Just what in the fuck is that supposed to be?!
Are you a juggalo?
boofing Jim Beam?
Peeling off syphilis scab?
Eating them like beef jerky?
Slim Jim and Colt 45.
Haiku #65032, by BifurcatingPoo
June 22, 2019 1:38 am ET

A fancy gift box
Inside: A gooey old dink
Walt Whitman s Sampler
Haiku #65031, by Poet of Know it
June 21, 2019 11:33 pm ET

Billy Nippress reads Walt Whitman as Ash weeps in the corner wearing his Union Jack Speedo. Both with heavy hearts contemplating their StarWars themed wedding of over a decade ago......
Haiku #65030, by Iamback
June 21, 2019 5:09 pm ET

Ash and Nippress......little mistress, eating curds and whey...... Starwars wedding with Jawa peoples.....pooples dooples...Jabba The Janet......whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop
Haiku #65029, by Iamback
June 21, 2019 5:03 pm ET

watched from a distance
Illusion of slow motion
I watch you disrobe
Haiku #65028, by Peeping Tom of Jerking off in haste and in your bushes
June 21, 2019 4:46 pm ET