BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
23 Years
342 Days
68424 Haikus
Man builds house for wife
Pumps life's savings in project
Proud of erection
Haiku #65072, by Charles Mansion of Home Sweet Home
June 26, 2019 5:49 pm ET

Becept for the curds
Swami Rashashamundo
Build up dink muscles
Haiku #65071, by Pro Teen of Shake Shack
June 26, 2019 4:59 pm ET

If god sucked my dick
Would he swallow all my cum
Just like jesus does
Haiku #65070, by Praise jesus
June 26, 2019 4:44 pm ET

Who is Pat Sajak?
One of your floor-shining friends
(Like Kojack headshine) ?
Haiku #65069, by Jack of Aces
June 26, 2019 1:39 pm ET

Blowing Pat Sajak
Anything for a vowel
Such a shiny floor
Haiku #65068, by Faith of Dirty Knees
June 26, 2019 11:46 am ET

In twelve syllables
The Wicked shall be vanquished
and Faith rewarded
Haiku #65067, by Evidence of Things Unseen
June 26, 2019 11:38 am ET

One man talent show
Carefully unzipping fly
Showing you my dink
Haiku #65066, by I. Gavemyself of A standing ovation
June 26, 2019 3:34 am ET

I am not a male
I am not female, I am...
An attack helicopter
Haiku #65065, by Millennial of College
June 25, 2019 9:02 pm ET

Hoping for the best
Last time I stuck my head there
It was quite smelly
Haiku #65064, by Daredevil
June 25, 2019 12:49 am ET

You don't understand.
That was just dry sarcasm.
Desiccated toast.
Haiku #65063, by Anonymous Poet
June 24, 2019 6:20 pm ET

Under old willow
Open kimono display
Teabag Festival
Haiku #65062, by Origasmi
June 24, 2019 4:25 pm ET

Hidden rotten cheese
Unsolved smegma mystery
Clues lead to your door
Haiku #65061, by Short of Road
June 24, 2019 2:54 pm ET

And they hired you on the spot!
Dildo Factory
Haiku #65060, by Dong
June 24, 2019 2:51 pm ET

A breath of fresh air.
Something other than that slop
From Farth Digpucker !
Haiku #65059, by O Joyous Day !
June 24, 2019 12:34 pm ET

The bank feeder line
is a much more efficient
waiting procedure.
Haiku #65058, by Anonymous Poet
June 24, 2019 8:58 am ET

He just wanted love.
They all wanted his body.
So he become fat.
Haiku #65057, by Anonymous Poet
June 24, 2019 8:54 am ET

You need more money.
Go earn one million dollars.
It won't be enough.
Haiku #65056, by Anonymous Poet
June 24, 2019 8:51 am ET

She painted pictures.
But no one knew what they were.
Strangely, nor did she.
Haiku #65055, by Anonymous Poet
June 24, 2019 8:49 am ET

Never cheat in school.
Try your best to learn it all.
Even the dull stuff.
Haiku #65054, by Anonymous Poet
June 24, 2019 8:48 am ET

It is all a lie!
Well, except that part about...
well, I think you know.
Haiku #65053, by Anonymous Poet
June 24, 2019 8:44 am ET

Microscopic proof
Debris under fingernails
Leads us to your dink
Haiku #65052, by Miranda Rights of Conjugal visit with your hand
June 23, 2019 7:03 am ET

I do not love you.
In fact, I think I hate you.
Let's get a divorce.
Haiku #65051, by of Newark, NJ
June 23, 2019 5:50 am ET

Mouthwash means brainwash.
Sex-brain is brain down the drain.
Drain leads to Darth's soul.
Haiku #65050, by Old Hermit of Mountain
June 23, 2019 12:43 am ET

Please, I need mouthwash.
Just a little more sweet jizz!
Like flowers blooming.

I sound like Chewie!
Now kiss me, Princess Leia.
Taste the Nerfherder.
Haiku #65049, by Grahrgleglegsslllararrrl of Gulp.
June 23, 2019 12:34 am ET

If you fuck a goat
while a donkey's fucking you,
that's multitasking!
Haiku #65048, by Darth Figpucker
June 23, 2019 12:29 am ET

Peter Dinklage s Dong
Stands erect in my garden
Superb garden gnome
Haiku #65047, by Tremendous of Tremendous
June 23, 2019 12:17 am ET

Some define Haiku
as depicting Nature's peace.
I say fuck that shit...
Haiku #65046, by Earth-Mother is Overrated
June 22, 2019 8:44 pm ET

Approaching the urinal
His ding dong shrivels
Haiku #65045, by Now watch me pee of Now watch me nay nay
June 22, 2019 5:59 pm ET

Pull on your ding dong
Like that old Hunchback in France
Ringing the church bells
Haiku #65044, by Batty of Belfry
June 22, 2019 5:08 pm ET

Darth keeps telling me
to jerk off yet one more time...
but not enough jizz.
Haiku #65043, by Prostatic Problems of Seminal Importance
June 22, 2019 2:07 pm ET

Led Zeppelin rocks!
It's "In My Time of Dying"
that reveals the Christ.
Haiku #65042, by Bonzo's Bass Drum's Mother-in-Law of Slide Guitar
June 22, 2019 2:04 pm ET

Attention poets
If my poems arouse you
Feel free to jerk off
Haiku #65041, by Pull five times. Stop. Pull 7 times of Pull 5 more times
June 22, 2019 12:21 pm ET

Now available
Octopus ejaculate
Undersea kefir
Haiku #65040, by Clam Molester of Take a guess
June 22, 2019 9:55 am ET

Australian outback
I m boofing a kangaroo
Dink didgeridoo
Haiku #65039, by Spunk
June 22, 2019 9:52 am ET

Australian outback
Haiku #65038, by Spunk
June 22, 2019 9:52 am ET

lifted up gods skirt
And saw satans vagina
jacked off with jesus
Haiku #65037, by I'm a child of divorce give me a break
June 22, 2019 9:03 am ET

Sifting through junk mail
I came across your letter
Now the ink is smeared
Haiku #65036, by Messy
June 22, 2019 2:11 am ET

The wedding is off
Cancel my subscription too
Ball Cheese of the Month
Haiku #65035, by Shamegamah O of Cork
June 22, 2019 2:09 am ET

Take off all your clothes
Now assume the position
Haiku #65034, by Liftoff of To the Moon on the end of my shoe
June 22, 2019 2:05 am ET

Crazy Italians
Lugging around big noses
Wooden spoon bitch slap
Haiku #65033, by What of Church
June 22, 2019 2:02 am ET

"Whoop" ????
Just what in the fuck is that supposed to be?!
Are you a juggalo?
boofing Jim Beam?
Peeling off syphilis scab?
Eating them like beef jerky?
Slim Jim and Colt 45.
Haiku #65032, by BifurcatingPoo
June 22, 2019 1:38 am ET

A fancy gift box
Inside: A gooey old dink
Walt Whitman s Sampler
Haiku #65031, by Poet of Know it
June 21, 2019 11:33 pm ET

Billy Nippress reads Walt Whitman as Ash weeps in the corner wearing his Union Jack Speedo. Both with heavy hearts contemplating their StarWars themed wedding of over a decade ago......
Haiku #65030, by Iamback
June 21, 2019 5:09 pm ET

Ash and Nippress......little mistress, eating curds and whey...... Starwars wedding with Jawa peoples.....pooples dooples...Jabba The Janet......whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop
Haiku #65029, by Iamback
June 21, 2019 5:03 pm ET

watched from a distance
Illusion of slow motion
I watch you disrobe
Haiku #65028, by Peeping Tom of Jerking off in haste and in your bushes
June 21, 2019 4:46 pm ET

Pies cooling on sill
Along comes a tired hobo
The filling is poop
Haiku #65027, by Shamegmah O'Toole of Peeking
June 21, 2019 4:43 pm ET

Face down in the trough
Perfecting his art each day
The cunnilinguist
Haiku #65026, by Within Earshot of Troughslurper
June 21, 2019 4:39 pm ET

Theresa May Leaves,
And Is Replaced By Boris.
The Pantomime Continues.
Haiku #65025, by I am sick of Brexit
June 21, 2019 3:49 pm ET

Beware of assholes
Who fuck up their teeth real bad
But blame the dentist
Haiku #65024, by A penis is not a toothbrush
June 21, 2019 1:29 pm ET

Gilligan s Island
Cream Pie Cooperative
Extra ginger please
Haiku #65023, by 3 hour tour of My pants
June 20, 2019 12:46 am ET