BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
22 Years
285 Days
and
65639 Haikus
later...
No handed push ups
Blown out tyre on the freeway
Hulk penis car jack
Haiku #64963, by Hulk penis car jack and kissing booth
June 8, 2019 2:30 am ET

Sleeping is better
With animal companions
And a heating pad
Haiku #64962, by No need for men!!
June 8, 2019 2:21 am ET

Sometimes I wonder
Why do some say "sleeping with"
When they mean "fucking"?
Haiku #64961, by The bitch locked me out
June 7, 2019 11:59 pm ET

Dinosaur dung pile
Purple hue looks familiar
Remember Barney?
Haiku #64960, by Anonymous Poet
June 7, 2019 10:09 pm ET

Long handled basket
Collecting dollars for God
Celestial Cheapskate
Haiku #64959, by Penny of Heaven
June 7, 2019 10:06 pm ET

Dearly beloved
Exchanging vows. Groom missing.
On floor blowing priest.
Haiku #64958, by Let us spray
June 7, 2019 10:05 pm ET

Low plebe atheist
full of superficial shit;
Go forth. Sin some more.
Haiku #64957, by Only God Can Take Out Your Garbage of Everyone Runs From You
June 7, 2019 7:53 pm ET

looks anesthetized
the general consensus
O, Poor limp penis!
Haiku #64956, by Giving Up
June 7, 2019 4:22 pm ET

Perhaps a cartwheel
The grassy meridian
Now a fish market
Haiku #64955, by Molly Malone of Summer Eve
June 7, 2019 4:17 pm ET

If I'd a pussy
I would always finger it
Even in my sleep
Haiku #64954, by I wish I were born a bitch
June 7, 2019 2:37 pm ET

Robot ejaculate
Part doubleyoudeeforty
Part rubber cement
Haiku #64953, by Space nut of The lab
June 7, 2019 11:10 am ET

West Point sex assaults
March onward Christian soldiers
Tax dollars at work
Haiku #64952, by Anonymous Poet
June 7, 2019 10:11 am ET

Religion is dumb
Made to controll idiots
And keep them stupid

It is all bullshit
So are the true believers
Simple dumb bunnies

Confused by the world
So they seek comforting lies.....
Dumber than dog shit
Haiku #64951, by Jesus is lard
June 7, 2019 9:57 am ET

Your old lady-san
Cooks your goose every morning
Pees in your coffee
Haiku #64950, by Me play joke of Coke machine
June 7, 2019 7:22 am ET

Chopsticks pork chopsticks
Chopsticks rice chopsticks broccoli
Chopsticks fried foreskin
Haiku #64949, by Eat it of Slop chewy
June 7, 2019 7:19 am ET

life long dream fulfilled
To pee inside a woman
It was a wet dream
Haiku #64948, by Limb Gee
June 7, 2019 3:36 am ET

Smoke signals at dawn
Sending special messages
"You are a faggot"
Haiku #64947, by Indian
June 7, 2019 3:22 am ET

B
Haiku #64946, by
June 7, 2019 3:20 am ET

M
Haiku #64945, by
June 7, 2019 3:19 am ET

U
Haiku #64944, by
June 7, 2019 3:19 am ET

D
Haiku #64943, by
June 7, 2019 3:19 am ET

S
Haiku #64942, by
June 7, 2019 3:19 am ET

I
Haiku #64941, by
June 7, 2019 3:19 am ET

U
Haiku #64940, by
June 7, 2019 3:18 am ET

O
Haiku #64939, by
June 7, 2019 3:18 am ET

Y
Haiku #64938, by
June 7, 2019 3:17 am ET

Talked to a phone ho
Threw away some more money
Then masturbated
Haiku #64937, by Just a slow Wednesday
June 7, 2019 2:10 am ET

Mcdonalds orgy
jesus came in my milkshake
god came on my fries
Haiku #64936, by Ba da ba ba ba I'm lovin' it
June 7, 2019 1:47 am ET

Once upon a time
Back when blow jobs were in style
Suck it yourself, bro
Haiku #64935, by Glad to hear it of Spoojmeister
June 7, 2019 1:22 am ET

Time to use mouthwash.
I mistook your mouth for butt.
There's your asshole. Proof!
Haiku #64934, by Sweet Lil Old Jesus Condemns Your Filthy Soul
June 7, 2019 12:01 am ET

La Luz Del Mundo
Christianity sucks ass
There's your proof. Asshole
Haiku #64933, by Jesus is lard
June 6, 2019 11:28 pm ET

My Haiku woman
she treats me right, cooks my rice
my Old Lady-san
Haiku #64932, by Vertical Smile of Horizontal Hopes
June 6, 2019 10:52 am ET

I want to thank you for taking time to answer my mouthwash survey. My teachers were most pleased.
Haiku #64931, by student
June 6, 2019 9:15 am ET

Demoncrat donkeys
Bray against President Trump.
YES! Re-election.
Haiku #64930, by Some of you are So Pathetic of You Do Not Deserve Everything You Do Not Get
June 5, 2019 9:15 pm ET

I may not be a smart man,
but I know what love is.
Haiku #64929, by Forrest of I love you, Jenny.
June 5, 2019 7:32 am ET

Donkeys in church
Can't help acting like asses
Now then, Let us bray
Haiku #64928, by jenny of 867-5309
June 5, 2019 1:15 am ET

Donkeys in church
Can
Haiku #64927, by Jenny of Ass
June 4, 2019 3:58 am ET

You said ERECTION
Just made you say ERECTION
BAH HA HA HA HA!
Haiku #64926, by Beau Nerd
June 4, 2019 3:54 am ET

Deadbeat? Ha I mean
Resurrection is some good
Father-Son bonding
Haiku #64925, by The Father is Spirit
June 3, 2019 10:22 pm ET

You will meet Jesus.
He won't care about ice cream.
He will be your Judge.
Haiku #64924, by Be Saved Before It's Too Late
June 3, 2019 8:54 pm ET

If I met Jesus
I'd buy him a big ice cream
An ice cream sundae
Haiku #64923, by His Father probably never did of Deadbeat Cheapskate
June 3, 2019 2:57 pm ET


Just in time for church
Jerk off in baptismal font
Cross off TO DO LIST
Haiku #64922, by Busy Day Guy
June 2, 2019 9:08 pm ET

It is still Sunday;
a good day to worship God.
(while Darth beats his meat)
Haiku #64921, by Holiness Proclaimed of 8 Days a Week
June 2, 2019 4:41 pm ET

Sunday for Jesus
All other days for Satan
That's how y'all roll
Haiku #64920, by Jesus is lard
June 2, 2019 11:14 am ET

Today is Sunday.
A good day to worship God.
(while Darth plays with shit)
Haiku #64919, by Holiness Exalted of Sinners Condemned
June 2, 2019 8:56 am ET

I soak my penis
In a combination of
Three fine mouthwashes
Haiku #64918, by Rural Guido of No toucha da mushrooms
May 31, 2019 6:00 pm ET

Hi.

I have a very short questionnaire I'd like to present and thank you in advance for answering.

Do you prefer Listerine, Scope, or Colgate mouthwash?

And what is your preferred flavor?

It's for a class project.

Thanks again.
Haiku #64917, by student
May 31, 2019 4:41 pm ET

I just called MULE RID
Whoever answered the phone
Brayed loud in my ear
Haiku #64916, by I give up
May 31, 2019 3:49 am ET

All this camel dung
Coming up between my toes
These sandals are shot
Haiku #64915, by O. Asis of Somewhere
May 31, 2019 3:44 am ET

When you make a list
It helps you get organized
Things to do: Get Laid
Haiku #64914, by Can't read the list of Wet smudge
May 31, 2019 3:38 am ET