Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 136 Days and 76969 Haiku later...

S
Haiku # 64942, June 7, 2019 3:19 am ET
by
I
Haiku # 64941, June 7, 2019 3:19 am ET
by
U
Haiku # 64940, June 7, 2019 3:18 am ET
by
O
Haiku # 64939, June 7, 2019 3:18 am ET
by
Y
Haiku # 64938, June 7, 2019 3:17 am ET
by
Talked to a phone ho
Threw away some more money
Then masturbated
Haiku # 64937, June 7, 2019 2:10 am ET
by Just a slow Wednesday
Mcdonalds orgy
jesus came in my milkshake
god came on my fries
Haiku # 64936, June 7, 2019 1:47 am ET
by Ba da ba ba ba I'm lovin' it
Once upon a time
Back when blow jobs were in style
Suck it yourself, bro
Haiku # 64935, June 7, 2019 1:22 am ET
by Glad to hear it of Spoojmeister
Time to use mouthwash.
I mistook your mouth for butt.
There's your asshole. Proof!
Haiku # 64934, June 7, 2019 12:01 am ET
by Sweet Lil Old Jesus Condemns Your Filthy Soul
La Luz Del Mundo
Christianity sucks ass
There's your proof. Asshole
Haiku # 64933, June 6, 2019 11:28 pm ET
by Jesus is lard
My Haiku woman
she treats me right, cooks my rice
my Old Lady-san
Haiku # 64932, June 6, 2019 10:52 am ET
by Vertical Smile of Horizontal Hopes
I want to thank you for taking time to answer my mouthwash survey. My teachers were most pleased.
Haiku # 64931, June 6, 2019 9:15 am ET
by student
Demoncrat donkeys
Bray against President Trump.
YES! Re-election.
Haiku # 64930, June 5, 2019 9:15 pm ET
by Some of you are So Pathetic of You Do Not Deserve Everything You Do Not Get
I may not be a smart man,
but I know what love is.
Haiku # 64929, June 5, 2019 7:32 am ET
by Forrest of I love you, Jenny.
Donkeys in church
Can't help acting like asses
Now then, Let us bray
Haiku # 64928, June 5, 2019 1:15 am ET
by jenny of 867-5309
Donkeys in church
Can
Haiku # 64927, June 4, 2019 3:58 am ET
by Jenny of Ass
You said ERECTION
Just made you say ERECTION
BAH HA HA HA HA!
Haiku # 64926, June 4, 2019 3:54 am ET
by Beau Nerd
Deadbeat? Ha I mean
Resurrection is some good
Father-Son bonding
Haiku # 64925, June 3, 2019 10:22 pm ET
by The Father is Spirit
You will meet Jesus.
He won't care about ice cream.
He will be your Judge.
Haiku # 64924, June 3, 2019 8:54 pm ET
by Be Saved Before It's Too Late
If I met Jesus
I'd buy him a big ice cream
An ice cream sundae
Haiku # 64923, June 3, 2019 2:57 pm ET
by His Father probably never did of Deadbeat Cheapskate

Just in time for church
Jerk off in baptismal font
Cross off TO DO LIST
Haiku # 64922, June 2, 2019 9:08 pm ET
by Busy Day Guy
It is still Sunday;
a good day to worship God.
(while Darth beats his meat)
Haiku # 64921, June 2, 2019 4:41 pm ET
by Holiness Proclaimed of 8 Days a Week
Sunday for Jesus
All other days for Satan
That's how y'all roll
Haiku # 64920, June 2, 2019 11:14 am ET
by Jesus is lard
Today is Sunday.
A good day to worship God.
(while Darth plays with shit)
Haiku # 64919, June 2, 2019 8:56 am ET
by Holiness Exalted of Sinners Condemned
I soak my penis
In a combination of
Three fine mouthwashes
Haiku # 64918, May 31, 2019 6:00 pm ET
by Rural Guido of No toucha da mushrooms
Hi.

I have a very short questionnaire I'd like to present and thank you in advance for answering.

Do you prefer Listerine, Scope, or Colgate mouthwash?

And what is your preferred flavor?

It's for a class project.

Thanks again.
Haiku # 64917, May 31, 2019 4:41 pm ET
by student
I just called MULE RID
Whoever answered the phone
Brayed loud in my ear
Haiku # 64916, May 31, 2019 3:49 am ET
by I give up
All this camel dung
Coming up between my toes
These sandals are shot
Haiku # 64915, May 31, 2019 3:44 am ET
by O. Asis of Somewhere
When you make a list
It helps you get organized
Things to do: Get Laid
Haiku # 64914, May 31, 2019 3:38 am ET
by Can't read the list of Wet smudge
Fucked by a donkey?
Got an ass stuck in your ass?
Call Burro-Be-Gone!
Haiku # 64913, May 31, 2019 3:34 am ET
by 1-800-MULE-RID
Lawn mowing contest
Who will have the shortest grass?
Be the biggest ass?
Haiku # 64912, May 30, 2019 10:51 pm ET
by Get a goat
Phoney hoes fake foreheads noses n blood of sacrificial fetus for life of luxury just for him to go get a new bitch preggo
Haiku # 64911, May 30, 2019 9:16 pm ET
by Your Cunt was Outdone of Lizard face Herp Son
Nippress and Ash, long at Last
StarWars themed
Wedding Rings
w00t! w00t!
Haiku # 64910, May 30, 2019 6:35 pm ET
by iamback
Poke your head out now
You zit faced motherfucker
Conjoined headless twin
Haiku # 64909, May 30, 2019 4:35 pm ET
by longstanding of Erection
Santa Claus penis
Long hard and so minty fresh
Cum to the North Pole
Haiku # 64908, May 30, 2019 4:31 pm ET
by Lump of Coal
You should be happy 7 finally got what u wanted. Him away from me. Stolen true Judah u crusty bitch gave it all for trade. And turned them into slaves. Only to sell them their true creativity and art back while u slaughter them. You in your filth. Be glad now u have it...
Haiku # 64907, May 30, 2019 9:43 am ET
by Trash bitch of He will die again by your hand
Bitch stfu for a change
Haiku # 64906, May 30, 2019 9:28 am ET
by Snails melt of In their salt
The ones who escaped
Will serve as "chocolate jimmies"
On my ice cream cone
Haiku # 64905, May 29, 2019 3:58 pm ET
by Xterminator of Anthill
Abducted and killed
Bludgeoned dead and set on fire
Extreme meat beating
Haiku # 64904, May 29, 2019 3:56 pm ET
by Don't try this at home of Anthill
Relentless pursuit
A place to store my boogers
The bedpost is full
Haiku # 64903, May 29, 2019 3:52 pm ET
by Ideas on this ?
Is God the Devil?
Does the Devil have red horns?
Does God wear a robe?
Haiku # 64902, May 29, 2019 9:45 am ET
by Religion confuses me
Solo maypole dance
Just me thumping on the walls
By the way, I'm nude
Haiku # 64901, May 29, 2019 9:41 am ET
by How do?
Even the demons
Believe that there is one God
to cast them in Hell.
Haiku # 64900, May 29, 2019 8:26 am ET
by Fluffy Lamb of Christophobia
When the honking starts,
some of the honklers get honked.
It's Honkl-O-Rama!
Haiku # 64899, May 29, 2019 8:13 am ET
by Clowning in The Tragedy of Facepaint
Hey Mouthful: listen.
You need to say it Haiku
that's five-Seven-five
Haiku # 64898, May 29, 2019 8:07 am ET
by Or Else Shut Yer Yap
be afraid of losing my voice and the rest of the day before I get a follow back on my way home from work to be the first half of the day before I get a follow back on my way home from work to be the first half of the year and I don't think that I can get it right away with the new version is better to be the best of the year and I don't know how much you love it and it was the best of the year of high quality of life and the first half of the day I don't think that I have a great way of the year of high quality of life and the first half of the year and a lot more fun and addicting and I don't know how much you love it and it is not the same thing to say I don't think that the first half of the day I don't think I have to go back and I don't think I can see it as an excuse for the next few weeks of school tomorrow and I'm still not sure what I was a great way of the day before the end of the year of high quality and the other hand is the only thing that would make it a lot of the day before I go back and I don't think that the first half of the year of high quality and the other hand is the only thing that would make it a lot of the day before the end of the year and a lot more fun and I have a good time with the new version is the only one that is a good time with the same thing to say
Haiku # 64897, May 29, 2019 7:54 am ET
by Mouthful
In his last dream seems
Was a sheep man- Colt .45
Winchester rifle

Protecting the sheep
That what he was- a true fact
In the D.O.D.

Thirty some long years
A sheepman protecting sheep
Adios Old Pard- thanks..
Haiku # 64896, May 29, 2019 4:50 am ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
The ET lizards
Came for old pard Joe-the man
lived by his own rules

"This is not good"-said
The Lizards from the black void
"Brother Joe times up"

Said the GD Zards-
Brother Joe knew- no chance
Go with them he must.

A GD good man
Roamed the world his whole long life.
And went out punching hard
Haiku # 64895, May 29, 2019 4:41 am ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
I knocked up jesus
Who then gave birth to Satan
Who has daddy's eyes
Haiku # 64894, May 29, 2019 4:36 am ET
by Born bad and getting worse
Sort of off topic
Overdue library books
Please return them now
Haiku # 64893, May 29, 2019 1:23 am ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
< 50 Less Recent Haiku 50 More Recent Haiku >