Don''t you see my friend?
This is the Bad Haiku site
Not the Lovely one.

too many haikus
two per week should be limit
to stop flow of shit

People better learn
How to write fucking haikus
Or don''t submit stuff

Him: "I don`t get your
Emotional heiroglyphs."
Heiroglyphs??? Twat!

Robert DeNiro
Wasn`t in `The Deerstalker`.
Bloody film students.

Twenty weeks in Greece?
Why''s he so pale? I`ll tell you:
Archeology.

Punks Gettin Froggy
I regale them with ardor
Drink up their forties

Orthodox haiku
Will never accommodate
Antidisestab-

In an ideal world
I would slump around all day
Wrapped in a duvet

tropical storm front
impressive special effects
ozone in the nostrils

Meaningful haiku
Tends to be greatly improved
By the word `minge`.

People left behind
Are more fondly remembered
When kept in the past.

The skyline I see
Has it''s moments with the sun
It''s way too nice here

She shouted at me,
and warned me that I should pray.
Her face spoke the truth.

Did you ever think
that you would grow up and see
things in this way

Again, I said, "you don''t take me seriously.
You said, "you''re kidding."

I said, "you don''t understand me."
You said, "You''re kidding!"

First goose
Last fly
Autumn

Long-haired dude from France
You stole my lovely girlfriend
I kill your poodle

Squick, squick, squick, squick, squick
Trephination really rules
Now I make haiku.

in the sand my ilk
My gall upone the shoreline
warming to a boil

gummy slumtrop gil
flie flimtrop thilth ghuyilthsom
like the pounding surf

That means I''m back, Folks!
I would like to live with you
If it comes to that!

CAAAAAAN YOUUU HAAANDLE IT!!!
Coming straight right at your ass
My giant psyche?

Stomach turns and churns
Feeling the force of dinner
I have to poop bad

A caf

Wild thoughts are rattling
Like a pea in a tin cup
I just don''t get chicks

Precipitation.
Great fat globules of the stuff
trickling down my back.

to quote frank zappa :
"the crux of the matter is.....
the apostrophe"

careful with that axe
i heard the bonfire whisper
so wot''s uh, the deal

Sometimes I just spin
Like a crazy spinning top
Other times, I don''t

Syd....is it you there
on the other side of this?
Shine on...crazy one.

Oh....Whoa Black Betty!
Bam-A-Lamm....Yeah....Bam-A-Lamm!
Say, Whoa Black Betty!

fear can give us hope

hope is blind optimism

fear of hope is blind

bad haiku is weird
i may not visit again
until then, good bye

my cube is haunted
nerd ghosts materialize
searching for sliderules

pinned by a small girl
I embarassed my father
"Daddy, please!" I yelled

I started Pink Floyd
all that shit was my idea
I really rocked then

reach deep in myself
produce one gory organ
to skid in the pan

Driving on backroads
With the sun setting brightly
I jam to LED ZEPP

Is that liquid egg
The by-product of chickens
With diarrhoea?

All I do is wait
It wouldn''t be so bad if
There was a hammock

''Cocksucker'', you say.
D`you kiss your mum with that tongue?
Huh, motherfucker?

giles de la tourette
cocksucking motherfucker
swears by bad haiku

cumulonimbus
rolling thunder to the north
fat patters of rain

These stupid buttons
Are driving me doolally
The Internet sucks

Each month''s last Friday
Results in a tiny cheque
We call it "payday"

Each month''s last Friday

It''s such a cruel sport,
but you just gotta laugh at
that dwarf tossing game.