Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 355 Days and 77338 Haiku later...

Did you ever think
that you would grow up and see
things in this way
Haiku # 2175, September 30, 1999 5:25 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Again, I said, "you don''t take me seriously.
You said, "you''re kidding."
Haiku # 2174, September 30, 1999 4:50 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I said, "you don''t understand me."
You said, "You''re kidding!"
Haiku # 2173, September 30, 1999 4:48 pm ET
by John
First goose
Last fly
Autumn
Haiku # 2172, September 30, 1999 4:46 pm ET
by Roland of Baltimore, USA
Long-haired dude from France
You stole my lovely girlfriend
I kill your poodle
Haiku # 2171, September 30, 1999 12:57 pm ET
by Xavier of Chapel Hill, USA
Squick, squick, squick, squick, squick
Trephination really rules
Now I make haiku.
Haiku # 2170, September 30, 1999 9:25 am ET
by Squick
in the sand my ilk
My gall upone the shoreline
warming to a boil
Haiku # 2169, September 29, 1999 8:24 pm ET
by Ernest Unity of !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
gummy slumtrop gil
flie flimtrop thilth ghuyilthsom
like the pounding surf
Haiku # 2168, September 29, 1999 8:22 pm ET
by Ernest Unity of !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
That means I''m back, Folks!
I would like to live with you
If it comes to that!
Haiku # 2167, September 29, 1999 8:09 pm ET
by Ernest Unity of !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CAAAAAAN YOUUU HAAANDLE IT!!!
Coming straight right at your ass
My giant psyche?
Haiku # 2166, September 29, 1999 8:06 pm ET
by Ernest Unity of !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Haiku # 2165, September 29, 1999 7:53 pm ET
by Ernest Unity
Stomach turns and churns
Feeling the force of dinner
I have to poop bad
Haiku # 2164, September 29, 1999 2:20 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of Syracuse, USA
A caf
Haiku # 2163, September 29, 1999 6:19 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Wild thoughts are rattling
Like a pea in a tin cup
I just don''t get chicks
Haiku # 2162, September 29, 1999 6:15 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Precipitation.
Great fat globules of the stuff
trickling down my back.
Haiku # 2161, September 29, 1999 4:07 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
to quote frank zappa :
"the crux of the matter is.....
the apostrophe"
Haiku # 2160, September 28, 1999 5:44 am ET
by ash
careful with that axe
i heard the bonfire whisper
so wot''s uh, the deal
Haiku # 2159, September 28, 1999 5:41 am ET
by ash
Sometimes I just spin
Like a crazy spinning top
Other times, I don''t
Haiku # 2158, September 28, 1999 5:06 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Syd....is it you there
on the other side of this?
Shine on...crazy one.
Haiku # 2157, September 26, 1999 5:59 am ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Oh....Whoa Black Betty!
Bam-A-Lamm....Yeah....Bam-A-Lamm!
Say, Whoa Black Betty!
Haiku # 2156, September 26, 1999 5:57 am ET
by Tony's Grandpa
fear can give us hope

hope is blind optimism

fear of hope is blind
Haiku # 2155, September 25, 1999 4:20 pm ET
by betty of birmingham, usa
bad haiku is weird
i may not visit again
until then, good bye
Haiku # 2154, September 25, 1999 12:07 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
my cube is haunted
nerd ghosts materialize
searching for sliderules
Haiku # 2153, September 25, 1999 5:36 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
pinned by a small girl
I embarassed my father
"Daddy, please!" I yelled
Haiku # 2152, September 25, 1999 5:32 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
I started Pink Floyd
all that shit was my idea
I really rocked then
Haiku # 2151, September 25, 1999 5:30 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
reach deep in myself
produce one gory organ
to skid in the pan
Haiku # 2150, September 25, 1999 5:28 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
Driving on backroads
With the sun setting brightly
I jam to LED ZEPP
Haiku # 2149, September 24, 1999 4:43 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Is that liquid egg
The by-product of chickens
With diarrhoea?
Haiku # 2148, September 24, 1999 8:39 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
All I do is wait
It wouldn''t be so bad if
There was a hammock
Haiku # 2147, September 24, 1999 8:37 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
''Cocksucker'', you say.
D`you kiss your mum with that tongue?
Huh, motherfucker?
Haiku # 2146, September 24, 1999 7:11 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
giles de la tourette
cocksucking motherfucker
swears by bad haiku
Haiku # 2145, September 24, 1999 6:18 am ET
by ash
cumulonimbus
rolling thunder to the north
fat patters of rain
Haiku # 2144, September 24, 1999 6:02 am ET
by ash
These stupid buttons
Are driving me doolally
The Internet sucks
Haiku # 2143, September 24, 1999 3:14 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Each month''s last Friday
Results in a tiny cheque
We call it "payday"
Haiku # 2142, September 24, 1999 3:13 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Each month''s last Friday
Haiku # 2141, September 24, 1999 3:13 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
It''s such a cruel sport,
but you just gotta laugh at
that dwarf tossing game.
Haiku # 2140, September 23, 1999 4:25 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Visualize this......

Dwarf tossing at night with a

Scrunty Hardbody.
Haiku # 2139, September 23, 1999 4:17 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Tell me a story.
Double-space it, make it good.
Sign it with my name..
Haiku # 2138, September 23, 1999 9:39 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
la la, the song goes.
La la la la la la la...
Oh, you know the one..
Haiku # 2137, September 23, 1999 9:27 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
It''s motivation
That''s lacking in this damn place
That, or topless girls
Haiku # 2136, September 23, 1999 8:46 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Like Charlton Heston
I wage war on night creatures
Man, I hate badgers
Haiku # 2135, September 23, 1999 8:44 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Red buses are crap
You wait ages for just one
Then three come at once
Haiku # 2134, September 23, 1999 8:19 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Red buses are crap
Haiku # 2133, September 23, 1999 8:18 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I miss red buses.
The ones here are bright yellow;
full of schoolchildren.
Haiku # 2132, September 23, 1999 7:45 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
His name was Nigel.
What`s more, it quite suited him.
Which is a pity.
Haiku # 2131, September 23, 1999 7:41 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
If it don''t have milk
Then it isn''t a milk shake
Why can''t you see that?
Haiku # 2130, September 23, 1999 5:38 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
The Millennium
Draws closer, like a workman
With a claw hammer
Haiku # 2129, September 23, 1999 5:20 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Body parts as clothes
Are somewhat reminiscent
Of that Ed fellow
Haiku # 2128, September 23, 1999 5:19 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Jan Brady is Sweet.
I want to have her and wear
her ass as a hat.
Haiku # 2127, September 23, 1999 3:30 am ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Front Row Joe You Dog
John was waving black and white
Checkered victory
Haiku # 2126, September 22, 1999 8:52 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
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