Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 355 Days and 77338 Haiku later...

Robert DeNiro
Wasn`t in `The Deerstalker`.
Bloody film students.
Haiku # 2185, October 1, 1999 8:21 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Twenty weeks in Greece?
Why''s he so pale? I`ll tell you:
Archeology.
Haiku # 2184, October 1, 1999 8:18 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Punks Gettin Froggy
I regale them with ardor
Drink up their forties
Haiku # 2183, October 1, 1999 8:14 am ET
by Fruity of Oakland,
Orthodox haiku
Will never accommodate
Antidisestab-
Haiku # 2182, October 1, 1999 8:09 am ET
by Scrunty Harbdody
In an ideal world
I would slump around all day
Wrapped in a duvet
Haiku # 2181, October 1, 1999 8:06 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
tropical storm front
impressive special effects
ozone in the nostrils
Haiku # 2180, October 1, 1999 5:39 am ET
by ash
Meaningful haiku
Tends to be greatly improved
By the word `minge`.
Haiku # 2179, October 1, 1999 4:00 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
People left behind
Are more fondly remembered
When kept in the past.
Haiku # 2178, October 1, 1999 3:54 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
The skyline I see
Has it''s moments with the sun
It''s way too nice here
Haiku # 2177, September 30, 1999 5:34 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
She shouted at me,
and warned me that I should pray.
Her face spoke the truth.
Haiku # 2176, September 30, 1999 5:31 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Did you ever think
that you would grow up and see
things in this way
Haiku # 2175, September 30, 1999 5:25 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Again, I said, "you don''t take me seriously.
You said, "you''re kidding."
Haiku # 2174, September 30, 1999 4:50 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I said, "you don''t understand me."
You said, "You''re kidding!"
Haiku # 2173, September 30, 1999 4:48 pm ET
by John
First goose
Last fly
Autumn
Haiku # 2172, September 30, 1999 4:46 pm ET
by Roland of Baltimore, USA
Long-haired dude from France
You stole my lovely girlfriend
I kill your poodle
Haiku # 2171, September 30, 1999 12:57 pm ET
by Xavier of Chapel Hill, USA
Squick, squick, squick, squick, squick
Trephination really rules
Now I make haiku.
Haiku # 2170, September 30, 1999 9:25 am ET
by Squick
in the sand my ilk
My gall upone the shoreline
warming to a boil
Haiku # 2169, September 29, 1999 8:24 pm ET
by Ernest Unity of !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
gummy slumtrop gil
flie flimtrop thilth ghuyilthsom
like the pounding surf
Haiku # 2168, September 29, 1999 8:22 pm ET
by Ernest Unity of !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
That means I''m back, Folks!
I would like to live with you
If it comes to that!
Haiku # 2167, September 29, 1999 8:09 pm ET
by Ernest Unity of !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CAAAAAAN YOUUU HAAANDLE IT!!!
Coming straight right at your ass
My giant psyche?
Haiku # 2166, September 29, 1999 8:06 pm ET
by Ernest Unity of !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Haiku # 2165, September 29, 1999 7:53 pm ET
by Ernest Unity
Stomach turns and churns
Feeling the force of dinner
I have to poop bad
Haiku # 2164, September 29, 1999 2:20 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of Syracuse, USA
A caf
Haiku # 2163, September 29, 1999 6:19 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Wild thoughts are rattling
Like a pea in a tin cup
I just don''t get chicks
Haiku # 2162, September 29, 1999 6:15 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Precipitation.
Great fat globules of the stuff
trickling down my back.
Haiku # 2161, September 29, 1999 4:07 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
to quote frank zappa :
"the crux of the matter is.....
the apostrophe"
Haiku # 2160, September 28, 1999 5:44 am ET
by ash
careful with that axe
i heard the bonfire whisper
so wot''s uh, the deal
Haiku # 2159, September 28, 1999 5:41 am ET
by ash
Sometimes I just spin
Like a crazy spinning top
Other times, I don''t
Haiku # 2158, September 28, 1999 5:06 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Syd....is it you there
on the other side of this?
Shine on...crazy one.
Haiku # 2157, September 26, 1999 5:59 am ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Oh....Whoa Black Betty!
Bam-A-Lamm....Yeah....Bam-A-Lamm!
Say, Whoa Black Betty!
Haiku # 2156, September 26, 1999 5:57 am ET
by Tony's Grandpa
fear can give us hope

hope is blind optimism

fear of hope is blind
Haiku # 2155, September 25, 1999 4:20 pm ET
by betty of birmingham, usa
bad haiku is weird
i may not visit again
until then, good bye
Haiku # 2154, September 25, 1999 12:07 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
my cube is haunted
nerd ghosts materialize
searching for sliderules
Haiku # 2153, September 25, 1999 5:36 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
pinned by a small girl
I embarassed my father
"Daddy, please!" I yelled
Haiku # 2152, September 25, 1999 5:32 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
I started Pink Floyd
all that shit was my idea
I really rocked then
Haiku # 2151, September 25, 1999 5:30 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
reach deep in myself
produce one gory organ
to skid in the pan
Haiku # 2150, September 25, 1999 5:28 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
Driving on backroads
With the sun setting brightly
I jam to LED ZEPP
Haiku # 2149, September 24, 1999 4:43 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Is that liquid egg
The by-product of chickens
With diarrhoea?
Haiku # 2148, September 24, 1999 8:39 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
All I do is wait
It wouldn''t be so bad if
There was a hammock
Haiku # 2147, September 24, 1999 8:37 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
''Cocksucker'', you say.
D`you kiss your mum with that tongue?
Huh, motherfucker?
Haiku # 2146, September 24, 1999 7:11 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
giles de la tourette
cocksucking motherfucker
swears by bad haiku
Haiku # 2145, September 24, 1999 6:18 am ET
by ash
cumulonimbus
rolling thunder to the north
fat patters of rain
Haiku # 2144, September 24, 1999 6:02 am ET
by ash
These stupid buttons
Are driving me doolally
The Internet sucks
Haiku # 2143, September 24, 1999 3:14 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Each month''s last Friday
Results in a tiny cheque
We call it "payday"
Haiku # 2142, September 24, 1999 3:13 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Each month''s last Friday
Haiku # 2141, September 24, 1999 3:13 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
It''s such a cruel sport,
but you just gotta laugh at
that dwarf tossing game.
Haiku # 2140, September 23, 1999 4:25 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Visualize this......

Dwarf tossing at night with a

Scrunty Hardbody.
Haiku # 2139, September 23, 1999 4:17 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Tell me a story.
Double-space it, make it good.
Sign it with my name..
Haiku # 2138, September 23, 1999 9:39 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
la la, the song goes.
La la la la la la la...
Oh, you know the one..
Haiku # 2137, September 23, 1999 9:27 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
It''s motivation
That''s lacking in this damn place
That, or topless girls
Haiku # 2136, September 23, 1999 8:46 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
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