Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 353 Days and 77338 Haiku later...

Hey....would you ever
lick Sally Struther''s stretch marks?
Well!? So then would you?
Haiku # 1489, June 28, 1999 6:50 pm ET
by Tony's Grandpa
If you lay naked
on a bed of fireants
I know I''d love you!
Haiku # 1488, June 28, 1999 6:35 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Saw the hand of God.
It tried to take me away.
I''m not ready yet!!!
Haiku # 1487, June 28, 1999 6:22 pm ET
by Tony's Grandpa
Eeeeew! Frozen lamas --
It get friggin'' cold at night
here in Dharmsala
Haiku # 1486, June 28, 1999 4:38 pm ET
by Fernando Lamas of Lhasa, Tibet
ah frozen llamas
the bane of my existence
I DESTROY THEM ALL!!!!!!
Haiku # 1485, June 28, 1999 12:03 pm ET
by Infinity of shithole, us of fucking a
nursing the rabbit
watching cartoons from the lounge
so pleased with yourself
Haiku # 1484, June 28, 1999 12:39 am ET
by ash
sometimes i just sit
wondering if i can fit
and then i submit
Haiku # 1483, June 25, 1999 3:45 am ET
by ash
Sitting on the porch
having my way with a beer
when a fart slipped out
Haiku # 1482, June 24, 1999 3:16 pm ET
by Tony's Grandpa
This is just to test
To see if the time stamp is
Working properly
Haiku # 1481, June 24, 1999 12:28 pm ET
by Janis of Los Angeles, USA
achoo! gesundheit
cover your mouth, idiot
don't want your disease
Haiku # 1480, June 24, 1999 8:45 am ET
by Emcee Escher
gurgling again
lactose intolerance sucks
coffee is safer
Haiku # 1479, June 24, 1999 5:50 am ET
by Emcee Escher
next cube's a lunger
so proud of his infection
atomised virus
Haiku # 1478, June 24, 1999 5:42 am ET
by Emcee Escher
The morning is best
although the evening is good
for seeing the stars
Haiku # 1477, June 24, 1999 3:50 am ET
by SHAGGYDOO
it goes round and round
and doesn''t stop there even
it does other stuff
Haiku # 1476, June 24, 1999 3:49 am ET
by ash
Looking for the words
to show my satisfaction
for the head you gave
Haiku # 1475, June 23, 1999 6:06 pm ET
by Tony's Grandpa
I realize that
Quotation marks are all fucked
This will be fixed soon
Haiku # 1474, June 23, 1999 11:58 am ET
by Janis of Los Angeles, USA
This is a neat trick --
I hang rednecks from my porch
The Klan don''t come here.
Haiku # 1473, June 23, 1999 2:40 am ET
by Bubba Jim Goldberg of Trailer Trash,
This is a neat trick --
I hang rednecks my porch
The Klan don''t come here.
Haiku # 1472, June 23, 1999 2:39 am ET
by Bubba Jim Goldberg of Trailer Trash ,
Riots in the streets--
Chaos & confusion reign--
Y2K? Haiku!
Haiku # 1471, June 23, 1999 2:31 am ET
by Nunya Bidness of Houston
Nooooo not the comma!
I meant the apostrophe!
I guess I AM stoned!
Haiku # 1470, June 22, 1999 7:58 pm ET
by Tony's Grandpa
Hey Janis check this.....
Your commas are quotations
When I type them in...
Haiku # 1469, June 22, 1999 7:55 pm ET
by Look up to ---> What the ?!!!
Fuckin'' ripoff scam
Try taking a cab downtown
See how they do YOU
Haiku # 1468, June 22, 1999 7:46 pm ET
by WHAT The HELL !?!!
Alaskan coastline
Birds, fish, life, all God''s wonder
Exxon is EVIL!!!
Haiku # 1467, June 22, 1999 7:39 pm ET
by HEY!! What the......?!
take me for granted
we haven''t made love in years
you make me feel old
Haiku # 1466, June 22, 1999 12:28 pm ET
by Sleepwalker
i went to kuwait
ate dishwater and curry
taste my vacation
Haiku # 1465, June 22, 1999 11:36 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Lighten up, Emcee
Where there''s a will, there''s a way
to make things cheery!
Haiku # 1464, June 22, 1999 10:42 am ET
by Tiffani
blind me, look at this

grey as a thunderhead

great... more depression
Haiku # 1463, June 22, 1999 10:23 am ET
by Emcee Escher
with regards to us
i sometimes understand u
somewhat more than me
Haiku # 1462, June 22, 1999 7:18 am ET
by ash
as with new seasons
the return of bad haiku
inspires poetry
Haiku # 1461, June 22, 1999 4:01 am ET
by ash
another damn day
a motherfucking big mess
unwoven toupee
Haiku # 1460, June 21, 1999 9:21 pm ET
by Infinity of BLAH
Congratulations
Janis, on your new site. It''s
a lovely upgrade.
Haiku # 1459, June 21, 1999 8:58 pm ET
by Adam
This is a haiku
test to see if the new site
is working. Is it?
Haiku # 1458, June 21, 1999 8:56 pm ET
by Adam
Why can''t we go home?
A fine question to be asked
By those with no clue
Haiku # 1457, June 21, 1999 8:55 pm ET
by Janis of LA, USA
O please silly link
Post my very bad haiku
Or die die die die
Haiku # 1456, June 21, 1999 8:46 pm ET
by Janis of Los Angeles, USA
bad01
bad02
bad03
Haiku # 1455, June 21, 1999 8:18 pm ET
by Janis of TOronto, CA
Dumb dog stop glaring,
that was a long time ago.
its back to dog food.
Haiku # 1454, June 21, 1999 8:11 pm ET
by Kevin Libin
This is a haiku
test to see if the new site
is working. Is it?
Haiku # 1453, June 21, 1999 8:11 pm ET
by Adam
Dear GreenPeace,please note
My Dick is named FLIPPER
He is my pet Dolphin
Haiku # 1452, April 7, 1999 12:26 pm ET
by johnny waddsea world, waddworld of sports
If It Smells Like Fish
Shes a Dish, if It Smells Like
Cologne, Leave Alone
Haiku # 1451, April 7, 1999 12:07 pm ET
by johnny waddfishballs, stinkpieinmyeye
So sick of tuna
No choice but peanut butter
How does dolphin taste?
Haiku # 1450, April 5, 1999 10:40 pm ET
by Carnivore of Nowhereland, burp
don't ever forget
the screaming of the dolphins
dying in the nets
Haiku # 1449, April 5, 1999 9:28 pm ET
by Travis Nathaniel Travis of manchester, you know the big 1
missiles launched at night
stumbling NATO officers
pizza is ready
Haiku # 1448, April 5, 1999 8:42 pm ET
by Brian of New York, us
Uncle Wiggley
Was a goddamn phoney, Mac!
My cat's name is Bob
Haiku # 1447, April 5, 1999 8:19 pm ET
by Jack O'Lantern of Paris, U$@
kosovo problems ?
some things never seem to change
final solution ?
Haiku # 1446, April 5, 1999 8:10 pm ET
by ash
Slid on Bunny Poop
Fell down Stairs, CRASh thru window
DAMN EASTER BUNNY!!
Haiku # 1445, April 5, 1999 2:10 pm ET
by johnny waddwaddedelphia, waddatonia
good bye lady friend
no more cranial mismatch
just me and Hoover
Haiku # 1444, April 4, 1999 3:50 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
Crisp grease strip, sizzle!
Crunchy pork, i love you
full flavor:drip fat bliss
Haiku # 1443, April 4, 1999 2:47 pm ET
by dodo of kansas city, usa
Crisp grease strip, sizzle!
Crunchy pork, i love you
flavor:drip fat bliss
Haiku # 1442, April 4, 1999 2:46 pm ET
by dodo of kansas city, usa
dog eating cat shit,
breath like scatophile, now I
give him tube of crest
Haiku # 1441, April 3, 1999 11:21 pm ET
by Marian of kansas city, usa
coffee burns my tongue
like hot molten mocha love
i can't give head now
Haiku # 1440, April 2, 1999 4:47 pm ET
by Marian of kansas city, usa
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