Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 40 Days and 77432 Haiku later...

YOU THINK YOUR LIFE SUCKS?
WELL IT DOES, SO YOU ARE RIGHT
WHEW! SUCKS TO BE YOU!
Haiku # 762, November 20, 1998 12:13 am ET
by MICHELLE of PITTSBURGH, USA
I DO SO HATE MEN
MAYBE I SHOULD CONSIDER
FINDING A GIRLFRIEND
Haiku # 761, November 20, 1998 12:09 am ET
by MICHELLE of PITTSBURGH, USA
Hey pretty birdie
Perched high upon the treetop
Please don't poop on me
Haiku # 760, November 20, 1998 12:06 am ET
by Anna
counting syllables
i had a slight problem there
so sue me okay
Haiku # 759, November 19, 1998 7:35 pm ET
by a fan
hollywood bonfire
i enjoy your haiku, but
you are one sick puppy
Haiku # 758, November 19, 1998 7:26 pm ET
by a fan
hollywood bonfire
i enjoy your haiku, but
you are one sick puppy
Haiku # 757, November 19, 1998 7:26 pm ET
by a fan
Squirrels eating nuts
If they only knew the truth
They're all gonna die
Haiku # 756, November 19, 1998 7:13 pm ET
by I.McSuccor of Sarasota, USA
Flying bananas
Have stained the walls around me
Stale, mushy debris
Haiku # 755, November 19, 1998 7:00 pm ET
by Anna
I wrote a rock song
called 'let's tit fuck the fat guy'
I should tone it down
Haiku # 754, November 19, 1998 4:31 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
Some people think that
I am living in the sun
But it is cold here
Haiku # 753, November 19, 1998 2:43 pm ET
by Y10K of Toronto, Canada
Hot origami
Spewing from the Canon's mouth
Aieee!!! Paper jam!
Haiku # 752, November 19, 1998 12:51 pm ET
by Fingers McPhee of London, UK
Cow Revolution!
We will be discarded on
History
Haiku # 751, November 19, 1998 12:49 pm ET
by Fingers McPhee of London, UK
If Fate was a cop
I'd shoot him with his gun, and
play with his siren.
Haiku # 750, November 19, 1998 12:23 pm ET
by Walter Hale
cops make me nervous
in my trunk I still have those
two rotting pandas
Haiku # 749, November 19, 1998 11:25 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
If not for the wife
I'd start me a smack habit
Thanks a lot, you bitch
Haiku # 748, November 19, 1998 10:41 am ET
by Intern
If you have taste buds
You may be up Jacob's Creek
Without a paddle.
Haiku # 747, November 19, 1998 10:16 am ET
by Fingers McPhee of London, UK
*sip* *gag* *choke* Chateau
Cookaburra has hints of
Cat's piss and napalm.



Haiku # 746, November 19, 1998 10:15 am ET
by Fingers McPhee of London, UK
Don't be shy, mate. Jump
Hard on them. They say it's a
Good Athlete's Foot cure.
Haiku # 745, November 19, 1998 10:14 am ET
by Fingers McPhee of London, UK
Don't be shy, mate. Jump
Hard on them. They say it's a
Good Athlete's Foot cure.
Haiku # 744, November 19, 1998 10:13 am ET
by Fingers McPhee of London, UK
Australian wine!
This is what it would taste like
If grapes could wee.
Haiku # 743, November 19, 1998 10:12 am ET
by Fingers McPhee of London, UK
Oh Mr Ed, quit
Hassling me. Or it's the glue
Factory for you.
Haiku # 742, November 19, 1998 10:10 am ET
by Wilbur's Revenge of London, UK
oh souterini
5 then 7 syllables
then 5 again please
Haiku # 741, November 19, 1998 7:28 am ET
by one guess of sydney, Oz
and renovating
why is it that much slower
than interstellar travel
Haiku # 740, November 19, 1998 7:19 am ET
by ashley of Sydney, Oz
Turning 40
Face cracks
summer, winter
hair gone down sink
Haiku # 739, November 19, 1998 12:24 am ET
by Slinky Remover of Sydney, Australia
Moving, drifting cloud
Smells of bad eggs, with onions
Did somebody fart?
Haiku # 738, November 18, 1998 7:50 pm ET
by Ben Haas of Marietta, USA
holy shit I'm small
experiment gone awry
jump from key to key
.
Haiku # 737, November 18, 1998 3:24 pm ET
by .
old recurring dream:
Fonz says 'sit on it' to me
first punch breaks his nose
Haiku # 736, November 18, 1998 11:36 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
sure I'm a doctor
now let's just take a look here
what the hell is that?
Haiku # 735, November 18, 1998 11:16 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
some son of a bitch
kicked my grandma in the balls
and stole all her pills
Haiku # 734, November 18, 1998 10:40 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
Silly person
Trying to write good haiku not bad
Go eat a poop
Haiku # 733, November 17, 1998 11:24 pm ET
by Marco Esquandolas of RI,
It is the weak who
Do not have the guts to say
What they really think
Haiku # 732, November 17, 1998 8:00 pm ET
by overit
Why the Haiku's lack
of onomatopoeia?
Buzz! Click! Burp! Chirp! Poot!
Haiku # 731, November 17, 1998 7:18 pm ET
by Reg Reid of Palestine, US
Haiku # 730, November 17, 1998 7:15 pm ET
by Reg Reid of Palestine,
Leaves fall pattering
The forests brown red and gold
Autumn in the wind
Haiku # 729, November 17, 1998 4:34 pm ET
by Pete of Houston, USA
Unprepossessing
Showers are overrated
Revel in the stink
Haiku # 728, November 17, 1998 4:12 pm ET
by Intern
The Man pissed me off
anger's tasty medicine
I fist-fuck his face
Haiku # 727, November 17, 1998 3:48 pm ET
by
I get all dyslexic
when it comes to choosing words
With Haiku in mind
Haiku # 726, November 17, 1998 3:30 pm ET
by P.Keller of Phoenix, USA
auf boarisch hoasst des
imma no gstanzl macha
mia macha des aa

(that
Haiku # 725, November 17, 1998 12:43 pm ET
by bounty of munich, germany
some folks call it strange
when a man like me tries to
piss in his own mouth
Haiku # 724, November 17, 1998 10:39 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
pick which co-worker
is most likely to come in
and shoot everyone
Haiku # 723, November 17, 1998 10:18 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
i hate the toothache
but surely not as much as
i hate the dentist
Haiku # 722, November 17, 1998 5:39 am ET
by ashley of sydney, nsw
uninspiring
silly, stupid and mindless
bad haiku is great
Haiku # 721, November 17, 1998 12:26 am ET
by noone
princess dianna
please don't bring that up again
bulimic royal
Haiku # 720, November 16, 1998 7:33 pm ET
by ashley of sydney, australia
Delfines nadan
y todos van por el mar
as
Haiku # 719, November 16, 1998 5:55 pm ET
by Fernando Santiago of Bayam
Good night's sleep, OK?
Don't talk or turn on the light
Computer's asleep.
Haiku # 718, November 16, 1998 5:24 pm ET
by P.Keller of Phoenix, usa
hard night's whiskey binge
wake with a taste in my mouth
the devil's anus!
Haiku # 717, November 16, 1998 5:05 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
Is it just me, or
are pigs that sell ham products
very disturbing?
Haiku # 716, November 16, 1998 4:26 pm ET
by Trevor
Little bastard dog
Chewing on himself all day
Lucky bastard dog
Haiku # 715, November 16, 1998 4:18 pm ET
by Trevor
submissions working!
exciting, must up my pace
three thousand a day
Haiku # 714, November 16, 1998 3:19 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
Haiku is very nice
but let's stop this nonsense now
and get on living.
Haiku # 713, November 16, 1998 10:18 am ET
by Fernando Santiago of Bayam