Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 41 Days and 77432 Haiku later...

I can't count -- big shit
Five, seven, five syllables?
Hey, it's bad haiku.
Haiku # 812, November 26, 1998 6:26 pm ET
by Nunya BidnessOn the Bayou,
A helium-filled
Hindenburg: "Oh the human-
Hey! I'm Mickey Mouse!"
Haiku # 811, November 26, 1998 6:56 am ET
by Reverend Jim of London, UK
A dingo ate my
Baby!
Sparklingly novel As excuses go.
Haiku # 810, November 26, 1998 6:20 am ET
by Reverend Jim of London, UK
Sometimes I wonder
Where did we go, what went wrong?
I guess it's over.
Haiku # 809, November 26, 1998 6:10 am ET
by Anna
Tortured girl is she
Searching for answers not found
Why not look within?
Haiku # 808, November 26, 1998 6:04 am ET
by ylilregithh
God I love the beats
God I love San Francisco
Vesuvio Bar!!!
Haiku # 807, November 26, 1998 6:00 am ET
by Anna
I tried to e-mail
gloriously bad haiku
"Transfer Interrupt!" Shit.
Haiku # 806, November 26, 1998 12:22 am ET
by Nunya Bidness of Whereever,
She loved my poems,
poured me drinks and never bitched.
I should have kept her.
Haiku # 805, November 25, 1998 11:23 pm ET
by bakai
I am so damn bored -- Changed my internet home page to Heaven's Gate Web Site.
Haiku # 804, November 25, 1998 11:14 pm ET
by Nunya Bidness of Hale-Bopp, Galaxy
SHE SMELL SO BAD YES
I ALMOST NOT EAT
OK SHE FINE NOW!
Haiku # 803, November 25, 1998 9:25 pm ET
by OWLMAN of kc, usa
look out the window
can the weatherman predict
better than tarot?
Haiku # 802, November 25, 1998 8:37 pm ET
by ashley of sydney, Oz
pass them fuckin peas
pass them fuckin potatoes
happy thanksgiving
Haiku # 801, November 25, 1998 1:33 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
Toilet is broken
Landlady is so lazy
I pee in her yard
Haiku # 800, November 25, 1998 5:25 am ET
by Jim of Gadsden, USA
Ice Cold Forty Ounce
Piss Puke Cum Sleep Cigarette
Quench Dark phallic Thirst
Haiku # 799, November 24, 1998 8:30 pm ET
by Mack Rodbro of Chi-Town, USA
Marriage bonds don't last,
But a year, or sometimes two
Let's use Super Glue!
Haiku # 798, November 24, 1998 4:05 pm ET
by P.Keller
Isolation air
table breathes like Darth Vader
when you lean on it.
Haiku # 797, November 24, 1998 2:55 pm ET
by Intern
Internet porn, thou
art a villainous scourge 'pon
my soul. And too slow.
Haiku # 796, November 24, 1998 1:51 pm ET
by Intern
smelled my chair's cushion
after working here two years
please infer the rest
Haiku # 795, November 24, 1998 11:59 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
dear Agent Scully
you're so hot I'd volunteer
for an autopsy
Haiku # 794, November 23, 1998 3:23 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
Lenny Kravitz, I
want you to get away too
Fly far away. Now.
Haiku # 793, November 23, 1998 11:02 am ET
by Intern
Covered in cow drool
Today I learnt to ignore
Yesterday
Haiku # 792, November 23, 1998 6:22 am ET
by Reverend Jim of London , UK
solid gold auto six hundred feet per gallon gets soft in the sun
Haiku # 791, November 23, 1998 1:12 am ET
by HB
Rain, Rain, Rain, Rain, Rain
Easier to face winter
If planning Mex trip
Haiku # 790, November 22, 1998 11:41 pm ET
by Alex of No City,
Rev'rund Jim nicht Deutsch
Arbeit Macht Frei. Was Arben?
Arbey's macht Roast Beef
Haiku # 789, November 22, 1998 11:36 pm ET
by Alex
Lie down in a field.
Cows will come up to lick you.
Why won
Haiku # 788, November 22, 1998 11:11 am ET
by Reverend Jim of London , UK
Sing with dyslexics:
Haiku # 787, November 22, 1998 10:52 am ET
by Reverend Jim of Jonestown, Guatemala
pull on the joystick
feeding up elevator
as i soar skywards
Haiku # 786, November 22, 1998 5:36 am ET
by ashley of sydney, Oz
There are many fish
in the sea but I am not
a fisher man though
Haiku # 785, November 21, 1998 8:33 am ET
by Elubia Oomfufu Phalange
in throes of passion
although it wasn't my aim
i fucked my back
Haiku # 784, November 21, 1998 1:18 am ET
by ashley of sydney, Oz
Some of these haiku
are cleaver or erotic
others, just profane
Haiku # 783, November 20, 1998 9:13 pm ET
by L. D. A. of Cloverdale, USA
Stop complaining, eh?
It'll get you nowhere fast
You're just a fuckwit
Haiku # 782, November 20, 1998 6:05 pm ET
by Anna
Sit! Sit, dammit Sit!
Sit down! Sit! Want a treat? Sit!!!
All right, fuck you, Ma
Haiku # 781, November 20, 1998 2:46 pm ET
by Eddie Futch
Dismiss frustration
Strike at grand truths throughfits of
Curiosity
Haiku # 780, November 20, 1998 2:41 pm ET
by Eddie Futch
serious actor
removes his teeth with pliers
to play an old man
Haiku # 779, November 20, 1998 12:36 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
lost that great job when
my boss caught me smoking pot
while fucking his wife
Haiku # 778, November 20, 1998 12:35 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
romantic dinner:
sixteen sunfish, some dead leaves,
and strawberry milk
Haiku # 777, November 20, 1998 12:33 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
Work harder, scum! Or
You'll regret it. Remember
Arben macht temp staff!
Haiku # 776, November 20, 1998 12:23 pm ET
by Reverend Jim of London, UK
Radical priests know
It's an adrenaline rite!!
Extreme Unction! Woaaah!!!
Haiku # 775, November 20, 1998 12:13 pm ET
by Reverend Jim of London, UK
Real bad vacation
Where the hell is everyone?
"Oh, Hi, Gilligan
Haiku # 774, November 20, 1998 10:48 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Go right ahead, friend
Get right up into my face
Spit on me you whore
Haiku # 773, November 20, 1998 10:26 am ET
by jon
and another thing
i almost forgot to say
whatdoyoucallit?
Haiku # 772, November 20, 1998 10:03 am ET
by noone
Cynical work bitch,
I'd pay to see someone kick
you right in the smush
Haiku # 771, November 20, 1998 9:59 am ET
by Intern
If the Fonz was so
Cool, how come he hung out with
Fuckwits like Potzy?
Haiku # 770, November 20, 1998 9:22 am ET
by Reverend Jim of London, UK
Now, that's not to say
You should put on blue pants,but
Use your fucking head
Haiku # 769, November 20, 1998 8:32 am ET
by Skip Diiskun
Dum dum dum dum dum
Dum dum dum dum dum dum dum
Smoke on the water.



Haiku # 768, November 20, 1998 7:32 am ET
by RrrrrrrRRR Guest of London, UK
Bad haiku is good.
Oxymoronic? wise? Ahhh!
Think about it! Ahhhhhhhhh!
Haiku # 767, November 20, 1998 5:31 am ET
by Fingers McPhee of London, UK
Velvet Underground
From Sweet Jane to Candy Says
This band rocks my world
Haiku # 766, November 20, 1998 5:29 am ET
by Anna
Where are you tonight?
Spinning in circles no doubt
On auto pilot
Haiku # 765, November 20, 1998 5:18 am ET
by Anna
Am I lonesome now?
Yes, I am lonesome tonight
Thank you, internet
Haiku # 764, November 20, 1998 4:35 am ET
by O Solo Mio of Concord, USA
Over vinyards flock
fluttering wings of starlings.
Aerobatic flight.
Haiku # 763, November 20, 1998 12:49 am ET
by L. D. A. of Cloverdale, U. S. A.
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