I am so damn bored -- Changed my internet home page to Heaven's Gate Web Site.
by Nunya Bidness of Hale-Bopp, Galaxy 
 
			
SHE SMELL SO BAD YES 
 I ALMOST NOT EAT
OK SHE FINE NOW!
by OWLMAN of kc, usa 
 
			
look out the window
can the weatherman predict
better than tarot?
by ashley of sydney, Oz 
 
			
pass them fuckin peas
 pass them fuckin potatoes
 happy thanksgiving
by Hollywood Bonfire
 
			
Toilet is broken
 Landlady is so lazy
 I pee in her yard
by Jim of Gadsden, USA 
 
			
Ice Cold Forty Ounce
 Piss Puke Cum Sleep Cigarette
 Quench Dark phallic Thirst
by Mack Rodbro of Chi-Town, USA 
 
			
Marriage bonds don't last, 
 But a year, or sometimes two
 Let's use Super Glue!
by P.Keller
 
			
Isolation air
 table breathes like Darth Vader
 when you lean on it.
by Intern
 
			
Internet porn, thou
 art a villainous scourge 'pon
 my soul.  And too slow.
by Intern
 
			
smelled my chair's cushion
 after working here two years
 please infer the rest
 
by Hollywood Bonfire
 
			
dear Agent Scully
  you're so hot I'd volunteer
for an autopsy
by Hollywood Bonfire
 
			
Lenny Kravitz, I
  want you to get away too
  Fly far away.  Now.
by Intern
 
			
Covered in cow drool
  Today I learnt to ignore
   Yesterday
by Reverend Jim of London , UK 
 
			
solid gold auto  six hundred feet per gallon  gets soft in the sun
by HB
 
			
Rain, Rain, Rain, Rain, Rain
  Easier to face winter
  If planning Mex trip
by Alex of No City, 
 
			
Rev'rund Jim nicht Deutsch
  Arbeit Macht Frei. Was Arben?
  Arbey's macht Roast Beef
by Alex
 
			
Lie down in a field.
  Cows will come up to lick you.
  Why won
by Reverend Jim of London , UK 
 
			
Sing with dyslexics: 
by Reverend Jim of Jonestown, Guatemala 
 
			
pull on the joystick
feeding up elevator
as i soar skywards
by ashley of sydney, Oz 
 
			
There are many fish
in the sea but I am not
a fisher man though
by Elubia Oomfufu Phalange
 
			
in throes of passion
although it wasn't my aim
i fucked my back
by ashley of sydney, Oz 
 
			
Some of these haiku
are cleaver or erotic
others, just profane
by L. D. A. of Cloverdale, USA 
 
			
Stop complaining, eh?
  It'll get you nowhere fast
  You're just a fuckwit
by Anna
 
			
Sit! Sit, dammit Sit! 
Sit down! Sit! Want a treat? Sit!!! 
All right, fuck you, Ma 
by Eddie Futch
 
			
Dismiss frustration 
Strike at grand truths throughfits of 
Curiosity 
by Eddie Futch
 
			
serious actor
removes his teeth with pliers
to play an old man
by Hollywood Bonfire
 
			
lost that great job when
  my boss caught me smoking pot
while fucking his wife
by Hollywood Bonfire
 
			
romantic dinner:
sixteen sunfish, some dead leaves,
and strawberry milk
by Hollywood Bonfire
 
			
Work harder, scum! Or 
  You'll regret it. Remember
  Arben macht temp staff!
by Reverend Jim of London, UK 
 
			
Radical priests know
It's an adrenaline rite!!
Extreme Unction! Woaaah!!!
by Reverend Jim of London, UK 
 
			
Real bad vacation
Where the hell is everyone?
 "Oh, Hi, Gilligan
by Anonymous Poet
 
			
Go right ahead, friend
Get right up into my face
Spit on me you whore
by jon
 
			
and another thing
  i almost forgot to say
  whatdoyoucallit?
by noone
 
			
Cynical work bitch,
I'd pay to see someone kick
you right in the smush
by Intern
 
			
If the Fonz was so 
Cool, how come he hung out with 
Fuckwits like Potzy?
by Reverend Jim of London, UK 
 
			
Now, that's not to say
You should put on blue pants,but
  Use your fucking head
by Skip Diiskun
 
			
Dum dum dum dum dum
Dum dum dum dum dum dum dum 
Smoke on the water. 
by RrrrrrrRRR Guest of London, UK 
 
			
Bad haiku is good. 
  Oxymoronic? wise? Ahhh! 
  Think about it! Ahhhhhhhhh!
by Fingers McPhee of London, UK 
 
			
Velvet Underground
  From Sweet Jane to Candy Says
  This band rocks my world
by Anna
 
			
Where are you tonight?
  Spinning in circles no doubt
  On auto pilot
by Anna
 
			
Am I lonesome now?
  Yes, I am lonesome tonight
  Thank you, internet
by O Solo Mio of Concord, USA 
 
			
Over vinyards flock
fluttering wings of starlings.
Aerobatic flight.
by L. D. A. of Cloverdale, U. S. A. 
 
			
YOU THINK YOUR LIFE SUCKS?
  WELL IT DOES, SO YOU ARE RIGHT  
  WHEW! SUCKS TO BE YOU!
by MICHELLE of PITTSBURGH, USA 
 
			
I DO SO HATE MEN
MAYBE I SHOULD CONSIDER
FINDING A GIRLFRIEND
by MICHELLE of PITTSBURGH, USA 
 
			
Hey pretty birdie
Perched high upon the treetop
Please don't poop on me
by Anna
 
			
counting syllables
i had a slight problem there
so sue me okay
by a fan
 
			
hollywood bonfire
i enjoy your haiku, but
you are one sick puppy
by a fan
 
			
hollywood bonfire
i enjoy your haiku, but
you are one sick puppy
by a fan
 
			
Squirrels eating nuts
If they only knew the truth
They're all gonna die
by I.McSuccor of Sarasota, USA 
 
			
Flying bananas
Have stained the walls around me
Stale, mushy debris
by Anna