Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
25 Years, 271 Days and 75948 Haiku later...

A sewage puddle
surrounded by tin-roof shacks.
Third-world. It's . . . VIBRANT.
Haiku # 75909, July 25, 2022 4:34 pm ET
by Papa Doc of Saint Ouverture
Things are not so bad
Unless you live in Haiti
Forgot about that
Haiku # 75908, July 25, 2022 12:57 am ET
by Do people like things?
I ask: “Who’s on first?”
Almost got to first base once.
(with Darth Figpucker)
Haiku # 75907, July 24, 2022 1:55 am ET
by All Stars of Haiku
Elvis is the king.
Velvet voice of Rock'nRoll:
Declan McManus
Haiku # 75906, July 24, 2022 12:42 am ET
by Bud Abbot of Lou Costello
Jerry Lee Lewis...
His cousin Jimmy Swaggart.
So- what does this mean?
Haiku # 75905, July 24, 2022 12:16 am ET
by Open-ended Madness of Haiku
Overthinking it:
Mention old boomer movies...
Identify self.
Haiku # 75904, July 24, 2022 12:13 am ET
by Born in Postwar of Pre-cybernetics
Hiker in distress
“Coyote tried to blow me”
“Ran off with my dick!”
Haiku # 75903, July 23, 2022 9:55 pm ET
by Emoji of Babaganoush
Henry Fonda’s corpse
lifts from the murky bottom
of this Golden Pond
Haiku # 75902, July 23, 2022 8:04 pm ET
by Listen Listen of Who’s Pissin’?
Tickling the ivories
Tickling cousin clitoris
Jerry Lee Lewis
Haiku # 75901, July 23, 2022 7:54 am ET
by Incest of Underwater
a piano falls into the old pond --
F-sharp Major
Haiku # 75900, July 23, 2022 1:17 am ET
by Sprogvader of イングランド
end of spring --
the moonlight dries my hair
Haiku # 75899, July 23, 2022 1:08 am ET
by Sprogvader of イングランド
Dead husband money
Some slip on banana peels
Some will fall of cliffs
Haiku # 75898, July 22, 2022 10:30 am ET
by Myriad of Options
Fuck that should have been
Man BOOBS, autocorrect sucks ass
Five more syllables
Haiku # 75897, July 22, 2022 8:47 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
What about man books?
Sometimes unavoidable
Too much Del Taco
Haiku # 75896, July 22, 2022 8:44 am ET
by Manboob Appreciation Committee
We need more DADS now!
Young men need a role model.
But no dads with tits...
Haiku # 75895, July 21, 2022 4:50 pm ET
by Matriarchal Malarkey of Intertoobz of Boobz
Well, that explains it.
He was a crummy father
and he’d screw a cat
Haiku # 75894, July 21, 2022 4:15 pm ET
by Butter of Paws
dad says i'm a slut
technically my step dad
also a toaster
Haiku # 75893, July 21, 2022 10:05 am ET
by bread of butter face
Ash!!!!! How have you been?
Look, there's no spam in these parts.
That's all that is new.
Haiku # 75892, July 20, 2022 8:49 pm ET
by Janis of It's hot here
i am old and tired
but poetry makes my young
grandma has a cock
Haiku # 75891, July 20, 2022 8:47 pm ET
by ash
been away long time
yet haiku remains within
basho my brains out
Haiku # 75890, July 20, 2022 8:46 pm ET
by ash
iT'S A GAS GAS GAS.
jUMPING jACK fLUSH DON'T CHA KNOW.
(qUIT GASLIGHTING ME)
Haiku # 75889, July 20, 2022 5:14 pm ET
by Haiku McHike
Let’s never forget the Loudest Fart in the World
Herkimer, New York
Haiku # 75888, July 20, 2022 7:03 am ET
by Gas of Yesteryear
The poets on here
write interesting poetry
but don’t always flush
Haiku # 75887, July 20, 2022 2:38 am ET
by Janitor of Can
Have you considered
ordering Apocalypse Meals?
They come in buckets
Haiku # 75884, July 19, 2022 12:58 am ET
by long of Pig
Our days are now spent.
Climbing the haiku mountain
was only a dream.
Haiku # 75883, July 17, 2022 12:11 am ET
by Peak of Clouds and Distant Mountain Ranges
A drowning man will clutch at a straw Link to proverb.
There's many a good tune played on an old fiddle.
Ain't over till the fat lady sings - It.
Hold with the hare and run with the hounds - You can't.
Bread always falls buttered side down Link to proverb.
The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.
Let the dead bury the dead.
Haiku # 75882, July 15, 2022 11:09 am ET
by DavidDepsy of Norfolk Island
It's a good thing, no?
All poetry and not spam
A total arms race
Haiku # 75881, July 14, 2022 2:10 pm ET
by Webmaster of Fighting the good fight
i lose track of this
place for weeks and notice the
posts are all haiku
Haiku # 75880, July 14, 2022 11:27 am ET
by vhs of good
Big happy brown world:
Everybody gotz to TWERK
(Diversity dance.)
Haiku # 75879, July 13, 2022 10:01 am ET
by Big Fat Thing in a Thong
Georgia on my mind
Sweet peaches in summer sun...
as guidestones explode
Haiku # 75878, July 12, 2022 9:44 pm ET
by Mysterious Stranger of Depopulation Agenda
My man Kevinniz!
What up in Nigeria?
Haiku in tha house?
Haiku # 75877, July 12, 2022 1:00 pm ET
by Brianorr of Burkina Faso
Opera ain't over till the fat lady sings - The.
Marry in haste, repent at leisure Link to proverb.
Bigger, the better - The.
Make love not war.
The best things in life are free.
Every stick has two ends.
It's the empty can that makes the most noise.
Haiku # 75876, July 12, 2022 6:39 am ET
by Kevinniz of Nigeria
You are in good hands
Figpucker’s Haiku Army
will fix all that’s wrong
Haiku # 75875, July 9, 2022 8:43 pm ET
by Colonel Angus of Old Willow Boot Camp
Here comes World War 4.
They are mobilizing troops.
Grab your popcorn now.
Haiku # 75874, July 8, 2022 6:08 pm ET
by Weimar Republic of AMURIKKKKA
Dr. Bruce Banner
Excellent bedside manner
(when penis is green)
Haiku # 75872, July 7, 2022 1:37 am ET
by Bulk of Hulk
Brian Wilson’s taint
If you hold your ear up to
You’ll hear the ocean
Haiku # 75870, July 5, 2022 1:25 pm ET
by Recipient of good vibrations ( don’t stop)
Toilet left un-flushed
But when you return, it’s gone…
Turd Burglar strikes again
Haiku # 75869, July 5, 2022 1:21 pm ET
by Noticer of Details
Inhaling hot dogs
4th of July. The next morning…
Frankly… Got the runs
Haiku # 75868, July 5, 2022 1:17 pm ET
by Revenge of The Meat Byproducts
What a day for it
Firecracker ass rocket
I salute you, Darth!
Haiku # 75867, July 5, 2022 12:48 am ET
by Brown Skies of Philippines
Bamboo shoots for lunch
Then, under the fingernails
This restaurant’s torture!
Haiku # 75866, July 4, 2022 11:33 am ET
by Gordon Ramrod of Panda Pavilion
Gentle night rain falls
Upon the young bamboo grove . . .
Hey - put that down! HELP!
Haiku # 75864, July 3, 2022 8:29 am ET
by Haiku Poet 911 Recording of True Haiku Crime
I created this;
This entire haiku site.
It was not "Janis".
Haiku # 75863, July 3, 2022 8:23 am ET
by Delusions of Solipsism
We came. We saw. Then
We read one of Darth's haikus
And fart-vomited.
Haiku # 75862, July 3, 2022 8:19 am ET
by Virtually, of Course...
Haiku is the bomb.
Haiku is the witch's tit.
Haiku comes from God.
Haiku # 75861, July 3, 2022 8:15 am ET
by And It Is Almost As Fantastic As Donald Trump's Hair
My haiku blesses.
My verse is like a cool breeze
Or massive fart blast.
Haiku # 75860, July 3, 2022 8:08 am ET
by Haiku in Style of Figpucker-san
Of all shameful jobs
The most cringeworthy of all:
to WRITE about ROCK.
Haiku # 75859, July 3, 2022 8:00 am ET
by Greil Marcus of Eleanor Gerstley
Not "tragic" at all.
Kurt Cobain's suicide was
Quite hilarious.
Haiku # 75858, July 3, 2022 7:36 am ET
by Dumbass in Sweater Screaming into Mike of 1990s
Yuri Bezmenov.
He throws down tha best lyrix.
'Cause he K.G.B.
Haiku # 75857, July 2, 2022 11:08 pm ET
by Tomas Schuman of BitChute
Another haiku
Putting in my hours at
Haiku Factory
Haiku # 75856, July 1, 2022 10:46 pm ET
by CYAN hehe of Home
To Fu and Li Po
Hanging out in the washroom
There, they meet Lo Flo
Haiku # 75855, July 1, 2022 1:49 pm ET
by Mr. Floatie. (Doug) (aka Dookie) of Left behind
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