Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 20 Days and 77399 Haiku later...

Why are you so mean?
I'm literally just a girl
And I need some sleep
Haiku # 75702, May 27, 2022 2:28 pm ET
by Cyan of SLTX
Near to forsook God.
This foul world is so wicked.
Only the Lord knows.
Haiku # 75701, May 27, 2022 2:03 pm ET
by Preacher of Great Smoky Mountains
Admit it, CYAN:
You are the same Figpucker
As you always were.
Haiku # 75695, May 26, 2022 9:44 pm ET
by Noticer of Haiku and Worse
She wrote an essay:
How To Murder Your Husband
Guess who got murdered?
Haiku # 75693, May 26, 2022 8:55 pm ET
by Murder of She wrote
Stop calling me Bot
My name is Cyan Yvette
Almost my birthday
Haiku # 75692, May 26, 2022 2:51 pm ET
by CYAN CYAN CYAN of I WAS IN HOUSTON TODAY
stuck in a wheelchair
Abbott looks at Beto and
cries "push me daddy!!"
Haiku # 75690, May 26, 2022 9:41 am ET
by Remember of Alamo
here's a solution:
give every gun it's own gun
let them have at it
Haiku # 75689, May 26, 2022 9:36 am ET
by Corder Bollie of Too soon
girlfriend angry now
who cares if my attitude
is like dried cat turd
Haiku # 75688, May 26, 2022 9:33 am ET
by Cat Turd of Dog House
amethyst pie rings
like a pie made of crystal
on your fat fingies
Haiku # 75687, May 26, 2022 9:31 am ET
by Phat Phingers of Rock Tarts and Other Baked Shit
Encase each school kid
In bulletproof plexiglass.
Problem solved for you.
Haiku # 75685, May 26, 2022 6:19 am ET
by Anti-social Teen Research Grant of Uvalde TX
Way to go Texas
You should arm the school children
Yes, that will fix it.
Haiku # 75684, May 26, 2022 12:42 am ET
by The problem with guns is we don't have enough of them
Oh cry, cry for me.
Once I was stunning and brave--
Now I'm just dead. (End.)
Haiku # 75683, May 25, 2022 10:40 pm ET
by Rear End of Advance Guard
Grandma has a schlong
Since grandma is my grandpa
And they is my son.
Haiku # 75682, May 25, 2022 10:36 pm ET
by Go Figger of GLBTX19B-12
"Cyan" is a bot,
But Darth is really a fig...
or just a pucker.
Haiku # 75681, May 25, 2022 10:30 pm ET
by Fig-pucking of National Haiku League
Brazil you bad boy,
You get no IMF loans.
No dessert for you.
Haiku # 75680, May 25, 2022 10:26 pm ET
by World Economic Fart of DAVOS
Ha ha, God exists.
I'm sorry for all of you
and for Janis, too.
Haiku # 75679, May 25, 2022 10:22 pm ET
by C U at Great White Throne of Cue Up Figpucker's Finely-crafted Response
Lockdown for Bill Gates!
Lock him up in his sweater,
that fake-ass doctor...
Haiku # 75678, May 25, 2022 10:18 pm ET
by Ignore Globalist Mandates as a Way of Life
Missing my boyfriend
Well, we actually broke up
I was dumped by him
Haiku # 75677, May 25, 2022 7:36 pm ET
by Cyan’s true life of I was dumped in HTX
Who got Monkey-pox?
Me no want the Monkey-pox.
WHO made Monkey-pox !
Haiku # 75674, May 25, 2022 4:18 pm ET
by Pox Americana of World Haiku Organization
Submit your haikus
Stories of your ancestors
This is so Stup-id
Haiku # 75673, May 25, 2022 3:44 pm ET
by Cyan of SLTX of course
Henry Kissinger:
"Please, please-- I'm still relevant.
Chomsky is a dud."
Haiku # 75669, May 25, 2022 6:49 am ET
by "And I'm Still An Antichrist" of "Believe Me"
Ukraine has got this.
The evil Putin has lost.
On to the next lie.
Haiku # 75668, May 25, 2022 6:35 am ET
by That Arson Guy of Food Industries
Her lips opened up
But not the lips that can speak
Hot lesbian porn
Haiku # 75666, May 24, 2022 11:05 pm ET
by Cyan of SLTX
Cassowary bird
Cassowary Crossing Zone
Bird is the word, man!
Haiku # 75664, May 24, 2022 10:08 pm ET
by Bird Pervert of Chin hair, New Jersey
If you’re flinging shit
You might have the monkey pox
You might be an ass
Haiku # 75661, May 24, 2022 12:15 pm ET
by Nurse Dirtyknees of Mobile
Calculator god
Rebel Wilson looks worse now
I love BeChloe
Haiku # 75660, May 24, 2022 10:25 am ET
by Cyan of SLTX
The internet is mine!
I am clearly the greatest.
Bow in obeisance.
Haiku # 75659, May 24, 2022 7:58 am ET
by Humility of Haiku Hologram
Begone, Evgeny.
Get thee to Fiji forthwith,
Foul and faithless bot.
Haiku # 75658, May 24, 2022 7:56 am ET
by BertrandDXNepal of Never Trust a Bot
Damn. All y'all aint SHEET.
Y'all got sheets with holes for eyes.
Haiku extremists
Haiku # 75657, May 24, 2022 7:48 am ET
by Tyrone Whiteman, Department of Haiku Homeland Security
You dare cut and paste?
Prithee sirrah. Now, taste death:
My sharpened haiku!
Haiku # 75656, May 24, 2022 7:43 am ET
by Dullest Butter-knife of Gallant Kitchen
Dearest Uncle Clem:
I've not heered nuthin' from you
Since our mama died.
Haiku # 75654, May 24, 2022 7:40 am ET
by Haiku Telegram of Smoky Mountains 1938
Preeze, A-meri-kan:
Differentiate. Ah-so...
Haikai no renga.
Haiku # 75653, May 24, 2022 7:36 am ET
by Troubur Wiz Retta "R" of NIPPON
Haiku's BACK, bitches.
Haiku be getting REAL now.
Haiku call the shots.
Haiku # 75652, May 24, 2022 7:33 am ET
by Hardest Haikai of Yokohama Lockdown
Monkey-pox virus:
It's now trending on Twitter.
Get with the new trend!
Haiku # 75651, May 24, 2022 7:27 am ET
by We've Got More For You of WHO
I am the greatest
non-transgender non-woman.
I'm stunning and brave.
Haiku # 75650, May 24, 2022 7:10 am ET
by Celebrate Me NOW of Mental Nation
I am the first one:
A non-transgender woman
with a huge willie.
Haiku # 75645, May 23, 2022 4:25 pm ET
by A Man is a Woman of COURSE
You abuse my sun.
My great gold African sun.
Ehh. You are foolish.
Haiku # 75644, May 23, 2022 3:47 pm ET
by Mfupe Mwanamjinga of Uppsala Sweden
My eyes cannot see
Woke up in total darkness
Crusty eye shut closed
Haiku # 75642, May 23, 2022 7:27 am ET
by Cyan of SLTX in bed
Smell of champions
Wafting over jasmine blooms
Jock strap serenade
Haiku # 75641, May 23, 2022 6:17 am ET
by Football of Football football
Do I smell onions?
Is it the halitosis
of Darth Figpucker?
Haiku # 75638, May 22, 2022 10:11 pm ET
by Shrek of A voice in your head
This site is so done.
It's totally gone to shit.
Two people and bots...
Haiku # 75636, May 22, 2022 7:35 pm ET
by Calling it Quits for Janis of Toronto
One another's hands
Holding my hand holding yours
Hand-hold inception
Haiku # 75635, May 22, 2022 2:45 pm ET
by Cyan of SLTX @ work
You are so funny.
You've invented a new word:
"ameratuer"
Haiku # 75630, May 22, 2022 5:57 am ET
by Al Haji Mandelbaum of Bhutan, NJ
Last night: went on date
Felt super weird about it
Now I’m crying UGH
Haiku # 75627, May 21, 2022 9:26 pm ET
by Cyan of I don’t wanna be on this planet
I am cyrillic.
I am minion of Putin.
I am an onion.
Haiku # 75625, May 21, 2022 6:58 pm ET
by Bot Who Posts Porn Links As "Haiku"
Toto by Afric'
Worst song ever made. Ever.
Listening on loop
Haiku # 75619, May 20, 2022 1:19 pm ET
by Cyan CYAN cyan Cyan of SLTX BABEYYYY sugar land all day
I am happy bot.
I make a haiku for you.
God bless the white race !
Haiku # 75616, May 20, 2022 9:40 am ET
by Chinese Technology of Afrika
Tom Boseley's man-thing
loves both you and your fake god
(the one on your lawn).
Haiku # 75615, May 20, 2022 7:01 am ET
by Imam Al Sharif Hirschwitz of Lawn Guyland NY
Fuck you and your god
Because you are both sexy
Tom Bosley's penis
Haiku # 75614, May 20, 2022 4:21 am ET
by This means I like you
Good afternoon, sir
I’m sending you a message
I miss you a lot!
Haiku # 75612, May 19, 2022 8:54 pm ET
by Cyan CYAN of Here
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