Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 21 Days and 77400 Haiku later...

Why do you haiku?
Something to do While you poo?
You know it is true
Haiku # 75099, March 9, 2022 9:43 am ET
by Gildon Bert
High ku, lo ku-ku
Waikiki or why haiku
Haiku you, we high.
Haiku # 75098, March 8, 2022 10:12 pm ET
by Don Gilbert of Internet
I'm "devastated"
And I am "heartbroken" too.
(The George Soros show).
Haiku # 75095, March 8, 2022 8:56 am ET
by Strictly Re-runs of Hungary
Best Birdseed Breakfast
West of the Rocky Mountains
Stick that in your beak
Haiku # 75094, March 8, 2022 7:19 am ET
by Tip of my beak
A bowel movement
consisting of syllables
is headed your way
Haiku # 75093, March 8, 2022 5:48 am ET
by Glory of Morning
Russia has the bomb
Vladimir wants to use it
Paranoid nut job
Haiku # 75092, March 7, 2022 10:52 pm ET
by He's so short, hung like gerbil
Russia is the BOMB.
Vladimir is our savior!
He is superman.
Haiku # 75091, March 7, 2022 5:33 pm ET
by And Mr. P is Super-sexy too
Russia sucks dog balls
Talk about third world shit holes
Corrupted leader
Haiku # 75090, March 7, 2022 10:07 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Imprint of a boot
All of that moon shit was fake
We were playing space.
Haiku # 75088, March 7, 2022 1:18 am ET
by Noticer of Dusty Footprint improperly cooked N.Y. Strip steak( Encino)
Wail hay thar. Hit's me,
Yer ole knuckle-draggin frind...
So LET's GO BRANDON !
Haiku # 75087, March 6, 2022 10:18 pm ET
by Klaus Schwab of Old Smoky Mountains
Free crackpipe sandwich!
Poupon your roast beast! Slathered!
Fifty shards of Darth!
Haiku # 75086, March 6, 2022 7:03 pm ET
by Calling my Lawyer of Immediately
That's packing a lunch!
Fifty shades of Grey Poupon.
Slathered on Roast Beast.
Haiku # 75085, March 6, 2022 5:55 pm ET
by Luncheon of Holiday Inn , Encino, California
I prefer sandwich
Stuffed full of tasty goodness
Like your mom's buttocks
Haiku # 75084, March 6, 2022 5:45 pm ET
by Pervert Dinosaur
The free crack pipe lie?
Shut up and kiss Mike Lindell
And drop your pants
Haiku # 75082, March 6, 2022 9:59 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Yes, Agrohimnee.
I will bring device to Kiev.
You have timer codes?
Haiku # 75081, March 5, 2022 8:25 am ET
by Marilyn Ninna of Humanitarian Non-profit Troll Farm
Stop your squawking, friend.
It's time for Birdie num nums.
It's time to party
Haiku # 75078, March 4, 2022 9:08 pm ET
by Noticer of num nums
Biden: free crack pipes.
Russia: invade the Ukraine.
C.I.A: "We win!"
Haiku # 75077, March 4, 2022 12:03 pm ET
by Chants of "Let's Go BRANDON !"
Put in your two cents
You will receive one haiku
and two freeze dried farts
Haiku # 75075, March 3, 2022 11:42 pm ET
by Deal of The Day
Put in then put out.
Put up or shut up. Haiku:
What we want from you.
Haiku # 75073, March 3, 2022 8:25 pm ET
by Volodimir of Vladimir
if you're feeling red
and you want your neighbours dead
putin on the blitz
Haiku # 75072, March 3, 2022 6:20 am ET
by ash of get back in the ussr
The moon is old cheese
From the moon, the cheese tides swell
Blame Darth for the smell
Haiku # 75069, March 2, 2022 2:30 am ET
by Songs of The Fig Pluckers
Faint tinkling of tune...
You will piss like a monsoon
The ladies will swoon
Haiku # 75068, March 2, 2022 12:30 am ET
by Noticer of Biology
You in the cocoon
Dangling all aglow with moon
When do you bust out?
Haiku # 75067, March 1, 2022 10:58 pm ET
by Noticer of Details
I crane, you crane, we
all crane for Ukraine. Put in
a bit more effort.
Haiku # 75066, March 1, 2022 7:10 am ET
by Kenneth Affok of Россия
The Beak of the Week
Do any birds have big dinks?
Flightless ones, perhaps
Haiku # 75065, March 1, 2022 1:21 am ET
by 65th 75th ex of Manmoth, New Jersey
The world will be gone
before the chrysalis pops.
Better to be dead.
Haiku # 75064, February 28, 2022 2:07 am ET
by SLOTHMAN
I awoke once more
With that music heart feeling
Mind orchestra plays
Back Where I Belong
By Baroness (post chorus)
As I think of her
Spacetime's been weaving
An emotion tapestry
And I realize
Stunned hyperventilating:
This is my cocoon
Grown over new wings
That now grow, fill with my blood
Soon... I seek the moon
Haiku # 75063, February 28, 2022 12:00 am ET
by MANMOTH of Hanging upside down from a little branch, throbbing slightly but hopefully not enough to attract predators
Uncomfortably numb
He said that it was put in
I didn't feel it
Haiku # 75060, February 26, 2022 3:46 pm ET
by Melania Trump of USA
I am too boring
To putin any effort.
So I invade you.
Haiku # 75059, February 26, 2022 2:30 pm ET
by Noticer of Vladimir's Mother
Enlighten yourself
Put in some effort for once
You are so boring
Haiku # 75058, February 26, 2022 1:28 pm ET
by Bye bye
Got better lies, you?
Have you transcended their lies?
So enlighten me.
Haiku # 75057, February 26, 2022 11:46 am ET
by Your Disciple of Lies
Lies are all you have
So desperate, you believe
So they give you more
Haiku # 75056, February 26, 2022 9:26 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Biden's son got rich
On Ukraine energy board.
Crack cocaine. Hookers.
Haiku # 75055, February 25, 2022 11:07 pm ET
by Take Administrators Seriously of HA HA HAHA HA HAHA
Corporate data:
Technocratic death-in-life.
Just say "NO" to beast.
Haiku # 75054, February 25, 2022 1:38 pm ET
by Revelation of Global Techno-tyranny
Corporate pastel:
Those flat clip-art office scenes...
Data-driven death.
Haiku # 75053, February 24, 2022 4:36 pm ET
by Noticer of Mass Death
Look, up in the sky!
It's a bird, it's a plane, it's...
Someone noticing.
Haiku # 75049, February 23, 2022 1:46 pm ET
by Quack
The tide brings garbage.
From the moon the tides arise.
So we blame the moon.
Haiku # 75048, February 23, 2022 6:19 am ET
by .
Frogs singing loudly.
Vibrations open gateways.
A good place to be.
Haiku # 75047, February 23, 2022 6:15 am ET
by .
There is no TP.
But do not worry, Beavis;
Just use the bidet.
Haiku # 75046, February 23, 2022 5:20 am ET
by Dish sprayer. of Clean enough to eat off of.
Cat poop's better than
Toblerone or Tootsie Rolls.
That's what's in my head.
Haiku # 75045, February 23, 2022 5:14 am ET
by Star Wars pinata.
I notice that you
assume more than you notice.
Look to other side.

With all your power,
please destroy the evil one.
And don't dis Jesus.
Haiku # 75044, February 23, 2022 4:58 am ET
by Just don't
Back to bowel movements:
Darth returns to his first love.
And we are impressed.
Haiku # 75043, February 22, 2022 11:00 pm ET
by Noticer of Excremental Health Facility
The first Tootsie Roll
wasn't shaped like Toblerone
More like cat feces
Haiku # 75042, February 22, 2022 8:22 pm ET
by Worshipper of Cats
King Tut's last BM
wrapped up in toilet paper
A yummy mummie
Haiku # 75041, February 22, 2022 8:19 pm ET
by King Tuutsie of Mens Room (Pyramid)
made it to the end
and asked Jesus what he liked
"old, tired tart carts"
Haiku # 75040, February 22, 2022 7:30 pm ET
by the other apostle of he never did much
Delegitimize!
Reify ontologies!
Decentralize truth!
Haiku # 75039, February 22, 2022 5:56 pm ET
by Noticer of Hermeneutic Implosion
Hey y’all I’m back now
Hotel room 117
I’m so freaking bored
Haiku # 75038, February 22, 2022 4:36 pm ET
by I’m also FREAKING OUT of Cyan
Goodbye bad haiku!
We had some good and bad times
I will miss this world
Haiku # 75037, February 22, 2022 11:43 am ET
by Cyan <3 of Here
Marxism doesn't care.
It will use you. Chew you up
And then spit you out.
Haiku # 75036, February 22, 2022 9:31 am ET
by Noticer of Dialectical Materialism
Bots cannot repent.
Jesus did not die for bots.
You are not a bot.
Haiku # 75035, February 22, 2022 9:27 am ET
by Noticer of Bots
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