Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 65 Days and 77461 Haiku later...

that ain't PB, girl!
oh sure, it's sweet and sticky
but it's something else...
Haiku # 7417, March 19, 2001 6:26 pm ET
by the fourth way of seattle
your name is a lie
I haven't seen any butt!
where are my 9 moons?
Haiku # 7416, March 19, 2001 6:25 pm ET
by the fourth way of seattle
This, peanut butter,
is the most marvelous of
Mother Earth's yummies.
Haiku # 7415, March 19, 2001 6:23 pm ET
by 9thmoon of Seattle
the 9th vampire
here she comes, scared of ol Sol.
Go to the light, girl
Haiku # 7414, March 19, 2001 6:22 pm ET
by the fourth way of seattle
Oh, no, the sun breaks!
Run away, run away, hide!
The sun hurts my skin.
Haiku # 7413, March 19, 2001 6:20 pm ET
by 9thmoon of Seattle
murder/suicide
with explosive lipstick on.
give me a big kiss
Haiku # 7412, March 19, 2001 5:55 pm ET
by the fourth way of seattle
tap my frozen balls
with a solid sledgehammer
watch them crack open
Haiku # 7411, March 19, 2001 5:50 pm ET
by The Fourth Way of seattle
Am I working now?
No, I post bad haiku for you.
Procrastinaiku.
Haiku # 7410, March 19, 2001 5:48 pm ET
by Teacher
roll the window down
-cool night air is curious
maynard & deftones
Haiku # 7409, March 19, 2001 5:48 pm ET
by the fourth way of seattle
Bowels constricting,
you're in proximilitude
to my requesticles.
Haiku # 7408, March 19, 2001 5:46 pm ET
by Priest
I want to get close
Closer and closer to your
Proximilitude.
Haiku # 7407, March 19, 2001 5:44 pm ET
by Teacher
Things are getting worse
Each passing moment it gains
Horriblocity.
Haiku # 7406, March 19, 2001 5:43 pm ET
by Teacher
Intestines vibrate
With the vigor of the vicar
I'm not built for this.
Haiku # 7405, March 19, 2001 5:42 pm ET
by Priest
Make the lie a truth
If you bend it enough you
Veracificate.
Haiku # 7404, March 19, 2001 5:42 pm ET
by Teacher
I quit my
job today! hooray,
finally
Haiku # 7403, March 19, 2001 5:38 pm ET
by redbeard
I quit my
job today! hooray,
finally
Haiku # 7402, March 19, 2001 5:37 pm ET
by redbeard
To Miss Everything
Tie dying while high flying
Altitudinous.
Haiku # 7401, March 19, 2001 5:26 pm ET
by Teacher
Some in sarcasm say how can this be
A haiku - your syllables are all wrong
And I say, read it in Japanese, man.
Haiku # 7400, March 19, 2001 5:25 pm ET
by Teacher
high speed fecal spray
jet-splatters the zoo keeper
sleeping aft dumbo
Haiku # 7399, March 19, 2001 5:24 pm ET
by Drophammer
hey, teach-

since when do the old
and sickly fashion tie-dyes
in memorium?
Haiku # 7398, March 19, 2001 5:22 pm ET
by Miss Everything of not in school
Clench, unclench, release.
Such is the way of nature.
Flow with the fluid.
Haiku # 7397, March 19, 2001 5:22 pm ET
by Drophammer
Someone yells, "Catch this!"
As they toss the grenade's pin,
poor stupid person.
Haiku # 7396, March 19, 2001 5:14 pm ET
by Priest
Hearts are learning how
To spell "dying" with a 'Y'
As it should be done.
Haiku # 7395, March 19, 2001 5:11 pm ET
by English Teacher
His mouth hangs open
No words spoken, empty
They are too impure.
Haiku # 7394, March 19, 2001 5:10 pm ET
by Priest
spring fever

hearts are laughing
but there's no joy in Mudville
hearts are crying

hearts are cheering
Mighty Casey has struck out
hearts are dieing
Haiku # 7393, March 19, 2001 5:09 pm ET
by Miss Everything
Stars I have, countless
I see them all, why cower
and hide from the light?
Haiku # 7392, March 19, 2001 5:09 pm ET
by Priest
Animal butt funk
Like a deranged Godfather
Of Soul with clench-marks
Haiku # 7391, March 19, 2001 5:02 pm ET
by Drophammer
my spark is your star
unreached, unattainable
you can not have this
Haiku # 7390, March 19, 2001 4:59 pm ET
by thegrue of here. right here. bring it on.
Intellectuals
Crave what they've driven away
The spark is hiding.
Haiku # 7389, March 19, 2001 4:49 pm ET
by Priest
id ego super-
ego, where have they gone to?
badhaikudotcom
Haiku # 7388, March 19, 2001 4:46 pm ET
by hola of fearing for my life
To Stang: Funk I have,
Thick Funk by the bucketful
Alas, none to share.
Haiku # 7387, March 19, 2001 4:45 pm ET
by Priest
i think there's a word
for folks who post such haiku:
they're called freudian.
Haiku # 7386, March 19, 2001 4:45 pm ET
by thegrue of down the hall from hola
I am protesting
the use of such pure haiku
for haiku like these
Haiku # 7385, March 19, 2001 4:44 pm ET
by hola of fearing for my life
Creativity
Springs not from the clenched sphincter
But from a free mind.
Haiku # 7384, March 19, 2001 4:43 pm ET
by Priest
I oppose no art
No art do I oppose, it's
only bad haiku
Haiku # 7383, March 19, 2001 4:43 pm ET
by hola of fearing for my life
constancy is life
purest beauty, i crave your
animal butt funk
Haiku # 7382, March 19, 2001 4:22 pm ET
by Stang mk.1
that's what she asked in
a fouler mood when I was
bored and just lonely

them bisexuals
in chat rooms I guess scared me
today, I think, now
Haiku # 7381, March 19, 2001 4:14 pm ET
by Moxie of don't pm me
Cannibal Bob says,
What should I think when you say,
Eat me! Eat me! Now!
Haiku # 7380, March 19, 2001 4:13 pm ET
by Hung Lo Pan
All who oppose art
Even the stanky verse here
Should be more childlike.
Haiku # 7379, March 19, 2001 4:10 pm ET
by Drophammer
we have so much time
it seems, waste it on jokes which
a toddler could make
Haiku # 7378, March 19, 2001 3:48 pm ET
by Styx of Marrickville, Australia
Time has no hold on
My high pressure ass fluids
Stand back, open wide
Haiku # 7377, March 19, 2001 3:38 pm ET
by Solace of MI
Fuck-ed Company
Digital Schadenfreude
Here's the e-cession
Haiku # 7376, March 19, 2001 3:36 pm ET
by kemokid of SF
I go to the fridge
looking for butt sweat, all gone!
Solace drank it all
Haiku # 7375, March 19, 2001 3:32 pm ET
by Saint
your bad haiku's cruel.
sick to the smell to the sight.
offensive sucks bad.
Haiku # 7374, March 19, 2001 3:30 pm ET
by thegrue of hiding
i have a pussy,
infected finger. it needs
some medication
Haiku # 7373, March 19, 2001 3:28 pm ET
by the fourth way of seattle
Sleeping roommate snores
Ether and cloth keeps status quo
as nitrates are applied
Haiku # 7372, March 19, 2001 3:26 pm ET
by BattlePuppy of MI
hey, what was that noise?
Ok, quit playing around...
Bobby??.....is that you?
Haiku # 7371, March 19, 2001 3:20 pm ET
by the fourth way of seattle
damn double postings
damn double postings. I hate
when that happens. I
Haiku # 7370, March 19, 2001 3:17 pm ET
by The Fourth Way of seattle
Lets propose a toast!
"To explosive wine glasses"
"here here!, here here!"......clink
Haiku # 7369, March 19, 2001 3:13 pm ET
by The Fourth Way of seattle
Lets propose a toast!
"To explosive wine glasses"
"here here!, here here!"......clink
Haiku # 7368, March 19, 2001 3:12 pm ET
by The Fourth Way of seattle
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