Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 243 Days and 77168 Haiku later...

Much in the same way
we destroyed the Amazon,
it's destroying us.
Haiku # 73581, November 14, 2021 12:07 pm ET
by Oh good! My order of Sea Monkey jizz extract just arrived!
I think Jeff Bezos
is buying up Hawaii.
So, yeah, possible.
Haiku # 73580, November 14, 2021 10:25 am ET
by What would you do if you owned the world? of Start a pandemic?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know.
Every is TWO syllables.
Don't say "ever-ree".
Haiku # 73579, November 14, 2021 10:23 am ET
by Webster's plaid pants.
fantasy island
i wonder if anyone
asked the caretaker

my fantasy is
to have an island like yours
can you do this sir?
Haiku # 73578, November 14, 2021 10:21 am ET
by vhs of ze plane ze plane!
Scooby Doo is dumb.
Same effing plot every week.
But I'd bang Velma.
Haiku # 73577, November 14, 2021 10:18 am ET
by Right.
"Thundercats!" (times three).
Mummra's homosexual;
still in the closet.
Haiku # 73576, November 14, 2021 10:15 am ET
by Not a very good villain if you ask me. of And such stupid minions.
Did you ever play
Conan the Barbarian;
chopped off your friend's head?
Haiku # 73575, November 14, 2021 10:11 am ET
by Oops! Sorry about little Caleb, Mrs. Davenport. of Sheepishly returning the machete to old Mr. Dixon's tool shed.
Not one mention of
Dr. Who and his tardis
on this whole damn site!
Haiku # 73574, November 14, 2021 10:05 am ET
by ... Just what the hell is a "police box" anyway?!
Back to the Sleestaks.
What if they owned sea monkeys!
What a team they'd make!
Haiku # 73573, November 14, 2021 10:02 am ET
by Bipedal reptiles and brine shrimp overlords! of Better leaders than current world government.
Do you think they'll eat
Thanksgiving dinner if I
put it in their tank?
Haiku # 73572, November 14, 2021 9:58 am ET
by Don't forget the potato salad! of And pumpkin pie.
Sea monkeys are whores.
Pimped out anonymously
by the Jacques Cousteau.
Haiku # 73571, November 14, 2021 9:56 am ET
by I have proof! Bank records! Cashed checks!
I've never seen a
sea monkey spank his monkey
even for money.
Haiku # 73570, November 14, 2021 8:13 am ET
by Magnifying glass obsessions. of Scientific observation, hypothesis, law, theory.
Did you ever wank
to sea monkey comic ads?
The queen's pretty hot.
Haiku # 73569, November 14, 2021 8:04 am ET
by Ain't she though! of
Sleestaks are sexy.
You know you've thought about it.
Bang some reptile strange.
Haiku # 73568, November 14, 2021 7:55 am ET
by Saturday morning couch stains.
You must remember!
You are NOT a sea monkey.
You don't belong there.
Haiku # 73567, November 14, 2021 7:49 am ET
by Stay away from that shrink ray!
I've never seen a
disappointed sea monkey.
They seem so happy.
Haiku # 73566, November 14, 2021 7:47 am ET
by In their little fish bowl kingdom.
YOU'RE the dinosaur
if you watched "Land of the Lost".
Roast your own penis.
Haiku # 73565, November 14, 2021 3:13 am ET
by Chef Mao Sugiyama of Tokyo
I love that one part.
Outside in the cold distance
a wildcat did growl.
Haiku # 73564, November 14, 2021 3:08 am ET
by Two riders were approaching.
Which do you like more,
Hey Joe or The Watchtower?
I'm thinking Hey Joe.
Haiku # 73563, November 14, 2021 3:01 am ET
by Decisions
True North all depends
on where the hell your standing.
Like standing in hell.

True Worth all depends
on how much money you have.
Ask a prostitute.
Haiku # 73562, November 14, 2021 2:51 am ET
by Johnny John-John
The disappointment
of mail order hookers
is kind of like "match"

Haiku # 73561, November 14, 2021 2:44 am ET
by Oh wait, it's the same!
have you ever lost
your bearings to that one who
just throws true north off?
Haiku # 73560, November 13, 2021 11:16 pm ET
by vhs
why is there always
that one asshole, troll or quirk
that hits the button?
Haiku # 73559, November 13, 2021 11:10 pm ET
by vhs
Caveman Thanksgiving
Everyone dressed up so nice
Roast dinosaur cock!
Haiku # 73558, November 13, 2021 10:51 pm ET
by Chaka of Land of the Lost
Caveman Thanksgiving
Everyone dressed up so nice
Roast dinosaur cock!
Haiku # 73557, November 13, 2021 10:50 pm ET
by Chaka of Land of the Lost
The disappointment
of mail order sea monkeys
is like Bad Haiku
Haiku # 73556, November 13, 2021 10:43 pm ET
by Noticer of details
The remote viewing
ended as an addiction,
seeing your true face.
Haiku # 73555, November 13, 2021 9:39 pm ET
by True face two-face of A world of whores and thieves.
Suicidal maniacs.
Ill advised tactics.
Haiku # 73554, November 13, 2021 9:34 pm ET
by and large, what do you hope to accomplish? of Is it worth it?
It's rather pointless,
evil without comedy,
but that is your game.
Haiku # 73553, November 13, 2021 9:29 pm ET
by the way, I know.
Your weather update
Raindrops falling on the rez
Same thing tomorrow
Haiku # 73552, November 13, 2021 8:54 pm ET
by I. Fed the hummingbirds
How much did it cost?
Murdering your first offspring?
It brought you such joy.
Haiku # 73551, November 13, 2021 7:09 pm ET
by This is truth.
this site's fatal flaws:
spam and impersonation
and yet, we're still here
Haiku # 73550, November 13, 2021 5:50 pm ET
by scotch
Well if you must know
That was Mexican coca
Cola,real sugar
Haiku # 73548, November 13, 2021 3:39 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of Dollar generalissimo!
The remote viewing
It started as a hobby
Haiku # 73547, November 13, 2021 3:11 pm ET
by I. Just saw yours of really, Darth? underoos?
This site run by spooks:
Funded by the Pentagon;
C.I.A. psy-op
Haiku # 73546, November 13, 2021 2:52 pm ET
by Trillions in Budget of Unaccounted For
Signs are everywhere.
Haiku millennium's here!
Has Janis returned?
Haiku # 73545, November 13, 2021 2:46 pm ET
by Second Coming of Janis
don't haiku so loud
daddy's got a hangover
just help me clean up
Haiku # 73544, November 13, 2021 1:24 pm ET
by scotch of post-partyum
Popcorn just sounds good
Yet like m n ms after
4 bites goes blander
Haiku # 73543, November 13, 2021 12:40 pm ET
by Vhs of Be kind please rewind
Netflix and butter
Watch Last Tango in Paris
No need for popcorn
Haiku # 73542, November 13, 2021 11:27 am ET
by Starkitten of sur la table
now uh, those damn things
conspiracies, can they just
get x filed, please please
Haiku # 73541, November 13, 2021 11:02 am ET
by vhs of no more illuminati
on a roll huh they
say, you need butter or some
other condiment?
Haiku # 73540, November 13, 2021 10:59 am ET
by vhs
But in people years
Badhaiku is ninety-five.
It should wear depends.
Haiku # 73539, November 13, 2021 9:42 am ET
by I'm on a roll!
Twenty-five silver,
fifty gold, and seventy
is platinum... then...

one hundred is rust!
Haiku # 73538, November 13, 2021 9:39 am ET
by budda boom, budda bing
i guess belarus
is trying to sell boner
pills to this website?
Haiku # 73536, November 13, 2021 8:52 am ET
by vhs
haiku correction
this was misattributed
the mischief was mine:

tags were once legal
and i brought down the site once
ah, the good old days
Haiku # 73534, November 13, 2021 2:44 am ET
by by scotch, not janis
a blast from the past
what the site used to look like
still had its braces

(check the location)
Haiku # 73533, November 13, 2021 2:29 am ET
by scotch of
twenty five oh what
anniversary is that?
ohh,the silver one!
Haiku # 73532, November 13, 2021 1:17 am ET
by silver vhs
the joy of posting
happy little haiku, oh
titanium white
Haiku # 73531, November 13, 2021 1:14 am ET
by vhs of bob ross and the afro
"The fridge sits empty
Because I am too lazy
To buy some groceries"

haiku number 1
the primordial poem.
your fridge still empty?
Haiku # 73530, November 12, 2021 10:23 pm ET
by scotch of long before online ordering
like an old burner:
"used to be you could shoot guns"
still, we've got free speech
Haiku # 73529, November 12, 2021 9:29 pm ET
by scotch of and no ads
< 50 Less Recent Haiku 50 More Recent Haiku >