Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 66 Days and 77464 Haiku later...

fat chick, short red dress
winking provocatively
i follow, zombie-like
Haiku # 7043, March 16, 2001 2:00 pm ET
by mondongo of in your mind
time for poop baseball.
I try not to run but get
caught in a squeeze play
Haiku # 7042, March 16, 2001 2:00 pm ET
by The Fourth Way of Seattle
read -READ!- what you don't
have the nerve to throw out! WHAT
no one wants to read!!
Haiku # 7041, March 16, 2001 1:59 pm ET
by boo
time for poop baseball.
I try not to run but get
caught in a squeeze play
Haiku # 7040, March 16, 2001 1:59 pm ET
by The Fourth Way of Seattle
too many, too much
and all worse than bad STUPID
pathinspicration!
Haiku # 7039, March 16, 2001 1:57 pm ET
by boo
no heat, my fingers
freeze around the shape of the
mouse that's on my desk
Haiku # 7038, March 16, 2001 1:57 pm ET
by hola of down the hall from thegrue
oh bad bad haiku
keep me warm in my office
it's cold, has no heat
Haiku # 7037, March 16, 2001 1:55 pm ET
by hola of down the hall from thegrue
fat chick screams, jumps out
window plummeting 4 feet.
...we're on the ground floor....
Haiku # 7036, March 16, 2001 1:51 pm ET
by the fourth way of seattle
when i hit refresh
and there is no new haiku
then i am lonely
Haiku # 7035, March 16, 2001 1:50 pm ET
by thegrue of down the hall from hola
my browser keeps run
ning minimized in systray
refresh, refresh now!
Haiku # 7034, March 16, 2001 1:48 pm ET
by hola of down the hall from thegrue
fat chick on weight scale
i ventriloquise to scale
"you are fat. get off."
Haiku # 7033, March 16, 2001 1:47 pm ET
by mondongo
it's not tuesday here
must be the y2k bug
making thegrue wrong
Haiku # 7032, March 16, 2001 1:46 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
cream. sugar. coffee.
indeed these are my life's loves.
tuesday's good, i say!
Haiku # 7031, March 16, 2001 1:42 pm ET
by thegrue of down the hall from hola
what's a syllable?
it says to use five of them.
dont laugh. i can't read.
Haiku # 7030, March 16, 2001 1:42 pm ET
by greenlight, (bernie kosar)
sweet cranberry grape
servings per container: 2
i drink both at once
Haiku # 7029, March 16, 2001 1:41 pm ET
by Dan Moskowitz of California
thou art not a mouse.
thou art not a mouse! no way!
thou art not a mouse.
Haiku # 7028, March 16, 2001 1:41 pm ET
by thegrue of down the hall from hola
mmm damn fine coffee
cream and sugar to ease pain
how does Tuesday look?
Haiku # 7027, March 16, 2001 1:40 pm ET
by hola of down the hall from thegrue
no. i'm mickey mouse.
why aren't you listening?
I'm really mickey!
Haiku # 7026, March 16, 2001 1:39 pm ET
by greenlight, city wide
Cold bloody hacksaw
Fits my hand with loving care
Limbs fill the basket
Haiku # 7025, March 16, 2001 1:37 pm ET
by Grandmaster D of CA
greenlight! homebrew! g!
welcome to today's playground.
come sing and frolic!
Haiku # 7024, March 16, 2001 1:31 pm ET
by thegrue of down the hall from hola
soon your smoke will rise
above cups of damn fine coffee.
when are you most free?
Haiku # 7023, March 16, 2001 1:29 pm ET
by thegrue of down the hall from hola
thegrue and hola:
first inductees of the bad
haiku hall of fame
Haiku # 7022, March 16, 2001 1:29 pm ET
by greenlight, across the city from thegrue and hola
I feel the need for
a much deserved cigarette
my lungs will rot soon
Haiku # 7021, March 16, 2001 1:28 pm ET
by hola of down the hall from thegrue
combine them, hola,
enjoy browser-based haiku:
blang! bame! blame! lang! blang!
Haiku # 7020, March 16, 2001 1:26 pm ET
by thegrue of down the hall from hola
if haiku were guns
misfire is more than likely
lame! lame! lame! lame! lame!
Haiku # 7019, March 16, 2001 1:24 pm ET
by hola of down the hall from thegrue
you forgot your name
and a syllable also
in that anon one
Haiku # 7018, March 16, 2001 1:24 pm ET
by The fourth way of seattle
if browsers were guns
mine would fire repeatedly.
bang! bang! bang! bang! bang!
Haiku # 7017, March 16, 2001 1:22 pm ET
by thegrue of down the hall from hola
Perhaps thegrue, you
should hit the refresh button
in browser toolbar
Haiku # 7016, March 16, 2001 1:21 pm ET
by hola of down the hall from thegrue
hola, t'is okay,
most days i can't remember
my own name, how sad..
Haiku # 7015, March 16, 2001 1:20 pm ET
by thegrue of down the hall from hola
I will take credit
for haiku 7013
forgot my name
Haiku # 7014, March 16, 2001 1:19 pm ET
by hola of down the hall from thegrue
damn missed that posting
wasn't for lack of trying
seventeen seconds
Haiku # 7013, March 16, 2001 1:18 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I despise Windows
98, and oh
The blue screen of death

Haiku # 7012, March 16, 2001 1:16 pm ET
by hola of down the hall from thegrue
hola, down the hall,
through thick walls, posting same time,
our haikus are gold!
Haiku # 7011, March 16, 2001 1:15 pm ET
by thegrue of down the hall from hola
grue: gimme a slap!
simultaneous postings--
coincidence? nah.
Haiku # 7010, March 16, 2001 1:12 pm ET
by Hola of down the hall from thegrue
down the hall from here
fellow clevelandite reboots
god loves microsoft
Haiku # 7009, March 16, 2001 1:10 pm ET
by thegrue of down the hall from hola
Screw this working stuff
just turn on the tournament!
it's march madness time
Haiku # 7008, March 16, 2001 1:05 pm ET
by The Fourth Way of down the hall from anthony michael
I just miscounted
so, apple-polly-loggies
it was haikuless
Haiku # 7007, March 16, 2001 1:02 pm ET
by Fyodor
Oh fellows oppressed
thank goodness we have all
this bad haiku
Haiku # 7006, March 16, 2001 1:01 pm ET
by Hola of down the hall from thegrue
numbers do not lie.
but then again, nor do i!
har har har. ho. hi.
Haiku # 7005, March 16, 2001 1:00 pm ET
by thegrue of down the hall from hola
that's simply insane
one plus three times four eighty five
equals five minus pi
Haiku # 7004, March 16, 2001 1:00 pm ET
by Fyodor
easily amused
fellow workers of the world,
cleveland salutes you!
Haiku # 7003, March 16, 2001 12:59 pm ET
by thegrue of down the hall from hola
two times four is
the magic number you should
put in the boxes
Haiku # 7002, March 16, 2001 12:59 pm ET
by Hola of down the hall from thegrue
justified hours:
one plus one plus one plus one
equals eight, i say!
Haiku # 7001, March 16, 2001 12:56 pm ET
by thegrue of down the hall from hola
but without napster,
what will metallica do?
no one else to sue!
Haiku # 7000, March 16, 2001 12:56 pm ET
by thegrue of down the hall from hola
why does daddy drink?
After thoery came practice
average genepool
Haiku # 6999, March 16, 2001 12:55 pm ET
by fyodor
did i work today?
justify our existence
filling timesheets sucks
Haiku # 6998, March 16, 2001 12:46 pm ET
by Hola of down the hall from thegrue
don't fear the reaper
we'll be able to fly, don't
fear the reaper, plotz

I count syllables
on my fingers instead of
being good worker

i so inspired
that i think i'll go home for
lunch and whack it off
Haiku # 6997, March 16, 2001 12:45 pm ET
by raging johnson of cube farm CTP2E
i have nobody
to get drunk with tomorrow
feel suicidal
Haiku # 6996, March 16, 2001 12:42 pm ET
by raging johnson of cube farm CTP2E
hi i speak engrish
that is why my favorite
day is election
Haiku # 6995, March 16, 2001 12:42 pm ET
by raging johnson of cube farm CTP2E
must do some good work,
for on the cold city streets,
there's no bad haiku.
Haiku # 6994, March 16, 2001 12:36 pm ET
by thegrue of down the hall from hola
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