We apologize
Pussy is sold out today
Frozen Furburger?
by Gatita Estrella of Igloo
I googled "pussy".
But the search could not find it.
It was "offensive".
by Pepe LePew of Always chasing it.
Filthy old pervert.
Leave that hermit crab alone.
Go have an ice cream.
by Just a suggestion.
Second line of the previous haiku contains a silent meow
by Pussy of Grab-able
Breaking Haiku News
Mick Jagger gets a kitten
Pope orders pay cuts
by Noticer of Details of Your Haiku News Source
Shank of the evening
Putting the finishing touch
on this Bad Haiku
by A. Booger of Addressed to you
Olde March Limerick
There was a lad from Haiku
He smelled just like you
by March Wind of Near Cheese (apparently)
Babies will eat you
They can never be trusted
Cook you like bacon
by Margaret Thatcher
Legend of Limpdick
A popsicle stick and tape
made it possible
by Wank E. Ingenuity of Patent Pending
But you cannot change
that which is nonexistant.
Feel the breeze flow through.
by Cool, dry balls
The invitation
It's always extended, Ma'am
The full 12 inches
by Every guy in here's penis of Headed for the door
The ever changing
Never seems to change at all
Like your underwear
by Noticer of Details
Thought it were Cheryl
But it were Farah Fawcett
On that old poster
by ETERNAL of TMPORARY
Russian recipes
How to cook rats or people
Feed your family
Eat your family
Grandma was just delicious
Fuck off Babooshka
by Vladimir Pooten
I'm Cheryl's left tit
In that 70s poster
Nice to meet you (wet)
by Mammary Whammery of DISCO
Strangled Cock Found Dead
Alien Hand Syndrome Blamed
Cops Finger Suspect
by Farm Report of Manure Bank/ Cannabis Emporium
An eternal stream
You've heard the men from Old Minsk
have the biggest dinsks
by Foot Long of Belarus
There is this one glitch
Our bottled water is piss
May contain some pulp
by Jugs Malone of Long Haul Trucker
Return, O Big Wave
Tsunami of Syllables
Where are you drowned rats?
by Lone Wolf of Under Old Willow
The question remains
Has Bad Haiku jumped the shark?
You all sure clammed up
by Geoduck of Sticking out
This is what drew Mork
to visit our crude planet
(And Laverne's wet snatch)
by Your TV Guide of Couch
Look under the fez
You won't see small potatoes
Happy Days are here
by Tom B. of Tooting my own horn (literally)
Tom Bosley’s Fez
covering his erect shaft
Extra Large Fez
by Tom Bosley’s Boastful Ghoul of Limbo
Patrick Swayzee. Ghost.
Massaging pottery clay
but this time it’s cheese
by Stinky Limberger of Fromunda the bridge
New TV Dinner
In the frozen foods section
Hungry Cannibal
by Clik Clak fresh balls of Oysters Rockefeller
Cassowary Bird
In a Cassowary World
Cassowary Girl
by Cassowary Bird of You Fucking want one?
Clownworld needs its verse
Hence, our stunning haiku verse
Like a rotting corpse
by Happy Clown Face of Doom
Look at this poster
Stop struggling to get it up
It’s Farrah Fawcett
by Stud Finder of Hole in the wall
Your haiku are shit
But that's the whole point of it
Tom Bosley's penis
by Sarah Jessica Parker
The cherry blossoms are here again
but I'm dying of Covid
Isn't life shit?
by Harry Hashimoto of Kyoto
Where is sky
I'm searching every day
On the eath
by Otteri Selva Kumar of # Haiku Art # (Daily Haiku Magazine) Otteri, Chennai
Please do NOT "stay safe".
Rather remain dangerous.
Infectious and free.
by Alien Messiah
The China virus:
it's Marxism in the West
For herd-animals.
by Stay Safe of Stay Healthy
I won't make you wait.
Some people call it Kung Flu.
'Cause it packs a punch.
by Biowarfare Division of PPRC of Winnie The Pooh's Home.
Someone light a match
Seventeen syllable fart
Three lines of skidmarks
by Seventeen syllable of Stain
Some people call it
Wait....wait for it.....wait for it
THE CHINA VIRUS
by Asshole of Florida Orange
Postcard from a fart
Wish you were here! See ya soon!
Delayed in Transit
by Lower Intestine (Journey of Consitpation) of Defecation Station
Bad Haiku Poet
Witness Protection Program
You know who you are
by Know you of By the smell
What fuckery's this.
Free at the VD clinic.
Christ, this ain't Russia!
by Effing commie capitalists!
You don't want to suck.
But you want the ten dollars.
Make up your damn mind!
by Goddamn dirty whores.
Container garden
Under your balls....succulents!
No one wants to suck
by Terry Mulcher of Cielo Drive
A flower tattoo
encroaching on your pubis
improves not the smell.
by
drink your big black cow
and get outta here, you know
bands named for dildoes
by vhs of steely dan, man
You're a dren, Potsie
Root beer float with two straws
Fresh pack of rubbers
by Things are looking up of Arnold's Restaurant
You're a dren, Potsie
Root beer float with two straws
Fresh pack of rubbers
by Things are looking up of Arnold's Restaurant
Refill all floats, Don.
How much vile doo i have!
"Shit Happens" on tie-dye.
Coffee ice cream float.
Made with original Coke.
The one with cocaine.
It will wake you up.
Peruvian dessert freeze.
Häagen-Dazs brain blast!
by Refill your Free Will. of It's free on Mondays!
we will all float on
how much evil do i have
what happens when i die?
by vhs
What’s your favourite food?
I guarantee we have it!!
Buy End Times Buckets!!
by Jim Bakker of Awaiting your payment
Stop wasting money
Buying that shitty mall weed
Buy End Times Buckets!!
by Your Armageddon Buffet of And Portable Latrine
My God, pot's legal.
And you all still can't behave.
What a sad sad state.
I'd pay good money
to get each one of you high
as Cheech and Chong.
Maybe then you'd smile.
Sad little internet trolls.
Leave your mom's basement!
by And I don't mean Arkansas state. I mean your existence! of Move to Oregon, it's all legal there!
