The presidential debates would be better handled as a booger picking contest based on size, color, texture, and how many nostril hairs are in there.
Best three out of five wins. Loser buys the other one a beer.
Haiku #68190, by the way, I'd really like it if one of you buys me a case of beer. Extra dark. German prefered. September 30, 2020 6:32 am ET
Come on out, you vigalante poets!
"You complete me," The Joker says to Batman.
"What would I do without you?!"
Haiku #68189, by Snuffleupagus goes to an Asian "massage" parlor. of They cook and eat him. Typical. September 29, 2020 10:23 pm ET
We get the debate
That we deserve: two old clowns
Out-shout each other.
Haiku #68188, by Babylon is Falling but Slowly September 29, 2020 10:16 pm ET
Where is ev'ryone?
Have you all died of covid?
Life will be empty.
If corona kills about 1 in 1000 people, or even 1 in 500... or 1 in 100.... or 1 in 50. Is that such a bad thing?!?!
Haiku #68181, by Poets Against Humanity! September 28, 2020 10:44 pm ET
Consider the graph...
... I can't attach my butt-pic?
What a lame website!
Come on, fix this site!
You know you want to see it.
I will show it all!
Ev'ry dangly bit!
Testes and dingleberries.
They look 'bout the same.
at the point of origin.
Concave up or down?
Haiku #68180, by Explicit Different Calculust. September 28, 2020 10:38 pm ET
I want a poem
that conjures up Satan
five thousand feet tall
pooping fire balls
belching sulfuric acid
and does my bidding
Haiku #68179, by Christ, I said Satan, not Elmo! September 28, 2020 9:06 pm ET
Walk outside naked.
Smeared with your rancid feces.
Then you'll find freedom.
Well, maybe not in the US, but in other poor countries, they won't touch the crazy people... bad luck and curses and diseases. Being crazy and poor is pure freedom. I've seen it! No corona lock down for those lucky fools.
Haiku #68178, by The virus is coming, the virus is coming! of ... lucky virus September 28, 2020 7:56 pm ET
I have to scream now
but i can't leave the damn house
Haiku #68177, by scotch of united states of fuck we're on fire September 28, 2020 7:36 pm ET
Yom Kippur's about
repentence and atonement.
But I don't need that.
That's 'cuz I'm perfect.
I have never, ever sinned.
No, never, not once!
I thought I did once,
but that was God playing tricks.
Well, at least I tried.
Haiku #68176, by There is no try... on the toilet. of Only poo, or poo not. September 28, 2020 6:55 pm ET
Happy Yom Kippur,
Whatever the hell THAT means
To Gentiles. Oy veh.
Haiku #68175, by The Other Eleven Tribes of the Diaspora September 28, 2020 6:39 pm ET
In the ass, okay.
Just not in the vagina.
That can cause problems!
Take your vitamins.
Brush your teeth three times a day.
No Pop Rocks in there.
You can trust me, ma'am.
Dr. Whorendous knows best.
That's five hundred dollars.
Haiku #68174, by Please pay at the front desk. of Graceland, Nashville, TN September 28, 2020 5:27 pm ET