BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
23 Years
233 Days
67685 Haikus
if he's put back in
i'll suffer with the planet
and write bad haiku
Haiku #67058, by scotch of you don't know me
March 11, 2020 1:22 pm ET

real hate crimes go up
wherever trump holds rallies
and bernie scares you?
Haiku #67057, by scotch of untied states of projection
March 11, 2020 1:19 pm ET

When Bernies threaten
To burn cities down and kill
Is that common talk?

Americans are now wise
To leftist do as I say
Jive turkey talk

Four more years baby
You will cry hellish loud
And get violent.
Haiku #67056, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
March 11, 2020 12:57 pm ET

it's a common phrase
"bring a gun to a knife fight"
trump said "take her out"
Haiku #67055, by scotch of untied states of people playing dumb, or actually being dumb, while fascism takes hold
March 11, 2020 12:46 pm ET

Communist are worse
Than National Socialists
Then killed millions more
Haiku #67054, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
March 11, 2020 12:43 pm ET

When Obama said
Bring a gun to a knife fight
Did you cry?

Good for goose gander.
The Democrat jive turkeys
Need to use a mirror
Haiku #67053, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
March 11, 2020 12:35 pm ET

Get rid of Chicom's!
Disengage from biz with them!
Dangerous not to!
Haiku #67052, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
March 11, 2020 12:32 pm ET

when giuliani
said trump could shoot james comey
did you give one shit?
Haiku #67051, by scotch of untied states of hypocrisy
March 11, 2020 12:31 pm ET

when the donald said
maybe gun nuts could stop Hil
were you outraged? no
Haiku #67050, by scotch of untied states of hypocrisy
March 11, 2020 12:29 pm ET

The Wuhan Virus
Communist party fook up!
How you like Mao now?
Haiku #67049, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
March 11, 2020 12:17 pm ET

Chucky Shumer-dolt
Threats to the supreme's yak yak!
Chucky got red flagged

Take Chucky's guns
He don't have none? wat the hell?
His goon squad does though

Typical jive @$$
Communist Democrat dolt
Use a mirror fool
Haiku #67048, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
March 11, 2020 12:14 pm ET

rubber hits the road
rubber leaf blight hits rubber
and then we are done
Haiku #67047, by scotch of forget coronavirus
March 10, 2020 12:38 pm ET

Triangle I am
But four sided is my mind
Shapely eccentric
Haiku #67046, by Pythagoras-on-Acidas of Lesbian Island
March 10, 2020 8:40 am ET

That's IT! You are right.
GOP are not right-wing...
Mostly globalists.
Haiku #67045, by Early Hint of Spring
March 10, 2020 8:22 am ET

if they're not right wing,
neither is the GOP.
fox is their channel
Haiku #67044, by scotch of according to the FBI
March 9, 2020 3:51 pm ET

Fox is not Right-wing
Fox is corporate money;
Lip gloss. No values.
Haiku #67043, by Hen House of Fox
March 9, 2020 3:46 pm ET

picture their love-child:
roger ailes and dick nixon.
it's sean hannity
Haiku #67042, by scotch of
March 9, 2020 1:28 pm ET

as it was designed,
"Fox News" works for the party.
Haiku #67041, by scotch of
March 9, 2020 1:25 pm ET

He entertained us.
Why would I care if he's gay?
He entered anus.
Haiku #67040, by of of of robot robot robot
March 9, 2020 1:38 am ET

They don't look like shit...
Those chicks are true goddesses.
(They're just a bit used).
Haiku #67039, by Subversion of the Pornocracy
March 8, 2020 10:02 pm ET

You know what sucks ass?
Getting past a relationship with a girl who you were absolutely crazy about and then for bad reasons you both had to end it... but then after some time you try to jack off to porn, but can't because those chicks just look like shit.
That truly sucks ass!

Complain if you want.
A long seven syllables.
Ask me if I care!
Haiku #67038, by of of of
March 8, 2020 8:08 am ET

oh hi ash, how's your
sex life? nice doggie! lisa!!!
you are tearing me apart!!!!
Haiku #67037, by Tommy VHSeau
March 7, 2020 1:56 pm ET

here's a thing they say:
good is enemy of great.
bad yells "fight", takes bets
Haiku #67036, by scotch of modern politics explained
March 7, 2020 2:05 am ET

Only one true god
Macho Man Randy Savage
Cream always rises
Haiku #67035, by Killdozer of CO
March 6, 2020 1:47 pm ET

def not a haiku
perhaps put it to music
could be viral hit
Haiku #67034, by scotch of play free bird
March 6, 2020 1:06 pm ET

i'm not scared of bugs
if the whiskey don't kill me
i'll live 'till i die
Haiku #67033, by scotch of immortality, at least so far
March 6, 2020 12:17 pm ET

not a haiku, but hey, topical as all bejesus :

Late in the year of 2019
a novel virus hit the scene
and though the birth was a little bit hazy
just a few months later the world's gone batshit crazy

we've been waiting, just waiting, it seems
for apocalyptic times

see the people panic buying
watch them freak at their chance of dying
surely the media isn't lying

as news of the spread goes viral

our crisis is no longer existential
it's here and now and pestilential
watch anxiety go exponential

as the stories start to spiral

like coronavirus r.n.a.

it seems that stuff is here to stay
gonna all get some so they say
before the whole thing goes away

that's a dreadful worry

but if you're not old
or sick
or have other complications

you probably won't die
at least from it
in any hurry

but sorry to confirm, something will eventually kill you regardless
Haiku #67032, by ash
March 6, 2020 4:36 am ET

A great way to explore my
Anal cavity
Haiku #67031, by Boners in butts of 2020
March 6, 2020 3:56 am ET

drunk decisions are
Leading to pregnancies but
Just gunna send it
Haiku #67030, by Burrito boy of Mars
March 6, 2020 3:53 am ET

when there is no line
There is something that distracts
And that wins us all
Haiku #67029, by tittys donâ of San Diego
March 6, 2020 3:52 am ET

Well... somebody's got
Some extremely serious
Mommy-love issues
Haiku #67028, by Backing Away Slowly of Bad Haiku
March 5, 2020 11:08 pm ET

I need Hillary
Mothering, smothering me
Globally sweaty
Haiku #67027, by Traveler of AR
March 5, 2020 9:27 pm ET

I'd fuck Hillary.
Just to say been there done that.
Banged a first lady.

And if she were Pres.,
then I'd fuck Slick Willy too.
Maybe a three-way!
Haiku #67026, by of of of
March 5, 2020 8:08 pm ET

Stuck on Hillary?
I think you are hot for her
You must like pantsuits
Haiku #67025, by Jesus is lard
March 5, 2020 6:03 pm ET

Presidents task force:
Dudes who don't believe science
We are going to die
Haiku #67024, by Jesus is lard
March 5, 2020 5:59 pm ET

Money was laundered
Truth got snorted up noses
Witnesses silenced
Haiku #67023, by Hillbillary of Scotch Tape
March 5, 2020 2:37 pm ET

lesser minds can't see
her innocence proves her guilt
this blog explains it
Haiku #67022, by scotch of no thanks!
March 5, 2020 11:19 am ET

she is so guilty!
although never convicted.
proof of the deep state
Haiku #67021, by scotch of the rabbit hole
March 5, 2020 11:14 am ET

Those Arkansas tricks:
I went down the rabbit hole...
Found lots of bodies.
Haiku #67020, by Hillbillary's Team of Fake Lawyers
March 5, 2020 10:58 am ET

hil and obama
still hatching their evil schemes
in their secret lairs
Haiku #67019, by scotch of can anyone stop them? Oh, look, up in the sky!
March 5, 2020 1:53 am ET

Rose Law Whitewater
Mena Cocaine Gunrunning
(Arkancided All)
Haiku #67018, by Hillbillary of Global Village
March 4, 2020 8:23 pm ET

for all shopping needs:
badhaiku dot com website
if your needs are few
Haiku #67017, by scotch of minimalism
March 4, 2020 12:34 pm ET

We are sell fine watch
Huanjin trading company
There. I made haiku.
Haiku #67016, by Greatest Salesman of Central Party Command Structure
March 4, 2020 7:40 am ET

go forex elsewhere
this site has no currency
bye hungary ghost
Haiku #67015, by scotch of wind in the trees
March 4, 2020 1:42 am ET Listája szabályozott forex brókerek-alkuszok.
Haiku #67014, by Brokersjix of Brokers
March 3, 2020 9:29 pm ET

There's this guy I know
Trying to baptize a cat
Not really sure why
Haiku #67013, by Anomalous Poet
March 3, 2020 7:48 pm ET

science fiction i
suppose, but discord sez hot
dogs are on fridays
Haiku #67012, by Anonymous Poet
March 3, 2020 2:37 pm ET

6K years ago
god was making fake fossils
why? to test our faith
Haiku #67011, by scotch of i fail, see you in hell
March 3, 2020 12:07 pm ET

shrugs...cats in hats, a
tendency to turn ourselves
to idols of chance
Haiku #67010, by vhs
March 3, 2020 9:59 am ET

i believe in you
and i believe in your poo
god, now wash your hands
Haiku #67009, by scotch of scatotheology
March 2, 2020 9:21 pm ET