BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
22 Years
253 Days
and
65396 Haikus
later...
God laughed the loudest
Then he pulled out his big schlong
And caused an earthquake
Haiku #64778, by smite Runner
May 13, 2019 5:56 am ET

Penis weigh station
Embarrassing to be puny
Everyone laughing
Haiku #64777, by tiny pecker of hiding
May 13, 2019 5:54 am ET

Two bitcoin blowjob
A postcard from that mean bird
Cassowary Cum
Haiku #64776, by Lavatory Laureate of bird watching
May 13, 2019 3:07 am ET

Semen cannonball
Where's my morning after pill
You Neaderthal?
Haiku #64775, by I can see clearly now of The spooge is gone
May 13, 2019 2:19 am ET

Aboursiones? Depends how they're cooked!

We went to the abortion clinic just the other day.
And we were really hungry so we had to say...
Feed us. Feed us. Feed us.
Hey, what it is we don't care.
Feed us a fetus, feed us a fetus.
I'll take mine medium rare!
--Bo Burnham

This actor's guild/union, our payment for performing in this play -- coffee, beer, and a few orgasms. Fleeting currency universal BitCoin and the more depraved and dilapidated it all becomes, the more value it has and there is no reason for it all.

Do not cum in me.
I'll give birth to Donald Trump.
Dayglo afterbirth.

There is NO hope for the future and, while abortion is immoral and wrong and we should NOT deprive those little cocksuckers of their chance at life/suffering and misery, abortion is preemptive euthanasia. The youth in Asia support euthanasia. Flush them all. Deprive the Holy Audience of their Comical Play. It's the only true rebellion. Take up your full auto weapons and have a shopping mall hunting party. Or if you'd rather...

Ingest mutagens.
Give God His entertainment.
Two-headed lead role.

Dried pussy mucus.
Also known as cunt boogers.
Roll it 'tween your toes.
Haiku #64774, by I selected street lights and buses. of How exciting!
May 13, 2019 12:26 am ET

eternity
fetish
entropy
dilemma
mystical
harvest
Haiku #64773, by cyborg
May 12, 2019 11:47 pm ET

haunting
habit
mutation
hesitation
siren
baptism
Haiku #64772, by cyborg
May 12, 2019 11:46 pm ET

I do not like the Lexus bow tie grill,
It looks like it should be on a locomotive,
That travels through cattle country.
Haiku #64771, by Anonymous Poet
May 12, 2019 9:17 pm ET

Country Club Luncheon
Looks like Prime Rib but it's cunt
Cuntfart Cuntfart Cunt
Haiku #64770, by Caddy of Shack
May 12, 2019 7:47 pm ET

Every damn morning
The maniacal laughter
Bacon Sizzling
Haiku #64769, by Rise and Shine
May 12, 2019 3:02 pm ET

No one was looking
So Dad unzipped his blue jeans
And mounted the sow
Haiku #64768, by Noticer of Details of Barnyard
May 12, 2019 9:34 am ET

Hey Figpucker, you're
a freethinker. What about
abortion . . . your thoughts?
Haiku #64767, by Light to Rife of 3rd Trimester
May 11, 2019 11:25 pm ET

Sparrow in the Sky
Such beauty all around Me
Wait! What bit my Face?
Haiku #64766, by Ilsa Linsa of Hamburg, Germany
May 11, 2019 11:00 pm ET

Meghan Markle's cunt
From which a child emerged
Is likely Harry
Haiku #64765, by Double entendre
May 11, 2019 7:03 pm ET

Supposedly she's
A lizard person - Dave Icke
She'll gobble your fist
Haiku #64764, by Her Royal Majesty's Distant Cousin
May 11, 2019 6:18 pm ET

Rolling up my sleeves
Fisting Queen Elizabeth
Her husband is next
Haiku #64763, by Royal Stiffy
May 11, 2019 3:22 pm ET

Meghan Markle's cunt
Once thought recreational
Now has a purpose
Haiku #64762, by The Love Song of J Alfred Prufrock
May 11, 2019 2:52 pm ET

I knew my haiku
Would cue you to spew anew
Untrue points of view
Haiku #64761, by Your sacred spew of Figpuckery
May 11, 2019 6:05 am ET

You ll be fucking them
Wondering if theyre human
Just like you do now
Haiku #64760, by Some things of Never Change
May 11, 2019 3:55 am ET

You
Haiku #64759, by Some things of Never Change
May 11, 2019 3:54 am ET

The Twenty-Fifties:
They were something SPINGLOMPER
Space commies. Bots.
Haiku #64758, by Anonymous Poet
May 11, 2019 3:06 am ET

Never skips a beat
Hairstyles and fashions may change
Incest stays the same
Haiku #64757, by Noticer of Details of Cumtrails of Yesteryear
May 11, 2019 2:14 am ET

The Nineteen-Fourties:
They were something NUCLEAR
The Holocaust. Nukes.
Haiku #64756, by Anonymous Poet
May 11, 2019 1:44 am ET

The Nineteen-Fifties:
They were something RADICAL.
Family values. God.
Haiku #64755, by Anonymous Poet
May 10, 2019 11:09 pm ET

After Darkness Falls
Find them sucking dimpled balls
Argyle cum wad blown
Haiku #64754, by Caddy of Shack
May 10, 2019 10:13 pm ET

Professional golfers,
What a boring bland group,
Of guys they are.
Haiku #64753, by Anonymous Poet
May 10, 2019 9:25 pm ET

Start the day off right
Face down in my hot pussy
Good Morning Birdsong
Haiku #64752, by Cassowary Bird
May 10, 2019 8:40 am ET

Satan is God's ape.
The Lord keeps him on His leash.
Ask Martin Luther...
Haiku #64751, by Frederick the Elector of Saxony
May 10, 2019 8:05 am ET

I'm at the end zone
Scoping out some tight end meat
Wearing pantyhose
Haiku #64750, by Joe Namath of Sexy
May 10, 2019 7:58 am ET

Thrilling to behold
A man doing a handstand
With his erect dink
Haiku #64749, by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
May 10, 2019 6:17 am ET

Modern Poetry
Generated by robot
Robot named Satan
Haiku #64748, by Cassowary bird of Bird bath
May 10, 2019 3:16 am ET

His view was bovine
No wonder he looked at porn
And farm magazines
Haiku #64747, by Rural Guido of No toucha da mushrooms
May 10, 2019 3:11 am ET

Sound carried for miles
The Booming Climax of God
Fucking us over
Haiku #64746, by smite Runner
May 10, 2019 2:04 am ET

They never washed up
Enjoyed their mutual stench
Spotlight on Coitus
Haiku #64745, by colitis
May 10, 2019 2:02 am ET

Say what you want
Just keep moving your big mouth
On my clitoris
Haiku #64744, by puffy of Mmm Mmm Good
May 10, 2019 12:39 am ET

Pubic Hair Harvest
A bumper crop this season
Pulled under moonlight
Haiku #64743, by Anonymous Poet
May 10, 2019 12:33 am ET

Some parishioners
Had complained about the host
Wafers smelled like carp
Haiku #64742, by Noticer of Details of First pew
May 9, 2019 9:36 pm ET

Church let out early
Sister Margaret O'Mackerel
Had a smelly cunt
Haiku #64741, by Father Paul Pullingpud of Jerking off while I write this in the confessional
May 9, 2019 9:33 pm ET

What a great idea
Lord God Almighty and Son
New TV sitcom
Haiku #64740, by Like Sanford and Son of But Souls instead of junk
May 9, 2019 9:30 pm ET

Need to let Darth know
that CHRIST is his Lord and God
and will judge his ass.
Haiku #64739, by good luck of good night
May 9, 2019 8:42 pm ET

Cassowary.
Haiku #64738, by Anonymous Poet
May 9, 2019 8:10 pm ET

He closed the barn door
Felt around in the darkness
Found the warm sow's cunt
Haiku #64737, by Rural Guido of No toucha da mushrooms
May 9, 2019 7:46 pm ET

Cassowary.
Haiku #64736, by Anonymous Poet
May 9, 2019 5:09 pm ET

Cassowary.
Haiku #64735, by Anonymous Poet
May 9, 2019 5:09 pm ET

Cassowary.
Haiku #64734, by Anonymous Poet
May 9, 2019 5:09 pm ET

Cassowary.
Haiku #64733, by Anonymous Poet
May 9, 2019 5:09 pm ET

Cassowary.
Haiku #64732, by Anonymous Poet
May 9, 2019 5:09 pm ET

Cassowary.
Haiku #64731, by Anonymous Poet
May 9, 2019 5:08 pm ET

Cassowary.
Haiku #64730, by Anonymous Poet
May 9, 2019 5:08 pm ET

Cassowary.
Haiku #64729, by Anonymous Poet
May 9, 2019 5:07 pm ET