Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 40 Days and 77431 Haiku later...

The grey area
Betwixt my balls and asshole
I call it my taint
Haiku # 64376, April 26, 2019 4:41 pm ET
by Rural Guido of No toucha da mushrooms
The three little pigs
Shaking Quaking No Faking
Bacon Orgasm
Haiku # 64375, April 26, 2019 1:35 pm ET
by Garth Swinediddler of Sty
Christ once asked a man:
"How many of you are there
in there ?" (Pig demons)
Haiku # 64374, April 26, 2019 1:05 pm ET
by Exorcize and Keep Fit
God's a homophobe
Which doesn't make any sense
Cuz I think he's gay
Haiku # 64373, April 26, 2019 12:24 pm ET
by Horse of A different color
Yelling in GodsCunt
Secondhand didgeridoo
Tones only dogs hear
Haiku # 64372, April 26, 2019 11:48 am ET
by Down under
Yelling in God
Haiku # 64371, April 26, 2019 11:48 am ET
by Down under
Pork Figpucker chops
And applesauce!! Applesauce!!
My favorite rerun
Haiku # 64370, April 26, 2019 11:42 am ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
One hundred percent
USDA inspected
Pork Figpucker loin
Haiku # 64369, April 26, 2019 11:39 am ET
by Sam the Butcher of Brady Bunch
Why I buy brown sheets
Sometimes my bowel movements
Wake up before me
Haiku # 64368, April 26, 2019 11:35 am ET
by You snooze you lose
Knocked on your front door
No answer. You were sleeping.
Left package in rear
Haiku # 64367, April 26, 2019 11:31 am ET
by Why I sleep on my back
Emasculated
Took the thing between your legs
Mounted it on wall
Haiku # 64366, April 26, 2019 11:23 am ET
by Literally
Darth, maybe you need
One of those gut refill gigs
they call "shit transplant" (?)
Haiku # 64365, April 26, 2019 10:51 am ET
by Darthian Scarcity of Inspiration
Its not the end its the begging. Because there's always ANU truth in the beginning.
Haiku # 64364, April 26, 2019 10:19 am ET
by New Truth Rising of Hope
I just got neutered
Now that I don't have a dick
Can we date again?
Haiku # 64363, April 26, 2019 9:40 am ET
by Get out of My ass
I yelled in God's cunt.
The echo rang with a boom.
So much wasted time.

Empty and hollow.
And far too loose to enjoy.
Like an old hooker.

Friendly but pointless.
The deeper you look, the more
depressed you become.

Stay away from God.
It's the best thing you can do.
Play sudoku; die.
Haiku # 64362, April 26, 2019 7:23 am ET
by The End
That's why UPS
delivery workers wear
those ugly brown pants.
Haiku # 64361, April 26, 2019 7:14 am ET
by Didn't you know?
Cassowary Bird
Attacked our UPS man
Made him shit his pants
Haiku # 64360, April 26, 2019 2:52 am ET
by Nice
Grocery store
Examining cucumbers
Sampling a pickle
Haiku # 64359, April 26, 2019 2:50 am ET
by Nice
Climbing to the top
The peak of success. What's next?
Shit on everyone!
Haiku # 64358, April 25, 2019 11:54 pm ET
by Ava L'anche
Thanks for asking, friend
Now and then..I never know
Guess it's a craps shoot
Haiku # 64357, April 25, 2019 10:54 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
So you're saying that
gold coins DON'T spill out when you
bend over; that's strange.
Haiku # 64356, April 25, 2019 10:48 pm ET
by You should see a doctor.
Passersby take note
Didn't he outrun the train?
Where is his bucket?
Haiku # 64355, April 25, 2019 10:39 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Tranquil evening stroll
All of nature is chirping
And beating their meat
Haiku # 64354, April 25, 2019 10:37 pm ET
by Noticer of Details
Two sips of moonshine
Put some lead in your pencil
Spring Tonic is in!
Haiku # 64353, April 25, 2019 7:58 pm ET
by All seeing eye of Ike Godzey of Store
dead fetus
unfilled ovaries dead cells
just a spam dump useless life no pump to make a bump
Haiku # 64352, April 25, 2019 7:37 pm ET
by Empty Balls of Empty Bellies
Outrunning the train
Jerking off in a bucket
Hung around my neck
Haiku # 64351, April 25, 2019 6:56 pm ET
by WTF
Time for discussions
Tales of brave cassowaries
Their heroic deeds
Haiku # 64350, April 25, 2019 6:52 pm ET
by Cassowary Bird!!!
Hands moving so fast
Bring the scent up to my nose
Flatulence! Nectar!
Haiku # 64349, April 25, 2019 6:50 pm ET
by Mindfully Yours
Can you imagine
If every time I bent over
Gold coins would spill out
Haiku # 64348, April 25, 2019 6:46 pm ET
by I
So what animal
are we allowed to discuss
and/or make fun of?

How about humans!
Looks like monkeys, tastes like pork.
And bad at haiku.
Haiku # 64347, April 25, 2019 6:21 pm ET
by
Perfume of Spring wind
Kimono drying on line
I stand here naked
Haiku # 64346, April 25, 2019 6:10 pm ET
by Kyoto Moon
Wind howling,"Eat me"
Cassowaries line dancing
Evil is afoot
Haiku # 64345, April 25, 2019 5:24 pm ET
by Noticer of Details
Hospitality
Unexpected guests welcome
For you, I spread legs
Haiku # 64344, April 25, 2019 5:19 pm ET
by Open
Around the table
Pass the gravy. Pass the salt
I love eating cock!
Haiku # 64343, April 25, 2019 5:15 pm ET
by Bottomless Jolie-Pitt
Proboscis monkeys!
Like there's a cock their face.
The ladies love it!
Haiku # 64342, April 25, 2019 5:04 pm ET
by Cock-nosed Billy.
Kim Jong's cum is good
But Donald Trump would agree
Putin's is better
Haiku # 64341, April 25, 2019 4:59 pm ET
by Probability of Impeachment
Ghee Whiz, processed food.
Blessed by a Hindu priestess.
By pissing in it.
Haiku # 64340, April 25, 2019 4:46 pm ET
by Indians are so weird.
Please cease and desist
With the thing about the damn
Cassowary bird.
Haiku # 64339, April 25, 2019 4:32 pm ET
by Edsel Dodo
Doc says you have worms
Take this pill and you
Haiku # 64338, April 25, 2019 4:11 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Jasmine rice, old cheese
The belly dancer jiggles
Her cunt in your face
Haiku # 64337, April 25, 2019 3:56 pm ET
by A call for smelling salts
Customer Service
We did not like the ark ride
Cassowary bird
Haiku # 64336, April 25, 2019 3:52 pm ET
by God is Great
Golden horizon
I piss out of car window
The future is now
Haiku # 64335, April 25, 2019 3:50 pm ET
by Fugitive
Much funny laughters
Big dildo assembly line
Take selfie with it
Haiku # 64334, April 25, 2019 3:44 pm ET
by Rubberdinx of China
Cassowary Bird
We are flightless bird mofos
You must obey us!
Haiku # 64333, April 25, 2019 3:41 pm ET
by Cassowary bird
Don't waste your eyesight
Look over this way at me
Look at my big eye
Haiku # 64332, April 25, 2019 2:10 pm ET
by Cyclops
the joestars are suck
they make me want to throw up
muda muda wry
Haiku # 64331, April 25, 2019 12:30 pm ET
by DIO of rly dark mansion
Teenage Figpucker
Masturbation in Session
"Got math homework, mom"
Haiku # 64330, April 25, 2019 12:17 pm ET
by All seeing eye of Horn Dog
I think it should be
Something much more slippery
Perhaps you try ghee?
Haiku # 64329, April 25, 2019 11:58 am ET
by Dr. Seuss of Stadium of Epic Masturbation
Butter or jelly
Which should I smear on my dick
When I masturbate?
Haiku # 64328, April 25, 2019 11:44 am ET
by Get out of My house
How would you like to
suck out the cordial cherries.
They'll give you cancer.
Haiku # 64327, April 25, 2019 6:52 am ET
by Lord Figpucker
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