Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 40 Days and 77431 Haiku later...

Grocery store
Examining cucumbers
Sampling a pickle
Haiku # 64359, April 26, 2019 2:50 am ET
by Nice
Climbing to the top
The peak of success. What's next?
Shit on everyone!
Haiku # 64358, April 25, 2019 11:54 pm ET
by Ava L'anche
Thanks for asking, friend
Now and then..I never know
Guess it's a craps shoot
Haiku # 64357, April 25, 2019 10:54 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
So you're saying that
gold coins DON'T spill out when you
bend over; that's strange.
Haiku # 64356, April 25, 2019 10:48 pm ET
by You should see a doctor.
Passersby take note
Didn't he outrun the train?
Where is his bucket?
Haiku # 64355, April 25, 2019 10:39 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Tranquil evening stroll
All of nature is chirping
And beating their meat
Haiku # 64354, April 25, 2019 10:37 pm ET
by Noticer of Details
Two sips of moonshine
Put some lead in your pencil
Spring Tonic is in!
Haiku # 64353, April 25, 2019 7:58 pm ET
by All seeing eye of Ike Godzey of Store
dead fetus
unfilled ovaries dead cells
just a spam dump useless life no pump to make a bump
Haiku # 64352, April 25, 2019 7:37 pm ET
by Empty Balls of Empty Bellies
Outrunning the train
Jerking off in a bucket
Hung around my neck
Haiku # 64351, April 25, 2019 6:56 pm ET
by WTF
Time for discussions
Tales of brave cassowaries
Their heroic deeds
Haiku # 64350, April 25, 2019 6:52 pm ET
by Cassowary Bird!!!
Hands moving so fast
Bring the scent up to my nose
Flatulence! Nectar!
Haiku # 64349, April 25, 2019 6:50 pm ET
by Mindfully Yours
Can you imagine
If every time I bent over
Gold coins would spill out
Haiku # 64348, April 25, 2019 6:46 pm ET
by I
So what animal
are we allowed to discuss
and/or make fun of?

How about humans!
Looks like monkeys, tastes like pork.
And bad at haiku.
Haiku # 64347, April 25, 2019 6:21 pm ET
by
Perfume of Spring wind
Kimono drying on line
I stand here naked
Haiku # 64346, April 25, 2019 6:10 pm ET
by Kyoto Moon
Wind howling,"Eat me"
Cassowaries line dancing
Evil is afoot
Haiku # 64345, April 25, 2019 5:24 pm ET
by Noticer of Details
Hospitality
Unexpected guests welcome
For you, I spread legs
Haiku # 64344, April 25, 2019 5:19 pm ET
by Open
Around the table
Pass the gravy. Pass the salt
I love eating cock!
Haiku # 64343, April 25, 2019 5:15 pm ET
by Bottomless Jolie-Pitt
Proboscis monkeys!
Like there's a cock their face.
The ladies love it!
Haiku # 64342, April 25, 2019 5:04 pm ET
by Cock-nosed Billy.
Kim Jong's cum is good
But Donald Trump would agree
Putin's is better
Haiku # 64341, April 25, 2019 4:59 pm ET
by Probability of Impeachment
Ghee Whiz, processed food.
Blessed by a Hindu priestess.
By pissing in it.
Haiku # 64340, April 25, 2019 4:46 pm ET
by Indians are so weird.
Please cease and desist
With the thing about the damn
Cassowary bird.
Haiku # 64339, April 25, 2019 4:32 pm ET
by Edsel Dodo
Doc says you have worms
Take this pill and you
Haiku # 64338, April 25, 2019 4:11 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Jasmine rice, old cheese
The belly dancer jiggles
Her cunt in your face
Haiku # 64337, April 25, 2019 3:56 pm ET
by A call for smelling salts
Customer Service
We did not like the ark ride
Cassowary bird
Haiku # 64336, April 25, 2019 3:52 pm ET
by God is Great
Golden horizon
I piss out of car window
The future is now
Haiku # 64335, April 25, 2019 3:50 pm ET
by Fugitive
Much funny laughters
Big dildo assembly line
Take selfie with it
Haiku # 64334, April 25, 2019 3:44 pm ET
by Rubberdinx of China
Cassowary Bird
We are flightless bird mofos
You must obey us!
Haiku # 64333, April 25, 2019 3:41 pm ET
by Cassowary bird
Don't waste your eyesight
Look over this way at me
Look at my big eye
Haiku # 64332, April 25, 2019 2:10 pm ET
by Cyclops
the joestars are suck
they make me want to throw up
muda muda wry
Haiku # 64331, April 25, 2019 12:30 pm ET
by DIO of rly dark mansion
Teenage Figpucker
Masturbation in Session
"Got math homework, mom"
Haiku # 64330, April 25, 2019 12:17 pm ET
by All seeing eye of Horn Dog
I think it should be
Something much more slippery
Perhaps you try ghee?
Haiku # 64329, April 25, 2019 11:58 am ET
by Dr. Seuss of Stadium of Epic Masturbation
Butter or jelly
Which should I smear on my dick
When I masturbate?
Haiku # 64328, April 25, 2019 11:44 am ET
by Get out of My house
How would you like to
suck out the cordial cherries.
They'll give you cancer.
Haiku # 64327, April 25, 2019 6:52 am ET
by Lord Figpucker
Darth Fudgepacker guy
Package packed with chocolate
Back end Bon Bon Vox
Haiku # 64326, April 25, 2019 6:41 am ET
by U #2 of Unforgettable Fire in his ass
Dad always called you
"Good for nothing, little shit!"
Born out the back end
Haiku # 64325, April 25, 2019 6:37 am ET
by Backstreet Baby of Result of anal sex
Garden of Eden
Did people poop out the bum?
Did people have bums?
Haiku # 64324, April 25, 2019 6:33 am ET
by Noticer of Details
Someone once asked me
For my views on birth control
Stick to anal sex
Haiku # 64323, April 25, 2019 2:52 am ET
by Can of Worms
Our cunts are sealed up
No more of that for you pigs
Go hump animals!
Haiku # 64322, April 25, 2019 2:14 am ET
by Anonymous Poet of cunt
Blowjobs are awesome.
Retarded prostitutes too.
When you combine them...
Haiku # 64321, April 25, 2019 2:07 am ET
by Cuntfart Cuntfart of Cunt
Police in transit
Please stay on the line with us
Hide in your closet
Haiku # 64320, April 25, 2019 1:57 am ET
by Haiku Police
Looked out my window
Something very suspicious
Enjoyment of life
Haiku # 64319, April 25, 2019 1:35 am ET
by Window Pain of Ass
You know what's up now
They've got the DNA swab
They see your crab lice
Haiku # 64318, April 25, 2019 12:56 am ET
by Stalked
"To Serve and Protect"
In case of emergency
Dial 575
Haiku # 64317, April 25, 2019 12:11 am ET
by Haiku Police
When I pulled your dink
You danced like you were walking
Across red hot coals
Haiku # 64316, April 24, 2019 11:29 pm ET
by Dink Puller
Bend it like Beckham
So you can reach my G spot
The crowd is cheering
Haiku # 64315, April 24, 2019 11:26 pm ET
by Soccer Mom
Sexual soccer
Scoreless in regulation
Came in stoppage time
Haiku # 64314, April 24, 2019 11:18 pm ET
by Purveyor of Smut
Meow? ...
Meow? ...
Meow? ...
Haiku # 64313, April 24, 2019 11:14 pm ET
by Cat of House at 3 AM
It's kind of awkward
You and me out on the town
I'm a flightless bird
Haiku # 64312, April 24, 2019 11:07 pm ET
by Cassowary bird of Both feet on the ground
Cassowary Bird
Blissful. Plays didgeridoo
Oh wait, that s his bong
Haiku # 64311, April 24, 2019 10:01 pm ET
by Bird watcher
Tie yellow ribbon
Around Tony Orlando s
Tremendous penis!!
Haiku # 64310, April 24, 2019 9:57 pm ET
by No circumcision! No circumcision!!
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