Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 47 Days and 77437 Haiku later...

everything comes out
But maybe out the wrong end
And stains your good pants
Haiku # 63712, April 13, 2019 12:24 am ET
by Beanie Baby
Cream whipped to a froth
Dispensed from the limp penis
Of Mister Fritzl
Haiku # 63711, April 12, 2019 10:59 pm ET
by Practically Perverted
The Big Kahuna
You keep zipped up in your pants
Well, it ain't so big
Haiku # 63709, April 12, 2019 10:55 pm ET
by ShrinkyDink of Sink
Jesus still loves you.
No matter how you test Him.
Praise be to Jesus!
Haiku # 63708, April 12, 2019 8:13 pm ET
by TTGFP
Whipped cream or semen
Which is a better topping
For my strawberries?
Haiku # 63707, April 12, 2019 7:59 pm ET
by Follower of Satan
Loaves and fishes trick
Next, walking on water trick
Levitate table
Haiku # 63706, April 12, 2019 7:13 pm ET
by Dinner and a show of Wazzup Last Supper
Let's grab a fig leaf
Cover your sexual junque
And stop rubbing it
Haiku # 63705, April 12, 2019 7:10 pm ET
by Grad of Egads!
Do not waste your time
with that which is not of God.
Praise be to Jesus!
Haiku # 63704, April 12, 2019 7:01 pm ET
by TTGFP
Art class nude model
"What a swell looking penis."
Still life kielbasa
Haiku # 63703, April 12, 2019 3:09 pm ET
by Hide the Salami
Try New Oxy-Syllable
Removes filth from poetry
Tide Pods on steroids
Haiku # 63702, April 12, 2019 3:06 pm ET
by Jesus H Christmas
Smelly arthritis
Just had another birthday
How would I do that?
Haiku # 63701, April 12, 2019 12:37 pm ET
by Like an old cat
Today's your birthday
How I would jump on your desk
David Letterman
Haiku # 63700, April 12, 2019 12:35 pm ET
by Sag Tits
Kitten cat kitten
Cat cat kitten cat kitten
Kitten cat kitten
Haiku # 63699, April 12, 2019 12:33 pm ET
by Kitten of Star
Yo, Spermin' Melville
Just met you, this is crazy
So call me Ishmael
Haiku # 63698, April 12, 2019 12:31 pm ET
by Maybe Dick of Hump like a snow hill
Sometimes I wonder
If I were a prostitute
How much would I charge?
Haiku # 63697, April 12, 2019 10:28 am ET
by Cause of Your depression
I'm in my forties
I've yet to fuck a shemale
But I still have time
Haiku # 63696, April 12, 2019 9:20 am ET
by Subject of Your nightmare
Farts are not profane
You must have flunked science class
Farts contain methane
Haiku # 63695, April 12, 2019 9:01 am ET
by Mike Roeb of At Work
Japanese House Tour
Traditional floor mats spooged
I removed my shoes
Haiku # 63694, April 12, 2019 8:58 am ET
by Barefoot Bandit of Running the other way
Ever wonder why
My haiku's are so profane?
If not,suck my dick
Haiku # 63693, April 12, 2019 8:55 am ET
by Sick of Your shit
My contribution
Are farts tax deductible?
We'll be millionaires
Haiku # 63692, April 12, 2019 8:53 am ET
by Splat Methaney
Is that the foghorn?
Rise and shine. I'm on the case
Well now, who farted?
Haiku # 63691, April 12, 2019 8:37 am ET
by Noticer of Details
When I bend over
Look closely at my black hole
Now take a picture
Haiku # 63690, April 12, 2019 4:08 am ET
by Science is amazing
His sandals were dope
Flowing hair impressed the babes
Fonz of Nazareth
Haiku # 63689, April 12, 2019 2:42 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Seven eleven
Or was it the six six six
He liked to shoplift
Haiku # 63688, April 12, 2019 2:41 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
He rode on an ass
To the store to fetch bread
He waved to the whores
Haiku # 63687, April 12, 2019 2:40 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
He went to the store
For a loaf of bread he said
And a piece of ass
Haiku # 63686, April 12, 2019 2:38 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Let us not forget
Moses was a warlord too.
Praise be to Jesus.

For "enlightenment"
Buddha left his family.
Praise be to Jesus.

It can be said that
Jesus is the Lord of Peace.
Praise be to Jesus!
Haiku # 63685, April 12, 2019 2:32 am ET
by TTGFP. The Lord Jesus was ahead of his time.
Mohammed Shamu
Give that as your alias
The best way to go
Haiku # 63684, April 12, 2019 2:31 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Never had a doubt
Picked you out of the lineup
Saw your half inch knob
Haiku # 63683, April 12, 2019 2:29 am ET
by Tattletale
Vaseline in bulk
Massaging a dead tree trunk
Whilst defecating
Haiku # 63682, April 12, 2019 2:27 am ET
by Gruuuuuunt
Vagitarian
Creamed corn beef and muff cabbage
Face down in your plate
Haiku # 63681, April 12, 2019 2:24 am ET
by Butter Bean of Smelly Peen
Moohamad=dead pork
Warlord tyrant false prophet
"The Obvious One"
^ also a pedophile
don't get used to me agreeing with you
Haiku # 63680, April 12, 2019 2:14 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Please buy this for me
It's on Amazon dot com
Cat Butts in Space book
Haiku # 63679, April 12, 2019 1:59 am ET
by It's a coloring book of Starkitten wants this please
Moohamad=dead pork
Warlord tyrant false prophet
"The Obvious One"
Haiku # 63678, April 12, 2019 1:33 am ET
by La Illaha Ill A FARRRTTTT !
Now it's dark again
When I jump from the bushes
You will be startled
Haiku # 63677, April 12, 2019 12:52 am ET
by Creep of Bushes
over in Japan
Hurry up soba noodles
Hangry robot dance
Haiku # 63676, April 11, 2019 11:54 pm ET
by Part Insect of Radioactive
Thought you said
Blow job you know giving head
I'll get my ears checked
Haiku # 63675, April 11, 2019 11:47 pm ET
by Miracle ear of Up 2 streets Take a left
You apologize
For a misunderstanding
You end up ahead
Haiku # 63674, April 11, 2019 11:46 pm ET
by Sorry of My Bad
Not the kind of guy
Who would spend money on you
For a fancy meal
Haiku # 63673, April 11, 2019 11:27 pm ET
by Spam it is
While you weren't looking
Repossessed your possessions
Then I pooped on them
Haiku # 63672, April 11, 2019 11:25 pm ET
by Stan
Possessed by myself
Verifying process then
Possessing myself
Haiku # 63671, April 11, 2019 11:10 pm ET
by MONARCH of Deja Vu
Most of my haiku
Gems remotely harvested
Hidden sphincter mine
Haiku # 63670, April 11, 2019 10:52 pm ET
by Digger Barnes
Japanese Robot
Forehead bagel conniption
Train station blow job
Haiku # 63669, April 11, 2019 10:49 pm ET
by Waiting
Not very clean now
After my bathroom blowout
Hey, how you down'?
Haiku # 63668, April 11, 2019 10:43 pm ET
by Friend
Waddle waddle squat
Fart fart squelch fart fart kersplat
Microbes at work here
Haiku # 63667, April 11, 2019 10:41 pm ET
by Mike Roeb of Work
Under the big wave
Washing my huge smelly ass
Polluting the sea
Haiku # 63666, April 11, 2019 10:39 pm ET
by Clean for a minute
Tofu excrement
Fresh churned through hippie buttocks
Won't harsh your mellow
Haiku # 63665, April 11, 2019 10:34 pm ET
by Greasy Dean
I'm at a gay bar
Doing the boot scoot boogie
Got a day-glo dong
Haiku # 63664, April 11, 2019 10:32 pm ET
by Colorful Individual
I know God is real.
Butterflies are beautiful.
Praise be to Jesus.
Haiku # 63663, April 11, 2019 10:17 pm ET
by TTGFP
And God so loved Man
that He gave His only Son.
Praise be to Jesus!
Haiku # 63662, April 11, 2019 10:15 pm ET
by TTGFP
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