Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
24 Years, 182 Days and 70640 Haikus later...

My contribution
Are farts tax deductible?
We'll be millionaires
Haiku # 63692, April 12, 2019 8:53 am ET
by Splat Methaney
Is that the foghorn?
Rise and shine. I'm on the case
Well now, who farted?
Haiku # 63691, April 12, 2019 8:37 am ET
by Noticer of Details
When I bend over
Look closely at my black hole
Now take a picture
Haiku # 63690, April 12, 2019 4:08 am ET
by Science is amazing
His sandals were dope
Flowing hair impressed the babes
Fonz of Nazareth
Haiku # 63689, April 12, 2019 2:42 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Seven eleven
Or was it the six six six
He liked to shoplift
Haiku # 63688, April 12, 2019 2:41 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
He rode on an ass
To the store to fetch bread
He waved to the whores
Haiku # 63687, April 12, 2019 2:40 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
He went to the store
For a loaf of bread he said
And a piece of ass
Haiku # 63686, April 12, 2019 2:38 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Let us not forget
Moses was a warlord too.
Praise be to Jesus.

For "enlightenment"
Buddha left his family.
Praise be to Jesus.

It can be said that
Jesus is the Lord of Peace.
Praise be to Jesus!
Haiku # 63685, April 12, 2019 2:32 am ET
by TTGFP. The Lord Jesus was ahead of his time.
Mohammed Shamu
Give that as your alias
The best way to go
Haiku # 63684, April 12, 2019 2:31 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Never had a doubt
Picked you out of the lineup
Saw your half inch knob
Haiku # 63683, April 12, 2019 2:29 am ET
by Tattletale
Vaseline in bulk
Massaging a dead tree trunk
Whilst defecating
Haiku # 63682, April 12, 2019 2:27 am ET
by Gruuuuuunt
Creamed corn beef and muff cabbage
Face down in your plate
Haiku # 63681, April 12, 2019 2:24 am ET
by Butter Bean of Smelly Peen
Moohamad=dead pork
Warlord tyrant false prophet
"The Obvious One"
^ also a pedophile
don't get used to me agreeing with you
Haiku # 63680, April 12, 2019 2:14 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Please buy this for me
It's on Amazon dot com
Cat Butts in Space book
Haiku # 63679, April 12, 2019 1:59 am ET
by It's a coloring book of Starkitten wants this please
Moohamad=dead pork
Warlord tyrant false prophet
"The Obvious One"
Haiku # 63678, April 12, 2019 1:33 am ET
by La Illaha Ill A FARRRTTTT !
Now it's dark again
When I jump from the bushes
You will be startled
Haiku # 63677, April 12, 2019 12:52 am ET
by Creep of Bushes
over in Japan
Hurry up soba noodles
Hangry robot dance
Haiku # 63676, April 11, 2019 11:54 pm ET
by Part Insect of Radioactive
Thought you said
Blow job you know giving head
I'll get my ears checked
Haiku # 63675, April 11, 2019 11:47 pm ET
by Miracle ear of Up 2 streets Take a left
You apologize
For a misunderstanding
You end up ahead
Haiku # 63674, April 11, 2019 11:46 pm ET
by Sorry of My Bad
Not the kind of guy
Who would spend money on you
For a fancy meal
Haiku # 63673, April 11, 2019 11:27 pm ET
by Spam it is
While you weren't looking
Repossessed your possessions
Then I pooped on them
Haiku # 63672, April 11, 2019 11:25 pm ET
by Stan
Possessed by myself
Verifying process then
Possessing myself
Haiku # 63671, April 11, 2019 11:10 pm ET
by MONARCH of Deja Vu
Most of my haiku
Gems remotely harvested
Hidden sphincter mine
Haiku # 63670, April 11, 2019 10:52 pm ET
by Digger Barnes
Japanese Robot
Forehead bagel conniption
Train station blow job
Haiku # 63669, April 11, 2019 10:49 pm ET
by Waiting
Not very clean now
After my bathroom blowout
Hey, how you down'?
Haiku # 63668, April 11, 2019 10:43 pm ET
by Friend
Waddle waddle squat
Fart fart squelch fart fart kersplat
Microbes at work here
Haiku # 63667, April 11, 2019 10:41 pm ET
by Mike Roeb of Work
Under the big wave
Washing my huge smelly ass
Polluting the sea
Haiku # 63666, April 11, 2019 10:39 pm ET
by Clean for a minute
Tofu excrement
Fresh churned through hippie buttocks
Won't harsh your mellow
Haiku # 63665, April 11, 2019 10:34 pm ET
by Greasy Dean
I'm at a gay bar
Doing the boot scoot boogie
Got a day-glo dong
Haiku # 63664, April 11, 2019 10:32 pm ET
by Colorful Individual
I know God is real.
Butterflies are beautiful.
Praise be to Jesus.
Haiku # 63663, April 11, 2019 10:17 pm ET
And God so loved Man
that He gave His only Son.
Praise be to Jesus!
Haiku # 63662, April 11, 2019 10:15 pm ET
You're grounded for life
Hurts me more than it hurts you
Praise be to Allah!
Haiku # 63660, April 11, 2019 8:50 pm ET
by Noticer of Details
Jesus the Hotshot
Like a bat straight out of Hell
On the Hoverboard
Haiku # 63659, April 11, 2019 8:47 pm ET
by Noticer of Details of Looking on
Italian stallion
Stalking your tuna meatball
Fat sausage in hand
Haiku # 63658, April 11, 2019 8:41 pm ET
by Rural Guido of Garden of overripe vaginas
Don't believe Satan.
If you do, you'll burn in Hell!
Praise be to Jesus!
Haiku # 63656, April 11, 2019 8:10 pm ET
We are all equal
in the eyes of our Maker.
Praise be to Jesus!

Regardless of your
favorite ice cream flavor.
Praise be to Jesus!
Haiku # 63655, April 11, 2019 7:41 pm ET
By loving Jesus
you can better love mankind.
Praise be to Jesus!
Haiku # 63654, April 11, 2019 7:37 pm ET
Do not worship cats.
Though they saved man from the plague.
Praise be to Jesus!

You should thank the Lord.
God told cats to eat the rats.
Praise be to Jesus!
Haiku # 63653, April 11, 2019 7:32 pm ET
cats cats kittens cats
Kittens kittens kittens cats
Cats cats kittens cats
Haiku # 63652, April 11, 2019 7:15 pm ET
by Starkitten of Whisker City
What you're made of
Mostly water and dead skin
No wonder life's hard
Haiku # 63651, April 11, 2019 7:10 pm ET
by Who remastered scientist of Whoremaster Asteroid
Oops, forgot to sign.
Forgetting is not a sin.
Praise be to Jesus!
Haiku # 63650, April 11, 2019 6:45 pm ET
Cleansed of my anger
and filth that poisoned my mind.
Praise be to Jesus!
Haiku # 63649, April 11, 2019 6:43 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I'd never do that!
Lev. eighteen twenty-two.
Praise be to Jesus!
Haiku # 63648, April 11, 2019 6:40 pm ET
by Twinkle Toes Glitter Fairy Princess
Giving up coffee.
With Jesus you can quit drugs.
Praise be to Jesus!
Haiku # 63647, April 11, 2019 6:36 pm ET
by Twinkle Toes Glitter Fairy Princess
Oh, glorious day.
I greet it with open arms.
Praise be to Jesus!
Haiku # 63646, April 11, 2019 6:33 pm ET
by Twinkle Toes Glitter Fairy Princess
I could be in porn
If I don't mind getting AIDS
Mostly on weekends
Haiku # 63644, April 11, 2019 3:50 pm ET
by Scared of My own shadow
Look into my eyes
Are you scared of The Devil
Look into my eyes
Haiku # 63643, April 11, 2019 3:08 pm ET
by Benny Mardones of Perverted Flying Carpet
This site should not be
So very very boring.
What happened to it?
Haiku # 63642, April 11, 2019 2:53 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Rustle up some grub
Smell what The Rock is cooking
Burned the Last Supper
Haiku # 63641, April 11, 2019 2:52 pm ET
by Churchgoer of Pizza Spaghetti Monster Cathedral
Sarcasm will not
Save or impress anyone
I so pity you
Haiku # 63640, April 11, 2019 2:47 pm ET
by Ghost of Christmas
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