Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 136 Days and 76969 Haiku later...

Presbyterian:
Dead babies and billionaires
(Alice Cooper song)
Haiku # 62829, March 9, 2019 7:55 am ET
by Vincent Furnier of Boa around My Neck (not feather)
Late winter snowfall
Lone bird chirps. Frost-covered branch
PPRPPTFF. Darth farts, loudly.
Haiku # 62828, March 9, 2019 7:49 am ET
by Basho's Mother
How 'bout those Hindus.
Some right silly deities.
But they've got big tits.
Haiku # 62827, March 9, 2019 1:48 am ET
by df
Have you sinned today?
Remember, if you don't sin,
Jesus died in vain.
Haiku # 62826, March 9, 2019 1:45 am ET
by df
Let's go on Maury.
Darth, yes you are the father!
Cough up child support.
Haiku # 62825, March 9, 2019 1:42 am ET
by df
You were really drunk.
I don't think you'd remember.
But pics are online.
Haiku # 62824, March 9, 2019 1:39 am ET
by df
Could not be pregnant
Unless you can get that way
Thinking dirty thoughts
Haiku # 62823, March 9, 2019 12:03 am ET
by Pickle Cravings
Fools gold down his pants
Mine shaft caved in round the back
Eight midgets feared dead
Haiku # 62822, March 9, 2019 12:01 am ET
by The horror!!
Would you ask Jesus
where he got his nails done?
Get it - his nails!
Haiku # 62821, March 8, 2019 11:21 pm ET
by Please don't be cross with me.
Which animal's shit
stinks worse than all the others.
Fill your car with it.

You smell like haiku!
Subtly offensive, yet...
No, it's not subtle.

The shit of dingos
that ate genocide babies
at blood-diamond graves.

That's what you smell like.
You dead stupid billionaire.
Praise the golden cock!

Worship erections.
Boner pokes through your coffin.
Gold diggers' respect.
Haiku # 62820, March 8, 2019 11:20 pm ET
by Boners, dead babies, and farts. Yippee! of Oh, and dead billionaires too! Hooray!
You must be pregnant.
What should we name our baby?
Figpucker Junior?
Haiku # 62819, March 8, 2019 11:09 pm ET
by df
Why do I crave ham?
I want kosher dill pickles
I could drink the brine
Haiku # 62818, March 8, 2019 11:04 pm ET
by I must be crazy
blizzard shoots snow spears
white blanket eight feet deep covers
stirring snowdrops bulbs sprout
Haiku # 62817, March 8, 2019 11:01 pm ET
by Christos Victor of now
We can t get married
Until I introduce you
To my big chin hair
Haiku # 62816, March 8, 2019 10:55 pm ET
by Let s do this right
We can
Haiku # 62815, March 8, 2019 10:54 pm ET
by Lets do this right
When was the last time
You really had a good day
Do you remember?
Haiku # 62814, March 8, 2019 10:46 pm ET
by Cliff Flinger
Darkened corridor
Sign says HAPPY BIRTHDAY Darth
Is this the psych ward?
Haiku # 62813, March 8, 2019 10:38 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Plans for the weekend
Nail trimming, pimple popping
Nervous pacing, more sighing
Haiku # 62812, March 8, 2019 10:34 pm ET
by Busy
Trespassers footsteps
I set up a booby trap
Caught him in my bra
Haiku # 62811, March 8, 2019 9:59 pm ET
by Jugs Malone
Trespassers footsteps
I
Haiku # 62810, March 8, 2019 9:58 pm ET
by Jugs Malone
Hey we aint babies
We live here under her skirts
Circus fat lady
Haiku # 62809, March 8, 2019 9:55 pm ET
by Big Time of Big Top
Delivery room
Hairy midget octuplets
All born fully clothed

Haiku # 62808, March 8, 2019 9:53 pm ET
by Big Time of Big Top
Delivery room
Hairy midget octuplets
All born fully clothed

Haiku # 62807, March 8, 2019 9:52 pm ET
by Big Time of Big Top
Drinks are on the house
All you can eat surf and turf
Try our homemade pies
Haiku # 62806, March 8, 2019 9:46 pm ET
by Out of business
First it was Fleshlght
You doink hairy coconut?
Cue Merv Griffin song
Haiku # 62805, March 8, 2019 8:52 pm ET
by Starkitten
Just one more update:
straight to hell with Globalism.

(what is "Globalism"?)
Haiku # 62804, March 8, 2019 8:05 pm ET
by Idiots Watching MSM of Newspeak Over Your Daddy's Grave
When I said "I do"
I got tropical pussy
until it gets old.
Haiku # 62803, March 8, 2019 7:23 pm ET
by Nut Brown Maiden of My Dreams
Shut your cat-pussy.
Don't even bother. Just STOP.
Library of lies.
Haiku # 62802, March 8, 2019 7:20 pm ET
by I am worse than "MOXIE" of Old Archived Poems
Meanwhile Wong Lofan
Must be watching Hannity
and dreaming of past.
Haiku # 62801, March 8, 2019 7:16 pm ET
by Grave of online futility
I will write and write.
More poetic farts released.
Now it smells like Darth.
Haiku # 62800, March 8, 2019 7:12 pm ET
by Darth Fig-Kitten of NW Fart Library of Stars
Ok sorry I
am just a humble haiku
in your bright toilet
Haiku # 62799, March 8, 2019 7:09 pm ET
by Darth and Starkitten of bring out the worst in me
Jap Haiku suck-wad.
Eat my syllabic content.
Your mother's foul spawn.
Haiku # 62798, March 8, 2019 7:06 pm ET
by Conservative of The New Counter-Culture with guns
Girls in the Boy Scouts?
Only if they get naked!
That would be okay.
Haiku # 62797, March 8, 2019 7:04 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Haiku shut fuck-face
You vile piece of stinking verse...
May your dead soul burn.
Haiku # 62796, March 8, 2019 7:03 pm ET
by That goes for all of you of KISS MY ASSURANCE OF FAITH ALL CAPS
The holy union
Of the Lamb and His pure bride.
Now suck on it, fool.
Haiku # 62795, March 8, 2019 7:00 pm ET
by Jesus will judge your sorry ass of I'm supposed to LOVE you...
Orange judge your ass.
Shut up you filthy mouth-hole
Trump plus Jesus. YES !
Haiku # 62794, March 8, 2019 6:34 pm ET
by Whine about Cheeto-man but you still suck of Day Late Dollar Short
When you say I DO
The mousetrap slams down on it
Now smile and say cheese
Haiku # 62793, March 8, 2019 5:06 pm ET
by I don't
Don't get married
Dudes! do not! it is a trap!
You will be sorry!
Haiku # 62792, March 8, 2019 5:01 pm ET
by Walt Tripp of Black Duck Mn.
Masturbation Scouts
Everybody earns a badge
Goal: Spread eagle scout
Haiku # 62791, March 8, 2019 4:55 pm ET
by Cat Raver of End of banana
Girls join the boy scouts?
Morons rule the universe!
leftist idiots...

Stupid is as does.
Haiku # 62790, March 8, 2019 4:50 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
In my opinion
It's a good thing when you sneeze
It isn't a fart
Haiku # 62789, March 8, 2019 4:44 pm ET
by Glass half full of Wonderful World of Wondering
Orange tornado
Windiest wind we have seen
Blowing from his mouth
Haiku # 62788, March 8, 2019 3:35 pm ET
by Tornado of Foolishness
If you go to jail
I will visit your penis
Through the cold steel bars
Haiku # 62787, March 8, 2019 2:39 pm ET
by Sister Prejac of Soy lent green mile
Mathmagician act
Watch him count on his fingers
Fingers disappear

Digital exam
A butthole how do you do
Now, let us fist bump
Haiku # 62786, March 8, 2019 2:36 pm ET
by What did I just watch of Tootsie rolls factory
Augmented matrix.
A matrix with fake titties.
Failed algebra.
Haiku # 62785, March 8, 2019 2:25 pm ET
by df [1 2 3] ( o )( o )
A dead mosquito.
Big nose, spindly little legs.
Like an ex girlfriend.
Haiku # 62784, March 8, 2019 2:22 pm ET
by And sucks as hard too!
Like that billionaire,
Perhaps I'll get augmented,
Dead with huge "manhood".
Haiku # 62783, March 8, 2019 2:20 pm ET
by Man hood on your manhood. Foreskin afterthought. Not Jewish.
This poem is short.
Indeed just like my penis.
I think I will cry.
Haiku # 62782, March 8, 2019 2:12 pm ET
by df
is it Mike Stivic?
Or Porch poet Shaggy do
He ate my toppings!
Haiku # 62781, March 8, 2019 12:10 pm ET
by Lovebeads of 17 foot tall hippie robot
Ordered hot Gumbo
A miscommunication (Dumbo flies tonight)
Unexpected bliss
All midget male choir
Elephants never forget
Trunk suction blowjob
Haiku # 62780, March 8, 2019 12:07 pm ET
by See my dust of Sawdust
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