Hawaii was my first night out of legal age. I injested enough pineapples and psychedelics to knock out an entire commune. Only had one legitimate alcoholic drink and that

I think I know you
Did you work in Alaska?
If not, it

And the circus tent
Ok, those are my stretch pants
Off to the next town

I stand corrected
Those bearded ladies I saw
That was a mirror

I'm no fuckin' snitch.
Neighbors could have dead bodies.
I won't tell the pigs.

Cooperation.
Yip yip yip yip yip yip yip.
Uh huh, yip yip yip.

Reminiscing of
the good old days when only
Bird could see Snuffy.

That pinball machine
counting to twelve was a trip.
Uncle Bob's acid.

That explains a lot.
I need to go to Cali
where the good drugs are.

Remember to call the police and inform them of your neighbors. It doesn

Open sesame
Too late the seed is in your
Sesame seed buns

Alien morsels.
Chocolate not of this world.
Saved by a monster.

I'm quite new to this.
Never had my ass eaten.
Same time tomorrow?

Bring Bert and Ernie.
But you can have all the chips.
Alien love seeds.

Standing room only
It

Bearded ladies sashaying past my circus tent. Not to boast, but it is true I make a living traveling from city to town displaying my enormous member. I have just finished polishing the business end of things and once everyone is seated and tickets have been collected......

Bearded ladies sashaying past my circus tent. Not to boast, but it

I can

Down here on the floor
Say, you have such shapely gams.
Blessed with three of them!

Blue Furry Hard On
Cookie Monster Arous ed
Me Love a Chocolate Chip

Asshole not too far
Phantom Tollbooth Cookie Hoke
Use blue fur poker

Me glad you enjoy
Me eat chocolate chip
Eat smelly brown dough

This Murkan agrees.
I'd never heard of Smollett
till this fiasco.

It is not fake news,
but it's sure irrelevant.
That's what 'Murkins love.

Poor Jussie Smollett.
Had SO much going for him:
Black, gay, hated Trump. . .

A chocolate chip.
Implanted deep in my ass.
Those damn aliens.

You will order lunch
Drop to your knees in the line
Both arms outstretched

Demand pickle juice
If you are able to speak
Ask for a refill

I've seen the Gill Man
Shapeshifting Reptillian
Casual sunset

Where did I leave off..oh yes, and furthermore, you will be asked to walk away from all you have ever known. The unfamiliar will be the new familiar. Don't bother to analyze what you are becoming. There is no turning back or chance for repair. Your chip was implanted decades ago.

I saw that movie
Delivery guy left tip
Bobbitt Residence

That's sure is funny.
Pizza's exactly what came.
Then so did your wife.

Forget common sense
Reptilian orchestration
You can't escape this

in the here and now
It used to be the future
Now it is the past

It incenses me
Hippies foul their bell bottoms
Cow farts are bad, too.

Extra thin sliced clit
Not unlike Italian salami
With extra tang

What a lovely world.
Hindus foul their own rivers.
Somalis slice clits.

Forget everything that you were thinking before you learned the truth. It will no longer serve your needs. When the seventeen foot tall robots knock your foot down you will understand what is coming next and it ain't a pizza

Except for my own personal reasons I don't think I can do this again but it has to be a great idea for the new law to make the case to be a better source of information about how it is. If you can catch my drift, you know what I want to say about the new world of foolishness and the new law of the republic. We're without any free will and therefore it makes sense to just sit back and relax and focus on eating sleeping and bowel movements

Henceforth you'll be called...
Darth Funtcart, Lord of Savage.
Rise, my apprentice.

Okay, enough fun.
Got to feed my dinosaur.
She's an herbivore.

There are only two,
the master and apprentice.
Starkitten's neither.

Though he's unaware,
Cuntfart is my apprentice.
Shit flows from his pen.

A slow trickle now.
But soon to be a geyser.
Old faithful shit spew.

Masturbatory!
Holy schlong shlappers, Batman,
get the Vaseline!

Just like Bono said
We're one but we're not the same


Darth, Starkitten

We're all getting full
But the demon inside growls
EAT EAT EAT EAT EAT

I know how you feel.
I also become evil
when craving pasta.

Spaghetti monster
You live inside my body
You make me do this

Melodious farts
Bringing joy to the workplace
Now, roll up your sleeves

Bad Haiku phone call
Hello?? Who's calling?
Cuntfart Cuntfart Cunt

Used to have it all
But it didn't bring me joy
So I threw it out

Hippie gorp glutton
Fouled your bell bottoms again
Lay off the seeds, man

What would they call it?

If cats made cottage cheese

My guess: Cattage Cheese

Adjust the gonads
Rollerblading dynamo
Ladies, form a line

Every day the same
It should just be called Sameday
Thank G-d,it's Sameday!

Haiku on Sunday
Might be considered a sin
Yelled from the pulpit

Outside Tastee-Freeze
The sucking of chili dogs
The melancholy

Sipping beverages
I'm slurping to annoy you
Pal, its my nature.

Poor old man Grundy
Goose splatter feces oatmeal
Breakfasting outside

Purple lily pad
Someone kissed a purple frog
That's where Prince came from