Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 136 Days and 76969 Haiku later...

Promise not to laugh
My fart is my best feature
Savory and sweet
Haiku # 62175, February 13, 2019 2:48 am ET
by A work of fart of Hanging in the loo
Low flying saucer
Look! Green alien, JoJo
Hurling rotten eggs
Haiku # 62174, February 13, 2019 2:44 am ET
by I'm telling
Santorum harvest
Hark! The Skinflute whistle blows
Work, Oompa Loompas!
Haiku # 62173, February 13, 2019 12:35 am ET
by Undercover Boss of Wonka
Velveeta cheese food.
Hydrogenated butt lube.
Processed santorum.

Trump hair yellow dye.
Disodium mastearbate.
One percent cheddar.
Haiku # 62172, February 13, 2019 12:24 am ET
by Lord Figpucker
Baloney sandwich
Stuck to the roof of my house
The seagulls will feast
Haiku # 62171, February 12, 2019 11:54 pm ET
by Clumsy of Pacific Northwest
I said have not gave usomnofabiotch
Haiku # 62170, February 12, 2019 11:51 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
My, how you gave grown
Those penis enlargement pills
But aren't they for men?
Haiku # 62169, February 12, 2019 11:51 pm ET
by Clitorisaurus of Yourasskicked Park
I pee in the streets
Make zig zag pattern and swirls
I just might be drunk
Haiku # 62168, February 12, 2019 11:14 pm ET
by drunk of Fell off barstool
all your shitholes are belong to us

chinese communist infiltration?
Haiku # 62167, February 12, 2019 10:20 pm ET
by vhs
I can
Haiku # 62166, February 12, 2019 9:14 pm ET
by Upside of Everything
Substandard living.
Flies, mosquitoes, rotting filth,
ugly prostitutes.

They talk a good speech
in the land of hypocrites.
Ethics and Morals.

They pee in the streets,
Crazy people walk naked,
You can't jog shirtless!
Haiku # 62165, February 12, 2019 8:54 pm ET
by df
all your pigfuckers are belong to us
Haiku # 62164, February 12, 2019 8:53 pm ET
by vhs
But only that once!
being right once in your life...
each dog has its day.

But that was not nice.
Comparing trump to a dog.
Dogs are not that bad.

They make a great stew!
Can't say I'd want to eat trump.
That's for Russian whores.

And you're incorrect.
I am not into shit holes.
Only shit poems.
Haiku # 62163, February 12, 2019 8:45 pm ET
by Shit shit shit and more shit.
Figpucker admits
Regarding his favorite hole:
Donald Trump was RIGHT !
Haiku # 62162, February 12, 2019 8:21 pm ET
by I Cannot Believe My
Recycle chopstick
Use as tool pick nose.Pick ass
Picasso! Paintbrush
Haiku # 62161, February 12, 2019 8:12 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Speaking of Buddha
Walk to store for loaf of bread
Come back Enlightened

He went to Hooters
Blew his whole wad at the joint
Felt 10 pounds lighter
Haiku # 62160, February 12, 2019 7:59 pm ET
by Booder
I think I'm jealous
of the man who married the
pillowcase. Sexy!
Haiku # 62159, February 12, 2019 6:12 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
So, if Buddha left
his wife and kids to become
"enlightened"... well then...
Haiku # 62158, February 12, 2019 6:11 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
"Fresh" and "Philippines"
do not belong together.
Nothing stays fresh here.

Refrigeration?
Newfangled electronics.
That's for rich people!

Donald Trump was right
when he said "shit hole countries".
But only that once.
Haiku # 62157, February 12, 2019 6:08 pm ET
by Garth Pigfucker
Sad boy lonely man
He married a pillowcase
Everyone else laugh
Haiku # 62156, February 12, 2019 5:06 pm ET
by Someone else of Laughing
Hospital for dolls
Mistreated by rough perverts
Inflatable babes
Haiku # 62155, February 12, 2019 5:04 pm ET
by Air Blower of Nozzle
Real kung fu is bad.
It can kill with either hand.
But not what you think.

Kill the beer belly
And the deep dark depression
And the feeling sloth.
Haiku # 62154, February 12, 2019 4:36 pm ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
That God Almighty
He plays favorites dontcha think?
He like you better
Haiku # 62153, February 12, 2019 11:54 am ET
by That ain't saying much of Smote Avoider
Mini Lunchables
Made with fresh Fromunda Cheese
From the Phillipines
Haiku # 62152, February 12, 2019 11:52 am ET
by They love potato stix too
My cock scabs flake off.
Add salt and call them jerky.
Perfect school lunch snack.
Haiku # 62151, February 12, 2019 9:17 am ET
by Boo!
all your haikus are belong to us
Haiku # 62150, February 12, 2019 8:33 am ET
by vhs
My haiku's are bad
Much worse than your are joker
Try to prove me wrong

You have to suffer
If you want to sing the blues
Same thing with haikus
Haiku # 62149, February 12, 2019 6:17 am ET
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Some day you will go
Where no one can follow you
You win the big prize!
Haiku # 62148, February 12, 2019 6:08 am ET
by Shadow Rat of Lodi
Las Vegas buffet
Inconceivable crab legs
Shared unshellfishly
Haiku # 62147, February 11, 2019 10:44 pm ET
by Nice Guy of Vegas
The snowman won't melt
Like Everest ornaments
Garden gnome grotesque
Haiku # 62146, February 11, 2019 10:37 pm ET
by Conversation piece of Redrum
well if you have some
one chase you about hotel
haunted...they might just

be all work and no
play make jaaack...go crazy man
i think he was mad

about the chicken salad......sandwich...
Haiku # 62145, February 11, 2019 8:19 pm ET
by vhs
Father stood outside
Admiring the fresh snowfall
Found his corpse that Spring
Haiku # 62144, February 11, 2019 8:08 pm ET
by Gone daddy-o
They took to the streets
High on fructose corn syrup
The day the dead walked
Haiku # 62143, February 11, 2019 7:53 pm ET
by Morning People of Running
say what he says what
then whut then who then word
up and down around
Haiku # 62142, February 11, 2019 7:42 pm ET
by vhs
Lay it on the line
Let's what you've got in there
Haikuvian brain
Haiku # 62141, February 11, 2019 7:01 pm ET
by Show it of Bend over and show it
They are still working
On my fooking hut gawd damn!
They are damn useless

Can't do the job jerks
totally incompetent dorks
you are fired! chit birds!
Haiku # 62140, February 11, 2019 6:54 pm ET
by Rude hovel dweller of Black Duck Mn.
Abort Socialism.
Behold my brave new slogan:
ABORT SOCIALISM!
Haiku # 62139, February 11, 2019 5:01 pm ET
by Aldous Orwell of Haiku Animal Farm
Cephalopod Toss
Big tsunami wave don't care
8 arms in the air
Haiku # 62138, February 11, 2019 2:52 pm ET
by Give it up for Bruno Mars of 24 K magic
I am Starkitten
I am the one and only
I am Starkitten
Haiku # 62137, February 11, 2019 2:49 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
i dont give a shit
about pc dickbags. theyre too
confused about me
Haiku # 62136, February 11, 2019 8:40 am ET
by vhs
rage with not against
the wall of shitposting it
all falls down down... down

its badhaiku...ok?
Haiku # 62135, February 11, 2019 8:39 am ET
by vhs
I also struggle
with rage against bad haiku.
And I'm the problem!
Haiku # 62134, February 11, 2019 8:06 am ET
by Rage Against the Bad Haiku Machine
Popping big pimples
First job flipping grease burgers humping everything
Haiku # 62133, February 11, 2019 3:57 am ET
by Roger Daltrey of Talking bout my macular degeneration
No time for kissing
Texts to text. Facebook to check have a emoji
Haiku # 62132, February 11, 2019 3:53 am ET
by Man whom married a pillowcase of Bedroom
She kissed my cheek
Then ran out to my old car
Said, "I am sorry."

"Sorry I did that"
Even a friendly cheek peck
Is verboten now.

I thought to myself
even the women are scared
of harmless friendship

PC destruction
Of human interaction
will come back to you.
Haiku # 62131, February 11, 2019 1:58 am ET
by Revolted Counter Revolutionary of Moscow Idaho
When the world blows up
I hope we hear Dr Ruth
Moaning in climax
Haiku # 62130, February 11, 2019 12:08 am ET
by A wish of Earth
i fucking hate the
times i get pissed off over
stuff posted on this

site, i think do i
need to out do the worthless
70 year old math teacher

who should be dead by
now or might die in 2 or 3
years if i dont give

a shit anymore, pent
up Satanic feelings hiding
behind a xtian

veneer, then burst out
anger retires, a few harsh words
then silence, what then?
Haiku # 62129, February 10, 2019 11:46 pm ET
by vhs
and while youre at it
nephew, bend over...you like it
that way for, daddy huh?

is daddy a crip and you a blood?
Haiku # 62128, February 10, 2019 11:26 pm ET
by vhs
hmm, go fuck yourself Inglewood
Go back to jerking off to
pictures of Crips sucking my dick
Haiku # 62127, February 10, 2019 11:24 pm ET
by vhs
Radio talk show
Haiku poets with big dinks
The show was cancelled
Haiku # 62126, February 10, 2019 10:44 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
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