BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
23 Years
196 Days
67572 Haikus
Cephalopod Toss
Big tsunami wave don't care
8 arms in the air
Haiku #62138, by Give it up for Bruno Mars of 24 K magic
February 11, 2019 2:52 pm ET

I am Starkitten
I am the one and only
I am Starkitten
Haiku #62137, by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
February 11, 2019 2:49 pm ET

i dont give a shit
about pc dickbags. theyre too
confused about me
Haiku #62136, by vhs
February 11, 2019 8:40 am ET

rage with not against
the wall of shitposting it
all falls down down... down

its badhaiku...ok?
Haiku #62135, by vhs
February 11, 2019 8:39 am ET

I also struggle
with rage against bad haiku.
And I'm the problem!
Haiku #62134, by Rage Against the Bad Haiku Machine
February 11, 2019 8:06 am ET

Popping big pimples
First job flipping grease burgers humping everything
Haiku #62133, by Roger Daltrey of Talking bout my macular degeneration
February 11, 2019 3:57 am ET

No time for kissing
Texts to text. Facebook to check have a emoji
Haiku #62132, by Man whom married a pillowcase of Bedroom
February 11, 2019 3:53 am ET

She kissed my cheek
Then ran out to my old car
Said, "I am sorry."

"Sorry I did that"
Even a friendly cheek peck
Is verboten now.

I thought to myself
even the women are scared
of harmless friendship

PC destruction
Of human interaction
will come back to you.
Haiku #62131, by Revolted Counter Revolutionary of Moscow Idaho
February 11, 2019 1:58 am ET

When the world blows up
I hope we hear Dr Ruth
Moaning in climax
Haiku #62130, by A wish of Earth
February 11, 2019 12:08 am ET

i fucking hate the
times i get pissed off over
stuff posted on this

site, i think do i
need to out do the worthless
70 year old math teacher

who should be dead by
now or might die in 2 or 3
years if i dont give

a shit anymore, pent
up Satanic feelings hiding
behind a xtian

veneer, then burst out
anger retires, a few harsh words
then silence, what then?
Haiku #62129, by vhs
February 10, 2019 11:46 pm ET

and while youre at it
nephew, bend like it
that way for, daddy huh?

is daddy a crip and you a blood?
Haiku #62128, by vhs
February 10, 2019 11:26 pm ET

hmm, go fuck yourself Inglewood
Go back to jerking off to
pictures of Crips sucking my dick
Haiku #62127, by vhs
February 10, 2019 11:24 pm ET

Radio talk show
Haiku poets with big dinks
The show was cancelled
Haiku #62126, by Anonymous Poet
February 10, 2019 10:44 pm ET

His girlfriend complained,
like his haiku, he seldom
finished her either.
Haiku #62125, by Dr. Ruth Westheimer
February 10, 2019 10:43 pm ET

Stigmata stigma
'stigmatism orgasm.
Pardon my bad aim.
Haiku #62124, by blind porn star of hold me cane while I fuck these bitches
February 10, 2019 10:38 pm ET

Haiku #62123, by Job coach of Ramrod dept
February 10, 2019 10:35 pm ET

Tell us the story
when your ass got eaten out
by a bunch of Crips.
Haiku #62122, by vhs' nephew of Inglewood, CA
February 10, 2019 10:34 pm ET

Do you like robots?
I mean the really BIG ones.
Fully functional.
Haiku #62121, by Starkitten of Pacific Rim Job
February 10, 2019 10:29 pm ET

perhaps perhaps not
i have stories to write and
maybe i just will
Haiku #62120, by vhs
February 10, 2019 9:10 pm ET

I don't bleed down there
But I've got the stigmata
Why I wear glasses
Haiku #62119, by Noticer of Details of Optometrists rose colored glasses with clots
February 10, 2019 7:57 pm ET

Darth and Starkitten
See, they are different poets
I enjoy their work
Haiku #62118, by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
February 10, 2019 7:53 pm ET

Haiku #62117, by Anonymous Poet
February 10, 2019 7:15 pm ET

Will you eat my twat.
And not just some, but a lot.
Never mind the clot.
Haiku #62116, by Anonymous Poet
February 10, 2019 6:29 pm ET

Looks like Darth's been here.
Sure smells like he visited...
Watch what you step in.
Haiku #62115, by Cybernetic Latrine of Virtual Olfactory
February 10, 2019 6:24 pm ET

Order in the court!
Fish Delight and Hamberders
Don't judge my taste buds
Haiku #62114, by Don the Con of Lobby Hotel Graybar
February 10, 2019 6:14 pm ET

Cleaning dust bunnies
Never expected to find
Stranger under bed
Haiku #62113, by OCD of Dust ruffle
February 10, 2019 5:36 pm ET

Add spice to your lives
Surprise the family right now
Tom Cruise undies dance
Haiku #62112, by Your living room of Socks tightywhites
February 10, 2019 2:55 pm ET

When you jump the broom
Marriage can be like a vacuum
Let in some fresh air
Haiku #62111, by Primal Scream of Crack under door
February 10, 2019 2:53 pm ET

when my family
assumes the vacuum is more
important than my

life, its time to leave
them alone and contemplate
money versus life

things versus items
Haiku #62110, by vhs
February 10, 2019 12:00 pm ET

i dont dare post stuff
on here, it just keeps going
and going and go...
Haiku #62109, by SPC 113
February 10, 2019 11:05 am ET

Perhaps,ask yourself
Why you have to get so close
To the Grizzly bear
Haiku #62108, by Selfie of 2die4
February 10, 2019 3:27 am ET

An awkward silence
Judicious release of wind
Now we're all smiling
Haiku #62107, by How to wind friends and flatulence people of Apex of Fart
February 10, 2019 1:54 am ET

In the tall green grass
Masturbating Leprechaun
Hung like a stallion
Haiku #62106, by Irish Eyes of Smiing
February 10, 2019 1:50 am ET

Rummage Sale scream
Huge dildo in the free box
Life is wonderful
Haiku #62105, by Bargain Hunter
February 10, 2019 1:46 am ET

Remember those times
You wish you stayed home longer
And used the toilet
Haiku #62104, by Tell tale brown stain of Pants
February 10, 2019 1:43 am ET

He snuck in the zoo
To cuddle rhinos. No sex.
Saved it for the sloth
Haiku #62103, by Slow hand of You look wonderful tonight
February 9, 2019 11:12 pm ET

Hey, is that you God?
Didn't picture you like that
How come your dink's small?
Haiku #62102, by Get with the program
February 9, 2019 9:01 pm ET

Go smote thyself now.
All you talk about is shit.
And women's organs...
Haiku #62101, by Sure as Hell Deserve Get Smote
February 9, 2019 8:51 pm ET

Spunk a doodle doo
My red rooster jizzed on you
Colonel Sanders too
Haiku #62100, by Bawkbbawk begahhhhhh
February 9, 2019 8:47 pm ET

Talking to myself
Billy's Idol high five me
Tap shuffle tap tap
Haiku #62099, by Kool of Person
February 9, 2019 8:45 pm ET

Al Gore got rhythm
Dancing to devil music
Eating out Tipper
Haiku #62098, by Noticed of details
February 9, 2019 8:44 pm ET

Get smote in real time
Virtual Reality
Biblical version
Haiku #62097, by Smote Avoider
February 9, 2019 8:41 pm ET

Yeah, I've got rhythm
Tap dancing on your sidewalk
I will never stop
Haiku #62096, by Al G O'Rhythm
February 9, 2019 8:39 pm ET

Just gave birth to twins
Named them Mortar and Pestle
My bad, t'was kaka
Haiku #62095, by Regular of Boom boom room
February 9, 2019 8:36 pm ET

Took a shine to you
Even your round pizza face
Your hot anchovy
Haiku #62094, by Not Bon Jovi of New Grimicey (formerly known as New Jersey)
February 9, 2019 8:29 pm ET

Sleight of hand job trick
Kiss rabbit between the ears
Boner levitates
Haiku #62093, by Magic of Hat
February 9, 2019 8:11 pm ET

if i can get some
people from twitter to say twit
here, give us the bird?
Haiku #62092, by vhs
February 9, 2019 6:47 pm ET

Robots make Haiku?
This modern world is hellish.
Nothing is sacred

Vast emptiness
And nothing is holy here
That's what Damo said.

Of course he was right
hells- empty, devils roam earth.
With robot back up
Haiku #62091, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
February 9, 2019 6:47 pm ET

Garbage disposal
Tiresome penis
Haiku #62090, by Dispose-All of That's what it says
February 9, 2019 5:11 pm ET

Zip line getaway
Chased by hungry cannibals
They want my innards

Gizzard off limits
Hands off my sweet meat, Losers!!
Go make a salad
Haiku #62089, by Gizzardkeeper
February 9, 2019 5:07 pm ET