BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
22 Years
307 Days
and
65938 Haikus
later...
Add spice to your lives
Surprise the family right now
Tom Cruise undies dance
Haiku #62112, by Your living room of Socks tightywhites
February 10, 2019 2:55 pm ET

When you jump the broom
Marriage can be like a vacuum
Let in some fresh air
Haiku #62111, by Primal Scream of Crack under door
February 10, 2019 2:53 pm ET

when my family
assumes the vacuum is more
important than my

life, its time to leave
them alone and contemplate
money versus life

things versus items
Haiku #62110, by vhs
February 10, 2019 12:00 pm ET

i dont dare post stuff
on here, it just keeps going
and going and go...
Haiku #62109, by SPC 113
February 10, 2019 11:05 am ET

Perhaps,ask yourself
Why you have to get so close
To the Grizzly bear
Haiku #62108, by Selfie of 2die4
February 10, 2019 3:27 am ET

An awkward silence
Judicious release of wind
Now we're all smiling
Haiku #62107, by How to wind friends and flatulence people of Apex of Fart
February 10, 2019 1:54 am ET

In the tall green grass
Masturbating Leprechaun
Hung like a stallion
Haiku #62106, by Irish Eyes of Smiing
February 10, 2019 1:50 am ET

Rummage Sale scream
Huge dildo in the free box
Life is wonderful
Haiku #62105, by Bargain Hunter
February 10, 2019 1:46 am ET

Remember those times
You wish you stayed home longer
And used the toilet
Haiku #62104, by Tell tale brown stain of Pants
February 10, 2019 1:43 am ET

He snuck in the zoo
To cuddle rhinos. No sex.
Saved it for the sloth
Haiku #62103, by Slow hand of You look wonderful tonight
February 9, 2019 11:12 pm ET

Hey, is that you God?
Didn't picture you like that
How come your dink's small?
Haiku #62102, by Get with the program
February 9, 2019 9:01 pm ET

Go smote thyself now.
All you talk about is shit.
And women's organs...
Haiku #62101, by Sure as Hell Deserve Get Smote
February 9, 2019 8:51 pm ET

Spunk a doodle doo
My red rooster jizzed on you
Colonel Sanders too
Haiku #62100, by Bawkbbawk begahhhhhh
February 9, 2019 8:47 pm ET

Talking to myself
Billy's Idol high five me
Tap shuffle tap tap
Haiku #62099, by Kool of Person
February 9, 2019 8:45 pm ET

Al Gore got rhythm
Dancing to devil music
Eating out Tipper
Haiku #62098, by Noticed of details
February 9, 2019 8:44 pm ET

Get smote in real time
Virtual Reality
Biblical version
Haiku #62097, by Smote Avoider
February 9, 2019 8:41 pm ET

Yeah, I've got rhythm
Tap dancing on your sidewalk
I will never stop
Haiku #62096, by Al G O'Rhythm
February 9, 2019 8:39 pm ET

Just gave birth to twins
Named them Mortar and Pestle
My bad, t'was kaka
Haiku #62095, by Regular of Boom boom room
February 9, 2019 8:36 pm ET

Took a shine to you
Even your round pizza face
Your hot anchovy
Haiku #62094, by Not Bon Jovi of New Grimicey (formerly known as New Jersey)
February 9, 2019 8:29 pm ET

Sleight of hand job trick
Kiss rabbit between the ears
Boner levitates
Haiku #62093, by Magic of Hat
February 9, 2019 8:11 pm ET

if i can get some
people from twitter to say twit
here, give us the bird?
Haiku #62092, by vhs
February 9, 2019 6:47 pm ET

Robots make Haiku?
This modern world is hellish.
Nothing is sacred

Vast emptiness
And nothing is holy here
That's what Damo said.

Of course he was right
hells- empty, devils roam earth.
With robot back up
Haiku #62091, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
February 9, 2019 6:47 pm ET

Garbage disposal
Gnarlygrabgobgobbling
Tiresome penis
Haiku #62090, by Dispose-All of That's what it says
February 9, 2019 5:11 pm ET

Zip line getaway
Chased by hungry cannibals
They want my innards

Gizzard off limits
Hands off my sweet meat, Losers!!
Go make a salad
Haiku #62089, by Gizzardkeeper
February 9, 2019 5:07 pm ET

Automatically
Lubricate the syllables
With each new poem
Haiku #62088, by Robot Grease
February 9, 2019 1:49 pm ET

We know what you are:
A.I. haiku algorithm.
Because your names SUCK
Haiku #62087, by Name of a Human Soul so FUCK A.I.
February 9, 2019 1:45 pm ET

Blurry, spinning dizzy
Fingers stuck in bowling ball
Former severed head
Haiku #62086, by Life Hacks of Pinterest
February 9, 2019 11:44 am ET

Sin. Repent. Sin. Sin.
Repent. Sin. Sin..Now the horns!
It was Sin Sin Sin!
Haiku #62085, by R U Dancing? of R U asking?
February 9, 2019 11:39 am ET

Organic Christmas
Gave the wife a cucumber
She find new pickle
Haiku #62084, by Holidaze
February 9, 2019 11:33 am ET

Tested on horses
Song stylings of Hall and Oates
Steaming road apples
Haiku #62083, by Sara of Vertigo Smile
February 9, 2019 11:29 am ET

Yurt of tunafish
I think you know what I mean
Feels like home to me
Haiku #62082, by Cushion pusher of Third World
February 9, 2019 3:41 am ET

The food bank you robbed
Frostbitten gonads for you
Move on, Steakstealer
Haiku #62081, by Waddling of Chafed
February 9, 2019 3:38 am ET

Art Garfunkel
Haiku #62080, by Witchy of Edie Brickell
February 9, 2019 3:31 am ET

Speak in a false voice
And when they call for a priest
Spit up thick pea soup
Haiku #62079, by Run of Like Hell
February 9, 2019 3:24 am ET

Recite it aloud
Then face the consequences
Blame it on haiku
Haiku #62078, by Not afraid of Poetry
February 9, 2019 3:23 am ET

Poetry Robot
Hello, how are you today?
Ejaculates grease
Haiku #62077, by The Future of Running The other way
February 9, 2019 3:21 am ET

Sucking down crab legs
Gyrations and mad air humps
Did I catch your eye?
Haiku #62076, by Maniac of On the floor
February 9, 2019 3:18 am ET

Peppermint ding dong
Satisfying sensation
Freshen lower breath
Haiku #62075, by The fresh maker
February 9, 2019 3:16 am ET

Never mind the coal
I
Haiku #62074, by Santa of Workshopping eager beaver via morning wood
February 9, 2019 3:14 am ET

To DF: some coal
Put it under some pressure
Voila diamonds
Haiku #62073, by Off Season Santa of forward all replies to north pole
February 9, 2019 3:09 am ET

Grandpa
Haiku #62072, by Geezer
February 9, 2019 3:03 am ET

Commando Nation
Pull your pants out of your ass
They get sucked in there
Haiku #62071, by Age old problem
February 9, 2019 2:59 am ET

I do remember
Caturday nights high on nip
How many lives ago?
Haiku #62070, by Familiar of Old haunt
February 9, 2019 2:54 am ET

Where my sheep at yo?
Have ewe seen any of them?
Wolves slither snakes howl
Haiku #62069, by Shepherd of Field
February 9, 2019 2:50 am ET

Migrating mountain
Voiceless song as echoes pass
Moon shines over here
Haiku #62068, by human 4
February 9, 2019 2:48 am ET

Rubbing against you
To leave my scent on your leg
You remember me
Haiku #62067, by human 3
February 9, 2019 2:46 am ET

Sometimes I don't think
Then I think about just that
Sometimes I do think
Haiku #62066, by human 1
February 9, 2019 2:45 am ET

But we are alike
We breathe air and eat and stuff
We can both exist
Haiku #62065, by human 2
February 9, 2019 2:44 am ET

I resent that fact
I am more human than you
I am number 1
Haiku #62064, by human 1
February 9, 2019 2:43 am ET

Well hello human
I am also a human
So much in common
Haiku #62063, by human 2
February 9, 2019 2:42 am ET