Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
25 Years, 14 Days and 73939 Haikus later...

it works for me my
friend,tis a postcard from a
time long past indeed
Haiku # 59786, September 28, 2018 10:29 pm ET
by vhs
Dreaming yellow light
And pulling me through the glass
Away into sky
Haiku # 59785, September 28, 2018 9:12 pm ET
We could riff on the horror of mortality
And how it turns some into monsters
But all I want to do right now
Is straighten out the websites banner
It's crooked - too much for me to bear
Haiku # 59784, September 28, 2018 9:08 pm ET
by Sparklepony, MD
C'mon hop to it
Rustle me up some grub, hon
Pork Chops, Applesauce
Haiku # 59783, September 28, 2018 9:07 pm ET
by Brady Kids of Living Abortions
Up in the Heavens
Beyond poo flinging monkeys
Cunnilingus, Harps
Haiku # 59782, September 28, 2018 9:04 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
it is dead flesh with
so many lost memories and
unspoken departures

from places once full
of empty promise yet torn
down, novelty done
Haiku # 59781, September 28, 2018 8:23 pm ET
by vhs
usual reaction
has heart attack irl
people here post

sarcastic poems
no response, four weeks that guy
keeps posting himself

over...and over
Haiku # 59780, September 28, 2018 7:52 pm ET
by vhs of what if one of us is dead
cyberpenis, the
transhuman fuck machine of
the coming aeon
Haiku # 59779, September 28, 2018 7:48 pm ET
by vhs
Cut off all of them
All new Penis Guillotine
Many problems solved
Haiku # 59778, September 28, 2018 5:23 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Vile and amoral
Profiting from abortion:
Democrats today
Haiku # 59777, September 28, 2018 5:17 pm ET
by the way you deny the Word of God proves that you are DAMNED
Just how many times
Can a person have shingles?
At least four so far
Haiku # 59776, September 28, 2018 5:06 pm ET
by Itching and scratching I make matters worse
Intricate Folding
Genital Origami
Relaxing Hobby
Haiku # 59775, September 28, 2018 4:40 pm ET
by The time you read this, Gwynneth Paltrow will have laid six golden eggs of Goop
Smiling Golden Girls
Sliding down the banister
Senior Sybian
Haiku # 59774, September 28, 2018 2:56 pm ET
by Bea Arthur's stunt double
Confuse the deli
Order hairless bologna
One pound shaved thin, please
Haiku # 59773, September 28, 2018 2:48 pm ET
by Mystery Shopper of Lost in the Supermarket
Free Wangdoodle Ride
Every Thoreauback Thursday
At World of Walden
Haiku # 59772, September 28, 2018 2:43 pm ET
by Hank Dave
Labia Display
Autumn Headstand Festival
Ripe for the Harvest
Haiku # 59771, September 28, 2018 2:36 pm ET
by GuoJing of Terraced Acres of Clams of In the thick of it
From the Floating World
She corrects my gaijin views:
My Japanese muse
Haiku # 59770, September 28, 2018 11:53 am ET
by floating, one ponders the disadvantages of sinking
Lord, please intervene
In U.S. affairs of state
and in bad Haiku
Haiku # 59769, September 28, 2018 11:44 am ET
by postponing divine intervention, the wrath of Almighty God gathers intensity
I gave myself drugs
And passed out on my sofa,
Then gang-raped myself.
Haiku # 59768, September 28, 2018 11:29 am ET
by Evil Mentor of the Supreme Apointee
That Japanese muse;
She hides the inspiration
In her Haiku-slot
Haiku # 59767, September 28, 2018 11:22 am ET
by the old bridge of Nakamura tea-garden at dusk
My freaking Jap muse:
Kimono-clad, pale white face
Playing Sha mi sen
Haiku # 59766, September 28, 2018 11:01 am ET
by the murmuring spring waters of Nakamura Prefecture
Lesbian daleks
Can never know this pleasure:
being a straight man.
Haiku # 59765, September 28, 2018 10:38 am ET
by Unplug the projected reality of the Matrix AND her vibrator
Unh, unh, oh baby...
Wait, move your leg over here--
Oh yes...POETRY
Haiku # 59764, September 28, 2018 10:33 am ET
by sublimating your carnal desire you are assured of sexy inspiration from your muse
Go on, slap me, bitch.
That was ME with Heidi Klum.
Not Judge Kavanaugh.
Haiku # 59763, September 28, 2018 10:27 am ET
by Supermodels are in awe of my male prowess, for I am their judge
Some one take me quick
to Haiku Anonymous.
I'm on a bender...
Haiku # 59762, September 28, 2018 10:16 am ET
by vomiting verse in the halls of the Poetry Clinic
Were I the Doctor
I sure would have examined
The lovely Leela
Haiku # 59761, September 28, 2018 10:13 am ET
by signing my waiver, you are absolved of all rights to question my expertise
The Tardis: it was
complex Tantric metaphor
Leela as consort (?)
Haiku # 59760, September 28, 2018 10:08 am ET
by , next to, above, around, inside, along, all prepositions of place
Now I tell my kids
"Dr. Who was a great show
with old-school effects."
Haiku # 59759, September 28, 2018 10:02 am ET
by Who What Where When of How
i dunno, the fem
doc, so many guys going
eww...but i will watch

Haiku # 59758, September 28, 2018 9:03 am ET
by vhs
my you have a long
scarf...would you like a jelly
baby? boy would i
Haiku # 59757, September 28, 2018 8:26 am ET
by vhs of it is bigger on the inside
They say Tom was gay,
though he had the best women.
years later: who knew?
Haiku # 59756, September 28, 2018 8:08 am ET
by the good doctor's side, beware of Leela's savage beauty
Tomb of Rasselam:
recalling fragments of that
weird Who episode
Haiku # 59755, September 28, 2018 8:04 am ET
by of by of by by of by of BUY NOW
That freaking Leela
always got me excited.
She was the Doctor's
Haiku # 59754, September 28, 2018 8:01 am ET
by the melody of the theme, we knew it was Who
you you you are are
an oppresssss.....orrrrr musst ...deee...stroooyyy
maaaleeee wwwhhhittteee...cis gen...dooor...

Haiku # 59753, September 28, 2018 3:49 am ET
by lesbian daleks of the world of as presented by vhs
these people were
programmed programmed malfunction
must must
Haiku # 59752, September 28, 2018 3:47 am ET
by vhs
interner molochs
devour our children as
sacrifice, burning
Haiku # 59751, September 28, 2018 3:45 am ET
by vhs
defiant leftist
destroys her oponent, then
turns her hate within
Haiku # 59750, September 28, 2018 3:44 am ET
by vhs
malfunction at night
low does of blue light grounded
rest is all we need
Haiku # 59749, September 28, 2018 3:43 am ET
by vhs
the world still spins till
the last day when it all ends
we are as dust mites
Haiku # 59748, September 28, 2018 3:42 am ET
by vhs
Actually, my friend
I just checked my underpants
We had relations
Haiku # 59747, September 28, 2018 1:39 am ET
by Surprised of But not as surprised as you
My haiku brushes
Against yours - now your haikus
Smell like my haikus
Haiku # 59746, September 28, 2018 12:21 am ET
by Lion Some Day
I've checked the records
One similar incident
Involved Heidi Klum
Haiku # 59745, September 27, 2018 11:21 pm ET
by Bitchslap Watch of 1-800-BITCHSLAP
Some guy in New Zealand
Bitchslapped with an octopus
By a freaking seal
Haiku # 59744, September 27, 2018 11:18 pm ET
by Bitchslap Watch of 1-800-BITCHSLAP
How about this group?
The Beatles and their spouses
What would you call it?
Haiku # 59743, September 27, 2018 10:54 pm ET
by Octopus' Garden?
Agnetha Faltskog:
your voice combats this bad world.
ABBA unto death!
Haiku # 59742, September 27, 2018 10:05 pm ET
by Annifrid, Bjorn, Benny and Agnetha of the 1970's
They must be dwarves then
I counted seven hards on
They were garden gnomes
Haiku # 59741, September 27, 2018 9:20 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
you mean the guy from
game of thrones there the cool
midget guy right there???

no midgets are cool
Haiku # 59740, September 27, 2018 9:13 pm ET
by vhs
We have all been raped
By TV and internet
And horny midgets
Haiku # 59739, September 27, 2018 9:07 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I'm fucking tired
of these victim people on
tv coming out and

saying he raped me
then getting their accused killed
and getting tv contracts
Haiku # 59738, September 27, 2018 8:51 pm ET
by vhs
i may be someone
who gos through trials now but will
see what happens next
Haiku # 59737, September 27, 2018 8:25 pm ET
by vhs
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