BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
23 Years
5 Days
and
66434 Haikus
later...
Wide, innocent sighs
dreams and nightmares fall for you
like lovers in time
Haiku #55904, by Robin Goodfellow
January 10, 2017 3:43 pm ET

i might argue that
Rapture is a song by Blondie
Fab Five Freddy...
Haiku #55903, by vhs
January 10, 2017 1:27 pm ET

When dogs rule the world
We will greet one another
With much butt sniffing
Haiku #55902, by Renowned Futurist
January 10, 2017 9:01 am ET

Christ, I need coffee.
Fuck all this poetry shit.
The drug is calling.
Haiku #55901, by
January 9, 2017 9:01 pm ET

The rapture happened.
Only three people arose.
We are what is left.
Haiku #55900, by of
January 9, 2017 8:57 pm ET

the old stand bys stand
obliterated by the
passage of passing
Haiku #55899, by vhs
January 9, 2017 11:56 am ET

Of philosophies
dead branches of withered nights;
rotting memories
Haiku #55898, by Robin Goodfellow
January 9, 2017 11:23 am ET

Hello!
Haiku #55897, by opyyouuw of USA
January 9, 2017 4:11 am ET

Elegies from hymnals
grace in nightingale cages;
songs for a loved one
Haiku #55896, by Robin Goodfellow
January 8, 2017 4:25 pm ET

when the Rapture comes
along and the seven year
period passes

will the bad haiku
still be here, a testament
to all gone before?
Haiku #55895, by vhs of of course i am skeptical
January 8, 2017 10:48 am ET

Write an acronym
Of your name or else you will
Explode XD lol
Haiku #55894, by Meme
January 8, 2017 8:00 am ET

Do not eat pink snow
It will make you very sick
Learned that the hard way
Haiku #55893, by Adorable Kittens
January 8, 2017 3:19 am ET

Don't eat golden ice.
It's golden retriever pee.
My grandma told me.
Haiku #55892, by
January 7, 2017 5:41 pm ET

Drops of golden ice
Helpless in withered flowers
Silver streams of silent dreams
Haiku #55891, by Robin Goodfellow
January 7, 2017 12:48 pm ET

My haiku are great.
You're gonna love my haiku.
They're gonna be yuge!
Haiku #55890, by Donald Trump of Almost in the White House
January 7, 2017 5:04 am ET

Donald Trump should post
his tweets here on this website
in haiku format.
Haiku #55889, by Heil Cheeto!
January 7, 2017 5:01 am ET

We should go to war.
Most of China would love to see
a new government.
Haiku #55888, by Anonymous Poet
January 7, 2017 4:58 am ET

Yeah, yeah! CRT.
Send money now, fartknockers!
I'll buy some nachos.

And maybe TP.
And burritos and nachos!
Send money, bungholes.

Bow down before The
Almighty Bungholio.
And send that money.
Haiku #55887, by Cornholio of Lake Titicaca
January 7, 2017 4:55 am ET

China has got shit.
Poverty, pollution, smog.
Plastic cheap garbage.

Their rich vacation
in non-polluted countries,
scheming to buy land.

And turn those countries
into Chinese colonies,
filthy polluted shit holes just like China has become!
Haiku #55886, by Anonymous Poet
January 7, 2017 4:43 am ET

We should be buddies.
China has toxic whoop ass,
plus lots of people
Haiku #55885, by Russian Diplomat of Abouttobeexpelledistan
January 7, 2017 1:20 am ET

Silver lullabies
with warm candlelight nearby
for Earth's clockwork night
Haiku #55884, by Robin Goodfellow
January 6, 2017 10:41 am ET

would the first church of
beavis and butthead be a
legal religion

where people watch vids
on a CRT TV
and say "this sucks..." or

"woah that's cool...." oh how
they have forgotten what sucks
and what is cool now
Haiku #55883, by vhs
January 6, 2017 10:33 am ET

Believe in Beavis.
First Church of Cornholio.
Offers of TP.

Do you have TP?
Or do you have no TP?
We have no bunghole.

Anoint your bunghole
with oleo and TP.
Yeah, that would be cool.
Haiku #55882, by First Church of Cornholio the Great.
January 5, 2017 11:06 pm ET

Weeping o'er the dark
Black Oceans caress the pain
of a loved one lost
Haiku #55881, by Robin Goodfellow
January 5, 2017 1:17 pm ET

i wonder who came
up with the idea art needs
a liscense, status?
Haiku #55880, by vhs
January 5, 2017 1:07 pm ET

It's the ninja code.
Japaneseish or something.
Look at the post card!

Go eat your sushi!
Family Feudalism
without wasabi.

I need to get my
artistic license renewed
or pay the large fine.
Haiku #55879, by df
January 4, 2017 10:26 pm ET

I'm sorry you feel that way, what i read here i find rather disturbing, quite disturbing, not the sex doll thing so much but the devaluing of life
Haiku #55878, by vhs
January 4, 2017 11:35 am ET

There once was a man from Nantookit
who took out his dick and shook it
at everyone that he saw
although against the law
for a toothpick they mistook it.
Haiku #55877, by
January 3, 2017 7:50 pm ET

Electrophiles
are freaks who love electrons.
The chem teacher lied.
Haiku #55876, by
January 3, 2017 7:47 pm ET

When I was little and I had no sense
I too a piss on the electric fence.
It shocked my dick, it shocked my balls,
I took a shit in my overalls.
Haiku #55875, by
January 3, 2017 7:45 pm ET

Murder is an art.
Those who do it in hatred
are barbaric scum.
Haiku #55874, by Darth Figpucker
January 2, 2017 11:18 pm ET

I just ordered a
Hello Kitty sex doll from
Amazon dot com.
Haiku #55873, by Darth Figpucker
January 2, 2017 11:15 pm ET

I hate the way that
Asians take pics of their food
before they eat it.
Haiku #55872, by Darth Figpucker of The most disgusting CR (restroom) in the Philippines.
January 2, 2017 11:12 pm ET

Drugs can do good things.
Amphetamine-dried nostrils.
Pluck out those nose hairs.
Haiku #55871, by Nad Nostril and His Nine Nasty Nose-Pickers playing "I'll Get You Yet, You Booger." Pick it, boys!
January 2, 2017 11:08 pm ET

To chop off your head,
recording the slice and thud,
would make me happy.
Haiku #55870, by Samurai Jack Daniels of Population Control
January 2, 2017 11:03 pm ET

To come undone once
by your sweet melodic laugh
while time marches on
Haiku #55869, by Robin Goodfellow of Dallas, Texas
January 2, 2017 3:30 pm ET

duality is
one gravitational wave
this just will not do
Haiku #55868, by mundane
January 2, 2017 12:35 pm ET

one has tried to make
religions of science
we got sci fi

instead
Haiku #55867, by vhs of re: episode of futurama about star trek
January 2, 2017 11:08 am ET

in the end it fails
the promise becomes weighty
moral bankruptcy wins
Haiku #55866, by Sabu of Melbourne
January 2, 2017 6:42 am ET

When I dream I fly
Not because I flap my arms
But cuz I want to
Haiku #55865, by Forskolin of USA
January 2, 2017 6:28 am ET

Oh fuck, I give up.
Reading, watching, begging you
Cowards be ye all
Haiku #55864, by Mandorable Kitbola of South Colorola
January 2, 2017 2:26 am ET

Science in my pants.
Usually makes me dance.
Payday cash advance
Haiku #55863, by Adorable Kittens
January 1, 2017 11:12 pm ET

the facts are the facts
science will soon rule supreme
if we like, or not
Haiku #55862, by Mandingo Ebola
January 1, 2017 9:51 pm ET

yes electron clouds
we can never truly know
where they just might be

we can only make a
rough guess via science and
speculation ok...

I was just trying to sound smart at the last line there...
Haiku #55861, by vhs
January 1, 2017 9:08 pm ET

an electron dream
from any point to the edge
it must be twisted
Haiku #55860, by mundane
January 1, 2017 2:02 pm ET

death brings life and death
happens over and over
till the cycle ends

Happy New Year
Haiku #55859, by vhs
January 1, 2017 1:22 pm ET

this dream catcher feat
directs a new year outward
will design bring forth
Haiku #55858, by mundane
January 1, 2017 12:59 pm ET

Hell-fuckin'-O! Motherfuckers!
Haiku #55857, by wixclypixwlbyt of Mace Windu's light saber was inscribed with Bad Motherfucker. Look it up.
December 31, 2016 9:01 pm ET

Dunkin Donuts coffee sucks, but hey, it's open.
Haiku #55856, by &
December 31, 2016 8:57 pm ET

The native women are overweight from eating too much processed cheese.
Christmas lights are choking the town square and likely will not be removed until after Valentines day.
Venereal diseases aren't really as bad as they tell you in high school.
I'm listening to tool and avoiding Facebook at the moment so you should be proud.
It's sad that Carrie went in such a horrible violent way, but I guess that's life.
Some Asian girls have big boobs. I enjoy telling them they have big boobs just to see what kind of reaction I get... "Hey, wow! You have big boobs!"
The mega-roman candles give you the best bang for your buck... Next to Eccentrica Gallumbits, that is.
Haiku #55855, by &
December 31, 2016 8:55 pm ET