Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 63 Days and 77460 Haiku later...

Roomates,oh the sex
desire it but oh the fun it
would have been not lost.
Haiku # 4127, August 31, 2000 4:59 pm ET
by Red
red, my ex roommate
never had sex together
i wonder why not
Haiku # 4126, August 31, 2000 4:55 pm ET
by Red
working on a car
need good ideas badly
do you have any
Haiku # 4125, August 31, 2000 4:54 pm ET
by Red
The oppressive heat
Watch nature's creatures suffer
Long live Central Air!
Haiku # 4124, August 31, 2000 3:25 pm ET
by Jason of Your Town, USA
Boss is a moron
Someone had to tell her that
Now, daytime t.v.
Haiku # 4123, August 31, 2000 2:07 pm ET
by Chellie of Florida
What have I eaten
To make the potty and I
Very close today?
Haiku # 4122, August 31, 2000 1:47 pm ET
by Lucylu of Kalamazoo
Went to your party
Horror! Aunt Flo has arrived!
Bitch ruined my dress
Haiku # 4121, August 31, 2000 11:34 am ET
by Chellie of Florida
Man this cd sucks
I loved it when I bought it
What was I thinking?
Haiku # 4120, August 31, 2000 11:20 am ET
by Chellie of Florida
This is my frist time
Writing a public haiku
Well, so far so good.
Haiku # 4119, August 31, 2000 11:17 am ET
by Chellie of Florida
piece of crap tab key
sitting there, mocking me and
my incomplete post
Haiku # 4118, August 31, 2000 9:14 am ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA
pullover sweatshirt
Haiku # 4117, August 31, 2000 9:11 am ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA
if she sells sea shells
by the seashore, then what would
she sell her clam for?
Haiku # 4116, August 31, 2000 9:08 am ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA
John Robert Crawford
Haikus so bad, they call him
Mr. Bad Haiku
Haiku # 4115, August 31, 2000 12:07 am ET
by Bryce


so i ignore her
and before long she's asleep
curled at my feet



Haiku # 4114, August 30, 2000 8:57 pm ET
by Simba's Beefteeth of Hogtown
she sees the cat treat
yet will not acknowledge it
for it is offered


Haiku # 4113, August 30, 2000 8:55 pm ET
by Simba's Beefteeth of Hogtown
from hedge past the Olds
the hyper 'Teeq' darts onto
the warm Festiva
Haiku # 4112, August 30, 2000 8:54 pm ET
by Simba's Beefteeth of Hogtown
Haiku # 4111, August 30, 2000 8:49 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
o bewitched feline
your tortoise shell conceals
your devilish heart
Haiku # 4110, August 30, 2000 8:40 pm ET
by Simba's Beefteeth of Hogtown
ode to a dear friend
Tequila you coy princess
how i miss your "purrrt"
Haiku # 4109, August 30, 2000 8:39 pm ET
by Simba's Beefteeth of Hogtown
ran 10K today
need a mike's hard lemonade
need to quench my thirst

Haiku # 4108, August 30, 2000 6:15 pm ET
by Monty Hall of Venice
I have a dark secret
It's small and round and pointy
But in a good way
Haiku # 4107, August 30, 2000 6:08 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
My high moral ground
Can make it quite difficult
To lick your finger
Haiku # 4106, August 30, 2000 6:07 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
Oh to be your hand
Now that summer is here
And you are shaven
Haiku # 4105, August 30, 2000 6:07 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
Hey mister dj
Play that funky beat once more
No, the other one
Haiku # 4104, August 30, 2000 6:07 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
The wheels on the bus
Go right round, baby, right round
Like crazy fuckers
Haiku # 4103, August 30, 2000 6:06 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
Take one green pepper
And a handful of bacon
If you really want
Haiku # 4102, August 30, 2000 6:06 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
The glorious boy!
See how he flexes his brain!
Like a squishy goo
Haiku # 4101, August 30, 2000 6:06 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
If you had twelve cats
And you put them in a row
Which would you eat first?
Haiku # 4100, August 30, 2000 6:05 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
All the church ladies
Are concealing their wedgies
That the vicar gave
Haiku # 4099, August 30, 2000 6:05 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
What's in your trousers?
They bulge ever so slightly
Have you lost a sock?
Haiku # 4098, August 30, 2000 6:04 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
DVD buyers
we must have you for dinner
upon our return
Haiku # 4097, August 30, 2000 4:01 pm ET
by Monty Hall of Venice
Little wife must check
with her six foot five husband
to buy DVD
Haiku # 4096, August 30, 2000 3:56 pm ET
by Monty Hall of Venice
Look.. the odd buttons
At the bottom of the screen
Now sort of make sense
Haiku # 4095, August 25, 2000 5:27 pm ET
by Janis of Culver City
the swarm approaches
stimpack! tank cannon fire!
the zergish horde dies...
Haiku # 4094, August 25, 2000 4:26 pm ET
by Guy Montag
survivor withdrawl
no more jenna, no colleen
subscribe to playboy
Haiku # 4093, August 25, 2000 4:17 pm ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA
eyes glued to the screen
Britney Spears dancing about
think I see nipple
Haiku # 4092, August 25, 2000 4:14 pm ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA
The voice of the kids
So loud, so choking... it makes
me act like i do
Haiku # 4091, August 25, 2000 3:29 pm ET
by Guy Montag
does any truth exist?
or is it all in our minds?
we can never know
Haiku # 4090, August 25, 2000 3:27 pm ET
by Guy Montag
Man I feel whacked out
Train of thought in slow motion
I need to get laid
Haiku # 4089, August 25, 2000 3:25 pm ET
by Guy Montag
i wonder if we can
still use html to
make our haikus nice
Haiku # 4088, August 25, 2000 3:23 pm ET
by Guy Montag
Don't dis this dick, bitch
don't throw it out the window
like Lorena did
Haiku # 4086, August 25, 2000 1:11 pm ET
by PlayDOG of Boston
lazy lesbian
fat fingers means that she is
a well hung biatch
Haiku # 4085, August 25, 2000 1:06 pm ET
by Kackarott
cold calling sucks shit
most people are such assholes
I want to kill them
Haiku # 4084, August 25, 2000 11:58 am ET
by haakenzoob
fart and penis jokes
immature? perhaps, who cares
rather LOL
Haiku # 4083, August 25, 2000 11:19 am ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA
feeling insecure
longing to be repected
for thoughtful haiku
Haiku # 4082, August 25, 2000 11:12 am ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA
I don't want to see
You're pretentious arse-talking
Any more, thank you
Haiku # 4081, August 25, 2000 10:55 am ET
by Floatation Device
oh andi peters
i miss you and ed the duck
like i miss herpes

Haiku # 4080, August 25, 2000 10:53 am ET
by Floatation Device
you think i don't know
and if i'm honest who can
see another's heart?

but i'm the closest
you'll get to seeing
your whys and wherefores

wish i could show you
the sympathy you don't want
wish you'd let me in
Haiku # 4079, August 25, 2000 10:28 am ET
by sheena of yup, here
brother don't fall down
wish you could see how much i
wish i could be there

your lost horizon
where s/he'll walk the long young years
grieves me helplessly
Haiku # 4078, August 25, 2000 10:24 am ET
by sheena of yup, here
do you really want
to hurt me - do you really
want to make me cry...

Haiku everywhere
In the computer of life;
In bad 80s songs.
Haiku # 4077, August 25, 2000 10:22 am ET
by Janis of Santa Monica