Don't dis this dick, bitch
don't throw it out the window
like Lorena did

lazy lesbian
fat fingers means that she is
a well hung biatch

cold calling sucks shit
most people are such assholes
I want to kill them

fart and penis jokes
immature? perhaps, who cares
rather LOL

feeling insecure
longing to be repected
for thoughtful haiku

I don't want to see
You're pretentious arse-talking
Any more, thank you

oh andi peters
i miss you and ed the duck
like i miss herpes

you think i don't know
and if i'm honest who can
see another's heart?

but i'm the closest
you'll get to seeing
your whys and wherefores

wish i could show you
the sympathy you don't want
wish you'd let me in

brother don't fall down
wish you could see how much i
wish i could be there

your lost horizon
where s/he'll walk the long young years
grieves me helplessly

do you really want
to hurt me - do you really
want to make me cry...

Haiku everywhere
In the computer of life;
In bad 80s songs.

generosity
first last center core rind seeds
keep the jihad on

generosity
first last center core rind seeds
keep the jihad on

she looked at my nose
crap!...something must be hanging
stay calm...snif...sniiiifffff...wipe

Floccinaucini-
hilipilification
it's the longest word

If it wasn't for
Those voices inside my head
I'd feel all alone

They tell me secrets
Such as why delia smith
Uses limes so much

There's no fear on earth
Like that when you drop a log
Bigger than your cock

my vimto lolly
drip drop drips on my carpet
my arse is itchy

Girl in my bio class
All she talks about is sex
I turn away, scared

Scared that she, that men
will know my lust, and brand me
pervert! sicko! die!

Do I really have
problems? I do not know. nor
can anyone tell

when you think of it
it's hard to keep the rhythm
breathing in and out

Social problems are
forgotten when I use comp.
Do I run from them?

Nothing about which
to talk; she thinks I hate her.
but it's fear, not hate

So misunderstood!
or am I just that bad? that
they hate me? I'm boring.

Old Navy, AF
social status symbols. they
tear the people apart

Yup i'm a nutcase
I know this all too well. I
just want a true friend

I am misled by
the media. they tell me
what to think. i do

Three things thought about
in class: music, starcraft, sex
but i am deprived

please, leave me alone
quit following me around
and don't call either

I know how that goes
funny, they don't seem to mind
long as you're buying

a slack lower lip
does not necessarily
mean dick or no dick

I am so lonely
that I go to badhaiku
for company. sad

how much does it cost?
depends, how much do you have?
luckily, they match

twisting in the breeze
wrapped in spider web cocoon
the shell of a fly

I caress plastic
hand runs up to the fabric
i love my speakers!

take a look at this!
"Wow! how long is it?" she asked
wait, it also grows!

as per usual
my lost mother got more lost
lace of blood my heart

only had one dream
of my newly dead mother
she wore a red shirt

spit dribble crusting
can you hear the molecules
surrender moisture?

I once had this scar
A great tale...then it faded
How disappointing

Big dego crack stink
I shall give you a razor
free us from jungle

Focus / F.T.S.
Isn't that feminine spray?
No hot chicks allowed...

finger blasting broads
the juices are still flowing
my hand smells like fish

Compaq tests suck cock
84 percent? FUCK YOU!
I shit on keyboard...

skinny skinny pete
do not molest your housemates
who will pay the rent

snowblind haikuist
curses his resolution
to write more haiku

successive haiku
with chronology reversed
lose some coherence

Incoming freshman
How Delightfully nervous
They amuse me so

ach! i hate homework!
high school's down. but it's up is
very sexy girls

The Wizard of Oz
Great film. Those flying monkeys
Really shit me up

One hand on my mouse.
Whilst the other gently grips
My flacid member