Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 63 Days and 77460 Haiku later...

The oppressive heat
Watch nature's creatures suffer
Long live Central Air!
Haiku # 4124, August 31, 2000 3:25 pm ET
by Jason of Your Town, USA
Boss is a moron
Someone had to tell her that
Now, daytime t.v.
Haiku # 4123, August 31, 2000 2:07 pm ET
by Chellie of Florida
What have I eaten
To make the potty and I
Very close today?
Haiku # 4122, August 31, 2000 1:47 pm ET
by Lucylu of Kalamazoo
Went to your party
Horror! Aunt Flo has arrived!
Bitch ruined my dress
Haiku # 4121, August 31, 2000 11:34 am ET
by Chellie of Florida
Man this cd sucks
I loved it when I bought it
What was I thinking?
Haiku # 4120, August 31, 2000 11:20 am ET
by Chellie of Florida
This is my frist time
Writing a public haiku
Well, so far so good.
Haiku # 4119, August 31, 2000 11:17 am ET
by Chellie of Florida
piece of crap tab key
sitting there, mocking me and
my incomplete post
Haiku # 4118, August 31, 2000 9:14 am ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA
pullover sweatshirt
Haiku # 4117, August 31, 2000 9:11 am ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA
if she sells sea shells
by the seashore, then what would
she sell her clam for?
Haiku # 4116, August 31, 2000 9:08 am ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA
John Robert Crawford
Haikus so bad, they call him
Mr. Bad Haiku
Haiku # 4115, August 31, 2000 12:07 am ET
by Bryce


so i ignore her
and before long she's asleep
curled at my feet



Haiku # 4114, August 30, 2000 8:57 pm ET
by Simba's Beefteeth of Hogtown
she sees the cat treat
yet will not acknowledge it
for it is offered


Haiku # 4113, August 30, 2000 8:55 pm ET
by Simba's Beefteeth of Hogtown
from hedge past the Olds
the hyper 'Teeq' darts onto
the warm Festiva
Haiku # 4112, August 30, 2000 8:54 pm ET
by Simba's Beefteeth of Hogtown
Haiku # 4111, August 30, 2000 8:49 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
o bewitched feline
your tortoise shell conceals
your devilish heart
Haiku # 4110, August 30, 2000 8:40 pm ET
by Simba's Beefteeth of Hogtown
ode to a dear friend
Tequila you coy princess
how i miss your "purrrt"
Haiku # 4109, August 30, 2000 8:39 pm ET
by Simba's Beefteeth of Hogtown
ran 10K today
need a mike's hard lemonade
need to quench my thirst

Haiku # 4108, August 30, 2000 6:15 pm ET
by Monty Hall of Venice
I have a dark secret
It's small and round and pointy
But in a good way
Haiku # 4107, August 30, 2000 6:08 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
My high moral ground
Can make it quite difficult
To lick your finger
Haiku # 4106, August 30, 2000 6:07 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
Oh to be your hand
Now that summer is here
And you are shaven
Haiku # 4105, August 30, 2000 6:07 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
Hey mister dj
Play that funky beat once more
No, the other one
Haiku # 4104, August 30, 2000 6:07 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
The wheels on the bus
Go right round, baby, right round
Like crazy fuckers
Haiku # 4103, August 30, 2000 6:06 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
Take one green pepper
And a handful of bacon
If you really want
Haiku # 4102, August 30, 2000 6:06 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
The glorious boy!
See how he flexes his brain!
Like a squishy goo
Haiku # 4101, August 30, 2000 6:06 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
If you had twelve cats
And you put them in a row
Which would you eat first?
Haiku # 4100, August 30, 2000 6:05 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
All the church ladies
Are concealing their wedgies
That the vicar gave
Haiku # 4099, August 30, 2000 6:05 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
What's in your trousers?
They bulge ever so slightly
Have you lost a sock?
Haiku # 4098, August 30, 2000 6:04 pm ET
by Scrunty Device
DVD buyers
we must have you for dinner
upon our return
Haiku # 4097, August 30, 2000 4:01 pm ET
by Monty Hall of Venice
Little wife must check
with her six foot five husband
to buy DVD
Haiku # 4096, August 30, 2000 3:56 pm ET
by Monty Hall of Venice
Look.. the odd buttons
At the bottom of the screen
Now sort of make sense
Haiku # 4095, August 25, 2000 5:27 pm ET
by Janis of Culver City
the swarm approaches
stimpack! tank cannon fire!
the zergish horde dies...
Haiku # 4094, August 25, 2000 4:26 pm ET
by Guy Montag
survivor withdrawl
no more jenna, no colleen
subscribe to playboy
Haiku # 4093, August 25, 2000 4:17 pm ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA
eyes glued to the screen
Britney Spears dancing about
think I see nipple
Haiku # 4092, August 25, 2000 4:14 pm ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA
The voice of the kids
So loud, so choking... it makes
me act like i do
Haiku # 4091, August 25, 2000 3:29 pm ET
by Guy Montag
does any truth exist?
or is it all in our minds?
we can never know
Haiku # 4090, August 25, 2000 3:27 pm ET
by Guy Montag
Man I feel whacked out
Train of thought in slow motion
I need to get laid
Haiku # 4089, August 25, 2000 3:25 pm ET
by Guy Montag
i wonder if we can
still use html to
make our haikus nice
Haiku # 4088, August 25, 2000 3:23 pm ET
by Guy Montag
Don't dis this dick, bitch
don't throw it out the window
like Lorena did
Haiku # 4086, August 25, 2000 1:11 pm ET
by PlayDOG of Boston
lazy lesbian
fat fingers means that she is
a well hung biatch
Haiku # 4085, August 25, 2000 1:06 pm ET
by Kackarott
cold calling sucks shit
most people are such assholes
I want to kill them
Haiku # 4084, August 25, 2000 11:58 am ET
by haakenzoob
fart and penis jokes
immature? perhaps, who cares
rather LOL
Haiku # 4083, August 25, 2000 11:19 am ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA
feeling insecure
longing to be repected
for thoughtful haiku
Haiku # 4082, August 25, 2000 11:12 am ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA
I don't want to see
You're pretentious arse-talking
Any more, thank you
Haiku # 4081, August 25, 2000 10:55 am ET
by Floatation Device
oh andi peters
i miss you and ed the duck
like i miss herpes

Haiku # 4080, August 25, 2000 10:53 am ET
by Floatation Device
you think i don't know
and if i'm honest who can
see another's heart?

but i'm the closest
you'll get to seeing
your whys and wherefores

wish i could show you
the sympathy you don't want
wish you'd let me in
Haiku # 4079, August 25, 2000 10:28 am ET
by sheena of yup, here
brother don't fall down
wish you could see how much i
wish i could be there

your lost horizon
where s/he'll walk the long young years
grieves me helplessly
Haiku # 4078, August 25, 2000 10:24 am ET
by sheena of yup, here
do you really want
to hurt me - do you really
want to make me cry...

Haiku everywhere
In the computer of life;
In bad 80s songs.
Haiku # 4077, August 25, 2000 10:22 am ET
by Janis of Santa Monica
generosity
first last center core rind seeds
keep the jihad on
Haiku # 4076, August 25, 2000 10:17 am ET
by sheena of yup, here
generosity
first last center core rind seeds
keep the jihad on
Haiku # 4075, August 25, 2000 10:17 am ET
by sheena of yup, here
she looked at my nose
crap!...something must be hanging
stay calm...snif...sniiiifffff...wipe
Haiku # 4074, August 25, 2000 8:51 am ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA