Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 45 Days and 77437 Haiku later...

I had a yearning
To post a haiku on here
Now it's satisfied
Haiku # 32631, September 12, 2005 12:48 pm ET
by Jonathan
Tumescence be damned
Engorged penile tissue, ouch
Priapism's hard
Haiku # 32630, September 11, 2005 7:32 pm ET
by Maestro of Manhattan
differences between
they attract charged particles
yet repel people
Haiku # 32629, September 11, 2005 9:19 am ET
by ash
this life continues
much like many other lives
except more mucus
Haiku # 32628, September 11, 2005 9:10 am ET
by ash
I remember when
a dollar fifty seemed like
way too much for gas
Haiku # 32627, September 9, 2005 9:34 pm ET
by Exxon Mobile Tiger
Don't need no raise or
title Mr. Boss Man, just
them lime Otter Pops
Haiku # 32626, September 9, 2005 4:24 pm ET
by onjaysun of frogtown
i'm sick of coughing
but unless i stop breathing
it's more of the same
Haiku # 32625, September 9, 2005 9:29 am ET
by ash
I don't have a house
Next year I shall be homeless
But still a student
Haiku # 32624, September 8, 2005 5:55 pm ET
by A Student of Housing adverts
Kinda hits you like
a coconut to the head,
Gilligan be dead
Haiku # 32623, September 7, 2005 2:18 pm ET
by onjaysun of frogtown (miss ya little buddy)
Let's make fossil fuel
from some old admin fossils...
no gas shortage then.
Haiku # 32622, September 7, 2005 7:26 am ET
by Out of Gas Driver
Wanna fill me up,
for a fill-up, Phillip? The
Gas "Ho-in" begins
Haiku # 32621, September 6, 2005 3:48 pm ET
by onjaysun of frogtown
Johann Santana
One two three strikes you are out
That Beaner can pitch
Haiku # 32620, September 5, 2005 10:54 pm ET
by the monkey butler of Pittsburgh
bound to be shaken
no doctor no doctor no
take pussy galore
Haiku # 32619, September 5, 2005 2:42 am ET
by mellie
get shaken and stirred
beware of complex bondage
whilst being rogered
Haiku # 32618, September 5, 2005 1:51 am ET
by ash
Roger Moore may hide
inside the Kornflake box of
Konnery-but-Less
Haiku # 32617, September 4, 2005 5:47 pm ET
by Kornflake haiku revision from Klover
my boobs hurt... somewhere
it must be my period ~
Ghost of Hormone past [.]
Haiku # 32616, September 4, 2005 5:41 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Roger Moore made hide
inside the Kornflake box called:
Konnery-but-Less
Haiku # 32615, September 4, 2005 4:42 pm ET
by Klover of the o.c.
Beware applying
phenomenological
approaches in God
Haiku # 32614, September 4, 2005 1:37 pm ET
by Mort of Paris
Get back to the house
Let in by someone who should
Not be at home now
Haiku # 32612, September 4, 2005 10:09 am ET
by A Student of She said she was going to the Peak district
Wake up on a train
Why am I in Huddersfield?
I should be in Hull
Haiku # 32611, September 4, 2005 10:06 am ET
by A Student of Alcohol
new orleans ? yo, george !
as successful as iraq
but closer to home
Haiku # 32610, September 4, 2005 6:23 am ET
by ash
lymphomania
some say it's a gland problem
when cancer fucks you
Haiku # 32609, September 4, 2005 6:20 am ET
by ash
zero tolerance
three strikes and you are out Bush
shame shame shame end game
Haiku # 32608, September 4, 2005 3:46 am ET
by mellie
No, I'm not a heff-a-lump
Haiku # 32607, September 4, 2005 12:18 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Big ole heff-a-lump
Double bubble butt and chin.
Fatty fatty fuck.
Haiku # 32606, September 4, 2005 12:17 am ET
by heffa
Mina and Sunsi
The root of all that is wrong
With indoor plumbing
Haiku # 32605, September 4, 2005 12:16 am ET
by gotha_girl
Bald-ass, hairless fuck.
Chemo lovin' motha fuck.
Cancer is a bitch
Haiku # 32604, September 4, 2005 12:15 am ET
by lympho
I eat library paste
My cat's breath smells like cat food
Ralph Wiggum is God
Haiku # 32603, September 4, 2005 12:15 am ET
by Mina
Second Wind Fitness
Can Suck My Tiny white Dick
Save money my ass!
Haiku # 32602, September 4, 2005 12:12 am ET
by El Hefe
Awoke with a bone
Makes my pee-pee spray crooked.
Life is such a Bitch!
Haiku # 32601, September 4, 2005 12:10 am ET
by Gaffa_girl
She has to rewrite
Technology not her strength
Get the abacus
Haiku # 32600, September 4, 2005 12:10 am ET
by Joe Sixpack, Sr
Damn that chick of mine
Forces me to Perkins now
Coffee and french fries
Haiku # 32599, September 4, 2005 12:08 am ET
by Bob, the other white meat
Oh Digital God
Binary Lover of all Men
Super Cyber Sex
Haiku # 32598, September 4, 2005 12:06 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
a resurection
with no mary to wake me
bad haiku resumed
Haiku # 32597, September 3, 2005 4:58 pm ET
by ap of US
fuck you mcdonald's
salads dont come in a cup, damn
your dollar menu
Haiku # 32596, September 3, 2005 2:51 pm ET
by =) of Anywhere Usa
superdome nightmare
woke up to man on my roof
high pressure cleaning
Haiku # 32595, September 3, 2005 1:12 am ET
by mellie
People that work in
Highway reststops hate clean teeth
They like spacious rot
Haiku # 32594, September 2, 2005 10:26 pm ET
by Kackarott of somewhere in in Wisconsin
Haiku # 32593, September 2, 2005 9:25 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
think your job sucks, try
working at the New Orleans
Board of Tourism
Haiku # 32592, September 2, 2005 12:18 pm ET
by onjaysun of frogtown
hey ho uncle judd
it's no treat on bourbon street
mississippi blood
Haiku # 32591, September 2, 2005 10:01 am ET
by ash
surprise ! shock and awe !
who thought you could offer more ?
george, get off the floor

Haiku # 32590, September 2, 2005 9:40 am ET
by ash
wake up you dreamers
morning mr. president
it's time you were gone
Haiku # 32589, September 2, 2005 9:23 am ET
by ash
down at the levee
moreso than ever before
subversive nature
Haiku # 32588, September 2, 2005 9:22 am ET
by ash
Mississippi mud
is not a dessert this year
the gulf is just gone

Haiku # 32587, September 2, 2005 7:44 am ET
by theunseenundine
drowning in tears
beloved new orleans
we not be jazzin'
Haiku # 32586, September 2, 2005 12:09 am ET
by mellie
"Horse Sense"


If it wasn't for
my horse, I wouldn't of spent
that year in college


-- thanks to comedian Lewis Black for the inspiration for this haiku
Haiku # 32585, September 1, 2005 3:27 pm ET
by Crimson Mind -- "Horse Sense" of Phoenix, AZ

Concede consensus
Condescend cerulean
Cradled consciousness
Haiku # 32584, September 1, 2005 3:23 pm ET
by Crimson Mind -- "Untitled" of Phoenix, AZ
"Etiolate"


He had a pale face
etiolated from years
in dank, dark pool halls
Haiku # 32583, September 1, 2005 3:17 pm ET
by Crimson Mind -- "Etiolate" of Phoenix, AZ
"Stogy"


Poker with the boys.
Smelling like a bad stogy
Broke, I hitchhike home.
Haiku # 32582, September 1, 2005 3:14 pm ET
by Crimson Mind -- "Stogy" of Phoenix, AZ
"Incompetence"


Incompetence is
a level of Management
to which he aspires


-- inspired by Haiku #32577, by Bablets
Haiku # 32581, September 1, 2005 3:10 pm ET
by Crimson Mind -- "Incompetence"
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