Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 55 Days and 78007 Haiku later...
Stroking my long hair,
She turned to me and yelled out,
"I want you to leave!"
Haiku # 2782 December 19, 1999 10:39 am ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Inside my own skin
There is something to be said
About how I feel
Haiku # 2781 December 19, 1999 10:36 am ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Zero tolerance
Zero this and zero that
kamikazees rule
Haiku # 2780 December 18, 1999 6:01 pm ET
by Basho-matic
dipsomaniac
ba-humbugs infesting her
she deserves fruitcake
Haiku # 2779 December 18, 1999 3:48 pm ET
by Basho-matic
quite utterly stoked
here grinding out metaphors
i have found my niche
Haiku # 2778 December 18, 1999 3:42 pm ET
by Basho-matic
little white lies, no
never hurt the ones you love
send em U P S
Haiku # 2777 December 18, 1999 3:33 pm ET
by Basho-matic
Early morning stroll;
Winter constitutional:
My ears are quite cold.
Haiku # 2776 December 18, 1999 4:20 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
It''s not that I''m not
sympathetic, it''s just that
I really don''t care.
Haiku # 2775 December 17, 1999 1:13 pm ET
by hhtigerlily
Is it ignorance?
Is it apathy?
I don''t know and I don''t care.
Haiku # 2774 December 17, 1999 1:00 pm ET
by hhtigerlily
A Haiku has seventeen syllables.
Not no sixteen or eighteen.
Haiku # 2773 December 17, 1999 10:28 am ET
by farkel
Five, seven, five
The rhythm of the haiku
Five, seven, five
Haiku # 2772 December 17, 1999 9:47 am ET
by Spike
Tissue, once soggy
But now long since dry, adheres
Texturing the wall
Haiku # 2771 December 17, 1999 9:39 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
Sore, wet carpet burn
Brands your coccyx with a mark
That says ''Not Virgin''
Haiku # 2770 December 17, 1999 9:37 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
Brackish molasses
Soothes my sandpapery throat
Thus preventing coughs
Haiku # 2769 December 17, 1999 9:33 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
Subsided swelling
Leaves my skin hanging in folds
Like velvet curtains
Haiku # 2768 December 17, 1999 9:32 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
Fake tomato plant
Held up with a bamboo cane
Fruitless, like a search
Haiku # 2767 December 17, 1999 9:31 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
One, twenty-six, five,
Twelve, nine hundred oh, Edward,
There are too many.
Haiku # 2765 December 17, 1999 8:17 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
good tidings we bring
or some other jolly thing
a ring-a-ding ding
Haiku # 2764 December 17, 1999 4:13 am ET
by ash
Dear my job.
I hate coming to visit.
You overwhelm me with your hospitality.
Haiku # 2763 December 16, 1999 11:27 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
In the laundry room
The lonliness permeates
Deep into your clothes
Haiku # 2762 December 16, 1999 4:51 pm ET
by Tony's Grandpa
Doing the wash sucks!
I think I need a maid here.
To clean up this place!
Haiku # 2761 December 16, 1999 4:50 pm ET
by Tony's Grandpa
ha ha ha ha ha
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
That is so very fun
Haiku # 2760 December 16, 1999 10:12 am ET
by neo of Canada
Hold it in your hand
Be the best friend you can be
Kiss it...yes...kiss it
Haiku # 2759 December 15, 1999 10:04 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Late night close-up smiles
Show me that you like the touch
When my tongue is there
Haiku # 2758 December 15, 1999 9:51 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
first i become those
my parents warned me about
then i became them
Haiku # 2757 December 15, 1999 6:24 am ET
by ash
between now and then
twixt today and tomorrow
the same conjunction
Haiku # 2756 December 15, 1999 6:22 am ET
by ash
These god damned drivers!
They don''t have a clue today.
Where is my pill box?
Haiku # 2755 December 14, 1999 8:08 pm ET
by Tony's Grandpa
Tip toed through the room
So not to wake the bovine
Hey....we all need lovin!
Haiku # 2754 December 14, 1999 8:01 pm ET
by Tony's Grandpa
Wretched bag of poop
Left on my doorstep tonight
By those bastard kids
Haiku # 2753 December 14, 1999 7:55 pm ET
by Tony's Grandpa
a quaint bungalow
hibachi blackened lambchops
crossword puzzle hell
Haiku # 2752 December 14, 1999 5:55 pm ET
by Basho-matic
if you can dream it
than it''s possible, they say
that''s ridiculous
Haiku # 2751 December 14, 1999 1:35 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
six pieces of meat
one obscene bowling trophy
seven tylenol
Haiku # 2750 December 14, 1999 1:34 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
in my mom''s house dress
i sing songs about nothing
and piss in the food

Haiku # 2749 December 14, 1999 1:29 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
nobody can see
the rainbow
on my rear window
Haiku # 2748 December 14, 1999 1:00 pm ET
by What-Bad-Means? of Is that all?, Grow up!
January is........
A time for new direction
In warmer climates
Haiku # 2747 December 14, 1999 12:02 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
the skys are blue today
i''m writing just to say hey
so what do you think?
Haiku # 2746 December 13, 1999 5:03 pm ET
by AmBeR of cHeStEr,
ultramarathon
thirtyone miles thru the mist
sure''s nice to sit down

the brave legs are spent
beaten up by hilly trails
but beer soothes the soul
Haiku # 2745 December 13, 1999 9:56 am ET
by mondongo of Houston
A stolen moment
Outside in a grassy knoll
Hope no one saw us.
Haiku # 2744 December 12, 1999 9:31 pm ET
by hhtigerlily
Who wrote the book of
love? I didn''t.You didn''t.
We don''t want to know.
Haiku # 2743 December 11, 1999 8:49 pm ET
by Basho-matic
Frigid afternoons
Cover me like a blanket
When you say good bye
Haiku # 2742 December 11, 1999 5:42 am ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Haiku obsession
All I touched turned to ka ka
I needed a break
Haiku # 2741 December 10, 1999 11:10 pm ET
by hhtigerlily
sliver of the shat-
tered mayonnaise jar in my
arse. could you yank it?
Haiku # 2740 December 10, 1999 8:20 pm ET
by Basho-matic
a gray road turns west
one sun turns gray
an airplane shatters the lake
Haiku # 2739 December 10, 1999 2:26 pm ET
by tub-thumper
the green park in winter
trees bend from cold rain
a garbage truck blows smoke into my face
Haiku # 2738 December 10, 1999 2:19 pm ET
by tub-thumper
a painting of river stones
water color brush
a bird sings with laughter
Haiku # 2737 December 10, 1999 2:17 pm ET
by tub-thumper
Sometimes Sara sees
the mirror I almost kiss.
More often than I.
Haiku # 2736 December 10, 1999 1:02 pm ET
by Bleeding One
Pandas big tummies
delightfully round and taut
can hold a family

Junior brave and dim
Swaggering with young man''s guts
Those guts are tasty

Father fat protector
Like passion beats fangs and claws
His head is crunchy
Haiku # 2735 December 10, 1999 10:53 am ET
by Fruity of Oakland,
It`s like semaphore
But with helium-filled frogs
Instead of two flags
Haiku # 2734 December 10, 1999 7:38 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
Shiny appliance
So unconditionally
Rounded, like a egg
Haiku # 2733 December 10, 1999 7:35 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
Ah, slim minute hand
Smoothly sweeping round the face
How I adore you
Haiku # 2732 December 10, 1999 7:32 am ET
by Kenneth Extension