Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 79 Days and 78057 Haiku later...
A Haiku has seventeen syllables.
Not no sixteen or eighteen.
Haiku # 2773 December 17, 1999 10:28 am ET
by farkel
Five, seven, five
The rhythm of the haiku
Five, seven, five
Haiku # 2772 December 17, 1999 9:47 am ET
by Spike
Tissue, once soggy
But now long since dry, adheres
Texturing the wall
Haiku # 2771 December 17, 1999 9:39 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
Sore, wet carpet burn
Brands your coccyx with a mark
That says ''Not Virgin''
Haiku # 2770 December 17, 1999 9:37 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
Brackish molasses
Soothes my sandpapery throat
Thus preventing coughs
Haiku # 2769 December 17, 1999 9:33 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
Subsided swelling
Leaves my skin hanging in folds
Like velvet curtains
Haiku # 2768 December 17, 1999 9:32 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
Fake tomato plant
Held up with a bamboo cane
Fruitless, like a search
Haiku # 2767 December 17, 1999 9:31 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
One, twenty-six, five,
Twelve, nine hundred oh, Edward,
There are too many.
Haiku # 2765 December 17, 1999 8:17 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
good tidings we bring
or some other jolly thing
a ring-a-ding ding
Haiku # 2764 December 17, 1999 4:13 am ET
by ash
Dear my job.
I hate coming to visit.
You overwhelm me with your hospitality.
Haiku # 2763 December 16, 1999 11:27 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
In the laundry room
The lonliness permeates
Deep into your clothes
Haiku # 2762 December 16, 1999 4:51 pm ET
by Tony's Grandpa
Doing the wash sucks!
I think I need a maid here.
To clean up this place!
Haiku # 2761 December 16, 1999 4:50 pm ET
by Tony's Grandpa
ha ha ha ha ha
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
That is so very fun
Haiku # 2760 December 16, 1999 10:12 am ET
by neo of Canada
Hold it in your hand
Be the best friend you can be
Kiss it...yes...kiss it
Haiku # 2759 December 15, 1999 10:04 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Late night close-up smiles
Show me that you like the touch
When my tongue is there
Haiku # 2758 December 15, 1999 9:51 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
first i become those
my parents warned me about
then i became them
Haiku # 2757 December 15, 1999 6:24 am ET
by ash
between now and then
twixt today and tomorrow
the same conjunction
Haiku # 2756 December 15, 1999 6:22 am ET
by ash
These god damned drivers!
They don''t have a clue today.
Where is my pill box?
Haiku # 2755 December 14, 1999 8:08 pm ET
by Tony's Grandpa
Tip toed through the room
So not to wake the bovine
Hey....we all need lovin!
Haiku # 2754 December 14, 1999 8:01 pm ET
by Tony's Grandpa
Wretched bag of poop
Left on my doorstep tonight
By those bastard kids
Haiku # 2753 December 14, 1999 7:55 pm ET
by Tony's Grandpa
a quaint bungalow
hibachi blackened lambchops
crossword puzzle hell
Haiku # 2752 December 14, 1999 5:55 pm ET
by Basho-matic
if you can dream it
than it''s possible, they say
that''s ridiculous
Haiku # 2751 December 14, 1999 1:35 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
six pieces of meat
one obscene bowling trophy
seven tylenol
Haiku # 2750 December 14, 1999 1:34 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
in my mom''s house dress
i sing songs about nothing
and piss in the food

Haiku # 2749 December 14, 1999 1:29 pm ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
nobody can see
the rainbow
on my rear window
Haiku # 2748 December 14, 1999 1:00 pm ET
by What-Bad-Means? of Is that all?, Grow up!
January is........
A time for new direction
In warmer climates
Haiku # 2747 December 14, 1999 12:02 pm ET
by SHAGGYDOO
the skys are blue today
i''m writing just to say hey
so what do you think?
Haiku # 2746 December 13, 1999 5:03 pm ET
by AmBeR of cHeStEr,
ultramarathon
thirtyone miles thru the mist
sure''s nice to sit down

the brave legs are spent
beaten up by hilly trails
but beer soothes the soul
Haiku # 2745 December 13, 1999 9:56 am ET
by mondongo of Houston
A stolen moment
Outside in a grassy knoll
Hope no one saw us.
Haiku # 2744 December 12, 1999 9:31 pm ET
by hhtigerlily
Who wrote the book of
love? I didn''t.You didn''t.
We don''t want to know.
Haiku # 2743 December 11, 1999 8:49 pm ET
by Basho-matic
Frigid afternoons
Cover me like a blanket
When you say good bye
Haiku # 2742 December 11, 1999 5:42 am ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Haiku obsession
All I touched turned to ka ka
I needed a break
Haiku # 2741 December 10, 1999 11:10 pm ET
by hhtigerlily
sliver of the shat-
tered mayonnaise jar in my
arse. could you yank it?
Haiku # 2740 December 10, 1999 8:20 pm ET
by Basho-matic
a gray road turns west
one sun turns gray
an airplane shatters the lake
Haiku # 2739 December 10, 1999 2:26 pm ET
by tub-thumper
the green park in winter
trees bend from cold rain
a garbage truck blows smoke into my face
Haiku # 2738 December 10, 1999 2:19 pm ET
by tub-thumper
a painting of river stones
water color brush
a bird sings with laughter
Haiku # 2737 December 10, 1999 2:17 pm ET
by tub-thumper
Sometimes Sara sees
the mirror I almost kiss.
More often than I.
Haiku # 2736 December 10, 1999 1:02 pm ET
by Bleeding One
Pandas big tummies
delightfully round and taut
can hold a family

Junior brave and dim
Swaggering with young man''s guts
Those guts are tasty

Father fat protector
Like passion beats fangs and claws
His head is crunchy
Haiku # 2735 December 10, 1999 10:53 am ET
by Fruity of Oakland,
It`s like semaphore
But with helium-filled frogs
Instead of two flags
Haiku # 2734 December 10, 1999 7:38 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
Shiny appliance
So unconditionally
Rounded, like a egg
Haiku # 2733 December 10, 1999 7:35 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
Ah, slim minute hand
Smoothly sweeping round the face
How I adore you
Haiku # 2732 December 10, 1999 7:32 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
I have two boxes
One is empty and open
The other isn`t
Haiku # 2731 December 10, 1999 7:31 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
Do you love Jesus?
No, not in a dirty way
In a lovely one
Haiku # 2730 December 10, 1999 7:09 am ET
by Kenneth Extension
lily blooms anew
must be a seasonal thing
or some new manure
Haiku # 2729 December 10, 1999 2:58 am ET
by ash
Eric Idle says
"Always look at the bright side
Of life!" Thanks Eric
Haiku # 2728 December 9, 1999 2:52 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
I retired from life
And found comfort in my death
And the world rejoiced
Haiku # 2727 December 9, 1999 2:50 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
Another bender-
gorilla night, sandpaper
sex. viagra death.
Haiku # 2726 December 9, 1999 1:37 pm ET
by Basho-matic
O object to the
mandatory kigo in
haiku, why is this?
Haiku # 2725 December 8, 1999 6:15 pm ET
by C Sharp
Rodent on the wheel
Running all fucking night long
Cat eats well tonight

Slingshot the hamster
Flying free through summer breeze
Till he hit a wall
Haiku # 2724 December 8, 1999 2:52 pm ET
by Phil Lacheau
The festive season
A time for getting shitfaced
And being naughty
Haiku # 2723 December 8, 1999 2:20 am ET
by hhtigerlily