Inside my own skin
There is something to be said
About how I feel

Zero tolerance
Zero this and zero that
kamikazees rule

dipsomaniac
ba-humbugs infesting her
she deserves fruitcake

quite utterly stoked
here grinding out metaphors
i have found my niche

little white lies, no
never hurt the ones you love
send em U P S

Early morning stroll;
Winter constitutional:
My ears are quite cold.

It''s not that I''m not
sympathetic, it''s just that
I really don''t care.

Is it ignorance?
Is it apathy?
I don''t know and I don''t care.

A Haiku has seventeen syllables.
Not no sixteen or eighteen.

Five, seven, five
The rhythm of the haiku
Five, seven, five

Tissue, once soggy
But now long since dry, adheres
Texturing the wall

Sore, wet carpet burn
Brands your coccyx with a mark
That says ''Not Virgin''

Brackish molasses
Soothes my sandpapery throat
Thus preventing coughs

Subsided swelling
Leaves my skin hanging in folds
Like velvet curtains

Fake tomato plant
Held up with a bamboo cane
Fruitless, like a search

One, twenty-six, five,
Twelve, nine hundred oh, Edward,
There are too many.

good tidings we bring
or some other jolly thing
a ring-a-ding ding

Dear my job.
I hate coming to visit.
You overwhelm me with your hospitality.

In the laundry room
The lonliness permeates
Deep into your clothes

Doing the wash sucks!
I think I need a maid here.
To clean up this place!

ha ha ha ha ha
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
That is so very fun

Hold it in your hand
Be the best friend you can be
Kiss it...yes...kiss it

Late night close-up smiles
Show me that you like the touch
When my tongue is there

first i become those
my parents warned me about
then i became them

between now and then
twixt today and tomorrow
the same conjunction

These god damned drivers!
They don''t have a clue today.
Where is my pill box?

Tip toed through the room
So not to wake the bovine
Hey....we all need lovin!

Wretched bag of poop
Left on my doorstep tonight
By those bastard kids

a quaint bungalow
hibachi blackened lambchops
crossword puzzle hell

if you can dream it
than it''s possible, they say
that''s ridiculous

six pieces of meat
one obscene bowling trophy
seven tylenol

in my mom''s house dress
i sing songs about nothing
and piss in the food

nobody can see
the rainbow
on my rear window

January is........
A time for new direction
In warmer climates

the skys are blue today
i''m writing just to say hey
so what do you think?

ultramarathon
thirtyone miles thru the mist
sure''s nice to sit down

the brave legs are spent
beaten up by hilly trails
but beer soothes the soul

A stolen moment
Outside in a grassy knoll
Hope no one saw us.

Who wrote the book of
love? I didn''t.You didn''t.
We don''t want to know.

Frigid afternoons
Cover me like a blanket
When you say good bye

Haiku obsession
All I touched turned to ka ka
I needed a break

sliver of the shat-
tered mayonnaise jar in my
arse. could you yank it?

a gray road turns west
one sun turns gray
an airplane shatters the lake

the green park in winter
trees bend from cold rain
a garbage truck blows smoke into my face

a painting of river stones
water color brush
a bird sings with laughter

Sometimes Sara sees
the mirror I almost kiss.
More often than I.

Pandas big tummies
delightfully round and taut
can hold a family

Junior brave and dim
Swaggering with young man''s guts
Those guts are tasty

Father fat protector
Like passion beats fangs and claws
His head is crunchy

Haiku # 2735, December 10, 1999 10:53 am ET

by Fruity of Oakland,