Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 358 Days and 77343 Haiku later...

morning fogmass laying low
a moist dullwhite pancake floating above the ground
photon cushion
Haiku # 2678, November 29, 1999 7:26 am ET
by mondongo of Houston
My toaster has died
Just when I craved crispy bread
Feel the tragedy
Haiku # 2677, November 29, 1999 2:22 am ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Someday I will try
I will be the President
I will get shot down
Haiku # 2676, November 28, 1999 11:04 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
Universal Soldiers
Who pump aimlessly at night
Heaven sealed its'' door
Haiku # 2675, November 28, 1999 11:00 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
remember, poop chutes
are the universal hole
watch out pets, Run RUNNNN.
Haiku # 2674, November 28, 1999 10:54 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
As time rolls On, I
Realize Just What You Mean
To Me... a paycheck
Haiku # 2673, November 28, 1999 10:51 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
Unc'' "We wrote the book
on procrastination but
Haven''t published yet"
Haiku # 2672, November 28, 1999 10:42 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
a small mystery
why do they call it pussy
when it smells like fish?
Haiku # 2671, November 28, 1999 6:10 pm ET
by ash
Fireman hate drunks!
They crash the hook and ladder
and tap hose to keg!
Haiku # 2670, November 28, 1999 4:54 pm ET
by Kackarott
Engine still at home
No money motherfucker
Wont move til fifty!
Haiku # 2669, November 28, 1999 4:49 pm ET
by Kackarott
Michael McKiernan
Cat piss smelling interview
No fat firemen!
Haiku # 2668, November 28, 1999 4:37 pm ET
by Kackarott
the shit you''re making
equals the crap you''re faking
roger that houston!
Haiku # 2667, November 28, 1999 7:58 am ET
by Lifer of San Quentin,
dry turkeys kick ass
destroy your favorite groups
illuminati
Haiku # 2666, November 27, 1999 3:14 pm ET
by oldnasty
Red-heads love fat cock
Jake,too bad you can''t have mine.
Sorry but I''m straight
Haiku # 2665, November 26, 1999 10:44 pm ET
by HaiPoo
Chocolate sex queen
Spank your dance for me only
Oreo''s in hand
Haiku # 2664, November 24, 1999 10:47 am ET
by Kackarott
naked midget women mudwrestling
brownglistening jiggling tits spotlight
gleaming on slippery rump sparks my desire
Haiku # 2663, November 24, 1999 6:03 am ET
by mondongo of Houston
Ah, to gyrate here
inside a surly midget
dirty little guy
Haiku # 2662, November 23, 1999 7:31 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
my dearest midget,
how i long for us to make
lucrative movies
Haiku # 2661, November 23, 1999 7:25 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
you''re so lickety
I fear a groinal rupture
near my plinky poo
Haiku # 2660, November 23, 1999 7:10 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
licking my own nips
i''m searching for elixir
what became of my boku?
Haiku # 2659, November 23, 1999 7:05 pm ET
by Richard L. of Kumquat the sasquatch indian,
licking my own nips
i''m searching for elixir
what became of my boku?
Haiku # 2658, November 23, 1999 7:02 pm ET
by Richard L. of Kumquat the sasquatch indian,
bad haiku today
keeps the geisha girls away
cherry blossoms whine
Haiku # 2657, November 23, 1999 2:04 pm ET
by Basho-matic
crisp air, falling orange red leaves
magic just to be in the here and now
unless of course you''re a turkey
Haiku # 2656, November 23, 1999 1:49 pm ET
by mondongo of Houston
my boss just raped me
the cops said I asked for it
with my work ethic

so I killed the cops
and passed out their guns to crooks
one of whom raped me

the story''s moral?
don''t look so hard for morals
you fucking nitwit
Haiku # 2655, November 23, 1999 11:54 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
I''m a pinata
beat me good with a big stick
and candy results
Haiku # 2654, November 23, 1999 11:48 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
the furious ape
flings his feces at the sky
his god laughs at him
Haiku # 2653, November 23, 1999 11:39 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
one ''g'' for a bundle of wood
two ''g'' for a woody wanter
gee...
Haiku # 2652, November 23, 1999 7:22 am ET
by mondongo of Houston
Ah, do you not see?
If you can apply logic,
It`s just the one G.
Haiku # 2651, November 23, 1999 4:36 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Feet firmly on ground.
Attitude is Born Again.
There''s rebirth in Drink!
Haiku # 2650, November 23, 1999 2:49 am ET
by SHAGGYDOO
Tripped to Ottawa
The Land of soooooo many Pubs
It was a Bender
Haiku # 2648, November 23, 1999 2:40 am ET
by SHAGGYDOO
abandon all hope
ye who diddle away here
fame eludeth thee
Haiku # 2647, November 22, 1999 7:11 pm ET
by buzzer
orange and brown
words that suggest odor
pink
Haiku # 2646, November 22, 1999 11:54 am ET
by mondongo of Houston
I always thought that
Brown, with an emphasis on
Light was called ''Light Brown''.
Haiku # 2645, November 22, 1999 9:24 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Which scientists, where?
I bet they`re all colour-blind
And speccy, to boot.
Haiku # 2643, November 22, 1999 8:45 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
All scientists say
That chicks don`t know squat about
Things that are orange
Haiku # 2642, November 22, 1999 8:33 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Gather ye rosebuds
While ye may but better still
Buy a costly watch
Haiku # 2641, November 22, 1999 8:32 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
observing anal lifeform at elevator door
repeatedly pushing button thinking urgency will help
diagnose shit for brains
Haiku # 2640, November 22, 1999 6:25 am ET
by mondongo of Houston
reckon they ate moose
meat the gravy was wavy.
Ask Davy Crockett.
Haiku # 2639, November 21, 1999 6:13 pm ET
by buzzer
testosterone ice-
cream pulverizes tonsils
eskimo scrotums
Haiku # 2638, November 21, 1999 1:19 pm ET
by buzzer
hark what lipo suc-
tion signifies I detect
in your lips. Kiss off.
Haiku # 2637, November 21, 1999 1:04 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
hark what lipo suc-
tion signifies I detect
in your lips. Kiss off.
Haiku # 2636, November 21, 1999 1:04 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Magical Mushrooms
In a race to see who can
Get me more fucked up
Haiku # 2635, November 21, 1999 12:28 pm ET
by Y10K
Orange is simply
Brown with an empahsis on
Light instead of dark
Haiku # 2634, November 21, 1999 12:24 pm ET
by Y10k
He says it`s brownish,
When it`s quite clearly orange:
www.brainfudge.co.uk
Haiku # 2633, November 21, 1999 6:29 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
I hope you replied,
"My name`s Scott, not Sam, you whore!"
And then cast her out.
Haiku # 2632, November 21, 1999 6:23 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
She hardened like stone
Screaming her deepest passion
drenching my body!

Haiku # 2631, November 20, 1999 7:59 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
Now like an angel
Curled by my side, she wispered
Play it again, Sam.

Haiku # 2630, November 20, 1999 7:59 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
Her tightened stomach
accenting the sharp wavelengths
of her bouncing breasts

Haiku # 2629, November 20, 1999 7:56 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
She danced on her back
Undoing the bed clothing
Pouring out her soul
Haiku # 2628, November 20, 1999 7:53 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
Burrowing Down So Deep
I Rearranged her Psyche
Metamorphosis
Haiku # 2627, November 20, 1999 7:51 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
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