Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 43 Days and 77437 Haiku later...

Oh, I never knew
My back could ripple and flow.
Shiatsu massage.
Haiku # 1969, September 7, 1999 4:07 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
My wee dog nibbled
On a harmless toadstool.
Will she shrink or grow?
Haiku # 1968, September 7, 1999 4:03 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Beauty products
Sometimes smell like Dream Topping
But taste of plastic
Haiku # 1967, September 7, 1999 4:00 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
On long summer days
Men remove their shirts and walk
Topless on the streets
Haiku # 1966, September 6, 1999 5:41 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I lifted the veil
That masks the subconscious mind
And kissed its full lips
Haiku # 1965, September 6, 1999 5:39 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
The sun shines, tar melts
With lolly sticks, we create
Our names on the wall
Haiku # 1964, September 6, 1999 5:36 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Hail the size of Mars
Pounds the surface of the Earth
Ming is merciless
Haiku # 1963, September 6, 1999 5:35 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
someone once told me
"I am a superhero"
I promptly killed them :)
Haiku # 1962, September 5, 1999 2:44 pm ET
by Infinity
Raisin Head Prophet
Predicting Armageddon,
Get you A Snickers?
Haiku # 1961, September 4, 1999 9:58 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
Dead eyes fill my heart
Til it weighs me like potatoes
On my burdened couch
Haiku # 1960, September 4, 1999 9:52 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
Being remembered
Does not make you a legend
It makes you un-you.
Haiku # 1959, September 4, 1999 9:48 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
Metal Faced Woman
Being So Brave and Unique
Makes You More Alone
Haiku # 1958, September 4, 1999 9:45 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
That Gwyneth Paltrow
She`s really kinda scrawny
Fake English chicken
Haiku # 1957, September 4, 1999 4:34 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
the left one is blue
for my balls doth ache from lunch, fucking dog shit stew
Haiku # 1956, September 2, 1999 8:34 pm ET
by wilbydunn
My appologies
To those that are offended
Poor formatting sucks.
Haiku # 1955, September 2, 1999 7:32 pm ET
by Janis
Small names make for more Enjoyable, easier
To read haiku, Yes?
Haiku # 1954, September 2, 1999 7:30 pm ET
by Janis
I think that it''s fixed
But I''m testing it again
Just to be certain
Haiku # 1953, September 2, 1999 7:28 pm ET
by Janis
I''m very confused
With the formatting issues
I''ll fix it all soon
Haiku # 1952, September 2, 1999 7:27 pm ET
by Janis
Haiku in Yiddish
Means Lift Your Skirt In Public
Catch on America
Haiku # 1951, September 2, 1999 3:42 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
Idle Time Hero
My Creative Energy
Just Jizzed the Fishtank
Haiku # 1950, September 2, 1999 3:37 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
Stapled Left Thumbnai
Fountains of Plasmic Beauty
DeNiroing Home
Haiku # 1949, September 2, 1999 2:49 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
Stapled Left Thumbnail
Haiku # 1948, September 2, 1999 2:48 pm ET
by Scott of Alton,
What vile micturate
Drips down that grimy surface
Could it be BoyZone?
Haiku # 1947, September 2, 1999 12:42 pm ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
So few musicians
Are spawned in bubbling vats
Or so they tell us
Haiku # 1946, September 2, 1999 12:32 pm ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I can''t bend the moon
But I''d like to ask for the
Iron Catalogue please.
Haiku # 1945, September 2, 1999 8:11 am ET
by Ed of London, UK
down in the backyard
a rabbit-shit factory
processes pellets
Haiku # 1944, September 2, 1999 5:45 am ET
by ash
splashing in the tank
transmorphic amphibian
not quite a frog
Haiku # 1943, September 2, 1999 5:41 am ET
by ash
stove clock malfunctions
unexpected beeping sounds
fifty-four o''clock
Haiku # 1942, September 2, 1999 5:37 am ET
by ash
Less and less items
Are made triangularly
And soon there''ll be none
Haiku # 1941, September 2, 1999 5:17 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
A minor seventh
Sends me spiralling downwards
Like a falling leaf
Haiku # 1940, September 2, 1999 5:14 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Radio aerial
Inside my head lies broken
Reception is poor
Haiku # 1939, September 2, 1999 5:13 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
An inflatable
Vagina lurks by the steps
Who could have left it?
Haiku # 1938, September 2, 1999 5:12 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Are your cameras
Always pointing at the sky
Photographing stars?
Haiku # 1937, September 2, 1999 5:10 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
If I were wealthy
I''d style my hair like that girl
From the Cardigans
Haiku # 1936, September 2, 1999 5:08 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
If I were a font
I''d have a little x-height
and true descenders
Haiku # 1935, September 2, 1999 5:06 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Do those frail creatures
Constructed from papi
Haiku # 1934, September 2, 1999 5:05 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I like brown bottles
They tend to have beer in them
Which is a bonus
Haiku # 1933, August 31, 1999 1:43 pm ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I wonder if God
Has gigantic fingernails
For picking his nose?
Haiku # 1932, August 31, 1999 1:42 pm ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I''d be happier
If I was as poseable
As an Action Man
Haiku # 1931, August 31, 1999 1:37 pm ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
I was happy when
I had a new Tonka Toy
Ah, those distant days
Haiku # 1930, August 31, 1999 1:36 pm ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Expressing yourself
In seventeen syllables
Is harder than you think
Haiku # 1929, August 31, 1999 9:32 am ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
Mmm, Kraft Cheese Slices.
Strange how I find flat foodstuffs
quite so exciting.
Haiku # 1928, August 31, 1999 9:11 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
Vocabulary.
Mine has gone down the toilet.
Must eat Thesaurus
Haiku # 1927, August 31, 1999 9:05 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
I am neither nerd
nor puritan technophobe.
I am: METAGEEK
Haiku # 1926, August 31, 1999 9:03 am ET
by Scrunty Hardbody
haiku are too short for me
I like really long
long long long long long long
Haiku # 1925, August 30, 1999 9:52 pm ET
by Tomsam
Haikus are silly
I hate this site and Haikus
They dont even rhyme
Haiku # 1924, August 30, 1999 9:24 pm ET
by Sam Smith
The Bed I did wet
Straight after I liked it clean
So Mum cannot know
Haiku # 1923, August 30, 1999 8:59 pm ET
by Justin Latimer & Sam Smith of Auckland, New Zealand
A lazy comet
Etches a line in the sky
Like a fingernail
Haiku # 1922, August 30, 1999 1:36 pm ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
The weeks that we work
Amount to nothing more than
Some weeks we worked in
Haiku # 1921, August 30, 1999 1:35 pm ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
My infinite well
Of witty retorts is full
Of clicking beetles
Haiku # 1920, August 30, 1999 1:34 pm ET
by Kenneth Extension of Yuggoth
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